Fragments

Voices, crying inside my head
Hurting, hiding, hallucinations
A small child abandoned, unwanted
A young woman, searching for love and protection
A strong woman, indifferent to the suffering
A man, struggling with his sexual identity
And lost in the crowd, the one called "I"

He does not love I
But I love Him, so I escape the broken heart
And the young boy emerges
He loves the young boy
Not paternally, but sexually
The child is confused
His new daddy is touching him, hurting him
He is sure this is wrong, but too young to cry for help
Who would hear him, who would listen
The others are glad to be out of focus

The young woman marries Him
Dreams of a life of provision and strength
But He does not want the love of the woman
He wants to take His anger out on her
Rage, fire, temper take their toll
Broken bones, bruises, blisters
Unimaginable pain inflicted because the boy won't visit
She takes the pain to protect the boy from His grip

The strong woman is His friend, His confidant
But He does not tell her what He does with the others
She does not know
Inside of I they do not all share their thoughts
He and she hike, fish, play their games
To Him, she is one of the boys, and He respects her
But she does not stay long, as He bores her
She cannot hold focus for long and blackness covers her world
She vacates the stage and another soul anchors the body

The young man is married to the strong woman
But the young man is in love with Him
How he wishes he could tell Him
But he must keep his struggle hidden
He fears losing the friendship, the respect
Fighting his own inner conflict, he too stays only briefly
Leaving the boy and the young woman at His wrath

I have long ago said farewell to the inner voices
I have long ago removed myself from His torture
But the memories haunt me, ghosts from my past
Are they still hiding in the dark corners of my soul
Will they visit again
I can feel them, but their voices are silent
Love is the only glue that can hold the fragments together
I must find love
"Daddy, is he near?"
"Shhh, we'll find him soon"

From Whence you Came