| The Sunday Scoop Edition #4 Life is urine soaked and cute Why is it that advertising companies insist on mixing children (in the non-sadistic way) with electrical appliances? I know that they have that whole "so easy a child can operate it" concept, but surely that can't be all. Maybe they're hoping parents will see it and think of it as a way of getting children to take over the housework. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't let my child near a remote control (let alone a dishwasher) for fear of him getting it stuck in his ear. I shudder to even think what would happen with a washing machine. Yet this week, I stumble upon an ad where 7-year-olds can operate washing machines and dogs help carry the laundry. That's right, you know the one -- LG's Intello washer. We start out with a young boy in his bed who wakes up from a nightmare to find that he has wet his bed. Sure, nothing unusual here, until he looks down at his faithful mutt who is on the floor and whispers, "Don�t tell mum". Now yes, it's true that children are often na�ve, some are slow, but unless this boy's dog has inherited genes from Scooby-Doo ("Excruse me, but rour shon ret the bed rast night. Now can I rhave a Scooby Snack?"), I don't think he's in any danger of having his secret spilled. So then the boy (let's call him Peter Piddle-Pants, because alliteration is fun) gets his bed cover and begins to drag it to the laundry with the assistance of Scooby. Wow, that is one well-trained dog. I bet not even Lassie would carry her master's urine-soaked blanket all the way to the laundry in her mouth. Eventually after dragging the blanket all over the floor (gee, mum won't notice that wet trail all the way from the bedroom -- must have been a giant snail) we arrive at the laundry. However what little Peter hasn't noticed is that he has woken mum and she has followed him the whole way (like any loving parent would do, so that when they catch the child in the middle of whatever it is they are up to, they can then scare the shyt out of them). Yet mum is still curious and decides to watch what Peter does. Like the genius child he is, Peter puts his blanket into the washing machine and operates it with ease (and yet he thinks his dog is a tattle tail). Then he and Scooby sit there and watch it spin around and around and around -- hours of fun for the whole family. However, when Scooby makes a slight whining noise (probably wanting a drink to get rid of the urine taste) Peter gives her a harsh "shhhhh!" and they continue to watch the machine with their heads tilted Forrest Gump style. What a Kodak moment -- mum should get the camera. But where is mum? Well, she's leaning on the laundry doorway smiling down fondly at the pair of rascals. Uh huh. Well, I don't know about anyone else, but if my child wet the bed the fact that he figured out how to operate the washing machine wouldn't be the most important thing at that time. For one, his sheets and mattress would need cleaning as well as the urine soaked clothes that he is still sitting in (told you he was a smart kid). Ahh but alas, in this wacky world of advertising dirty is cute, children can operate machines and dogs can't be trusted with secrets. But I think we're forgetting what is important; the machine is "whisper quiet" as the voice-over man put it. Amen to that. Sarah Taylor, Professional smart-ass. |