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"Ghost in the Machine" is a somewhat less than serious Ars Magica adventure, intended to make players hoot and howl with laughter, although to be honest they are more likely to groan and whimper at my dreadful sense of humor. The actual plot of the adventure is fairly weak, since it is intended primarily as a vehicle for the jokes. The basic premise behind the adventure is to take some of the old expressions which we humans use far too often and...well...kick them while they're down a bit for amusement's sake.
This adventure is best run as light relief after particularly dramatic and tragic stories. This will both lighten the mood and also emphasize the dramatic significance of what has come before. It is best run for starting to mid-level characters. Although the emphasis is on roleplaying rather than die-rolling, if more experienced characters are used, NPCs may need to be strengthened a little. Players who really get into the dreadful humor of the adventure should be rewarded with extra experience. By the same token, do not be afraid to be merciless with players who accidentally come out with a customary metaphor. For example, if a player comments to another that the Barmaid is "giving him the eye," sure enough, she will stroll up, remove one of her eyeballs and present it to him (this may cause problems with the Innkeeper). Indeed, the Storyguide should alter and add details to the adventure if other such expressions come to mind.
The characters wake one morning to discover that their covenant and everything within it have been moved to particularly awful part of Arcadia, where spoken expressions reflect literal truth. Setting out to investigate, they must negotiate with a knight in shining armor, make their way through a rain of cats and dogs, avoid mud and daggers at the Red Lion inn, fight their way across a troll bridge, and climb a rock of ages before facing the ghost of the insane magus who caused them to be brought to this dreadful place.
The cause of the characters' plight is the machinations of a magus named Insanitus Maximus of House Verditius. Sensing that he was nearing death, despite his longevity potion, he built a massive machine with which to channel magical energy into his body, hoping thereby to strengthen his failing constitution. Needing a source of this energy, he magically "plugged" the machine into the aura of the nearest covenant... Unfortunately for Insanitus and the characters, the machine did not work exactly as intended. Insanitus was blasted into Twilight, only to be drawn back to his laboratory again as a gibbering wreck of a ghost. Meanwhile, his tower and the characters' covenant was drawn into Faerie, where it will remain until the machine is disabled. Insanitus is now a ghost, and so is unable to do this. Guess who that leaves?
The magi are woken in the morning by a massive smashing sound, followed by a number of soft, wet thudding sounds, which are accompanied by cries of alarm from the covenants' grogs. If any magus looks out of their window to see what is going on, read the following paragraph to them:
Your eyes are greeted by a strange sight. The covenant appears to be in the middle of a large clearing surrounded by an endless forest. Dawn has just broken, and now it is raining cats and dogs. Grogs dive for cover as rather surprised-looking poodles, great danes, dalmations, siameses, persians and British short-hairs plummet from a fractured blue sky. As the cats and dogs hit the ground, they make soft thudding sounds, before vanishing into thin air.
If any characters venture outside, they will suffer a Quality die of damage each round they spend in the open air, as a result being hit repeatedly by falling animals. Armor provides its usual Soak bonus, and shields held overhead provide a Soak bonus equal to half their Defense score (round up). Other items held overhead will provide similar bonuses, at Storyguide's discretion. Characters who look North will be faced with the following:
The forest extends northwards for what you estimate would be half a day's journey on foot, then halts at the base of a great grey cliff. Carved into the face of the cliff are five huge figures - a baby, a boy in his teens, a young man, a middle aged man, and an ancient man with a beard. They stare down on the forest with blank expressions. At the top of the cliff is a one-storey tower, made of what appears to be black stone.
The characters are likely to guess that they are in Arcadia, and so may wish to investigate the area. Give them enough time to decide what they want to do. Let them plot and scheme, and just as they have gathered their resources together, and they are about to put their master plan into action, a shout comes from the covenant gate. If any of the magi goes to investigate, they will meet the Knight. If they do not, he will politely request an introduction, and if it is refused, he will wait outside. When the characters eventually encounter him, read them the following:
The man facing you is approximately seven feet tall, with broad shoulders and a slender waist. He has long, golden hair which is tied back with a white ribbon, a full, square beard and a flashing, white-toothed smile. He is dressed in strange silver armor made of metal plates (plate mail - so what if it's out of period? This is Arcadia, after all...), which is so brightly polished it is almost blinding. An equally polished broadsword is slung at his left hip. He truly is a Knight in Shining Armor.
If outside, the characters will notice that the cats and dogs vanish before they touch the Knight, leaving him unharmed. The newcomer will merely introduce himself as "The Knight Protector," and explains that although it is normal for those entering the Faerie realm to face a challenge upon their arrival, he has been instructed that the characters are exempt from this condition, since they are not here by choice. He also explains that he is to be the characters' guide on their travels, and asks when they would like to leave.
The KnightThe Knight is the Guardian of this realm (see Faeries, pages 86-7), supervising the activities of any strangers who enter it, including the characters. He is also the epitome of the Knight in Shining Armor, being strong, brave, chivalrous and handsome. However, his natural advantages are both a blessing and a curse, for although he has never been defeated in combat, and is popular among the denizens of the realm, he is also constantly pestered by women who have fallen in love with him, and challenged by their jealous husbands. Unfortunately, his nature is such that he is incapable of playing down these advantages. His latest inadvertent conquest is the Barmaid at the Red Lion, which has made him unpopular with the Innkeeper, so now he normally avoids the tavern. He treats any player character who shows any signs of falling in love with him with his normal courtesy, but may be seen to adopt a slightly weary demeanor. Characteristics: Int +2, Per +3, Pre +5, Com +3, Str +5, Sta +5, Dex +3, Qik +3
Soak: (High Quality Full Plate Body and Limb Armor, with Great Helm, Mail Coif, Steel Cops and Mittens - Soak +22, Load -7, Per -4 when head armor worn, Dex -3 for fine manipulation when mittens worn) +27 |
If the characters ask any of the following questions, he will give the answers listed below:
If the characters accept the Knight's help, he assists their preparations for the expedition. If they refuse, he will return to his steed at the edge of the forest. In this case, he will hide until they have passed, and then trail them invisibly on his horse, appearing to step in if they get themselves in trouble. Whichever option they choose, he will under no circumstances let them bring cold iron into the forest, opposing them with force if necessary, although he is happy to change iron items into silver ones for the duration of the characters' visit. Characters may secrete small iron blades (no larger than a dagger) if they successfully roll higher than the Knight's Perception + Awareness + a stress die on a Dex + Legerdemain + stress die. If he catches any character attempting this, the Knight will insist on searching the entire party until he is sure all iron has been transformed or left behind.
Whether the characters accept the Knight's help or not, when they leave the covenant they must cross a 50 pace gap between its boundary and the forest edge. While they cross this they must continue to make damage rolls for falling animals, but when they reach the forest they will realize that the shower has stopped. Looking back, they will see that it continues to fall on the covenant and the clearing, but stops abruptly at the forest edge. A path leads into the forest.
If the Knight is with the characters, at this point they find a magnificent warhorse (if statistics are required, use those for the Horse from ArM4, page 260 or (preferably) the Destrier from Ordo Nobilis, page 209. The warhorse has a Faerie Might of 30) at the edge of the forest. Its hide is like the moon (indeed, it glows slightly, and characters who watch for a little time will notice that this glow varies, like that of the moon as clouds move across it), and it is saddled and harnessed with polished brown leather riding gear. On the pommel of the saddle is the Knight's helm, and slung at its side is a silver lance and shield. The shield bears no device. If the characters are walking, then the Knight leads his horse, after graciously offering to allow any lady present to ride it. If they are riding, he mounts up. If no-one objects, he takes the vanguard at the head of the column.
If the characters set off in any direction other than North, the Knight will leave them alone, and they will wander in the forest for a few hours, before winding up back at the clearing. Repeat this as often as necessary until they get the message. "What's for you won't go by you," as my grandmother used to say...
The first part of the journey through the forest is uneventful, and whether they are walking or riding, will appear to take a few hours. Eventually the characters begin to hear the distant sound of an animal roaring, which gradually gets louder. If he is with them, the Knight is unperturbed by this, and if asked will explain that it is the Red Lion. By mid-morning the characters emerge into another, smaller clearing, in the center of which is a low, thatched building with white-washed walls. An enormous red lion stalks purposefully around on the roof, roaring at the sky. It totally ignores the characters, even if attacked or targeted with magic. Such attacks do not affect the Red Lion in the slightest, but will earn a look of disapproval from the Knight, if he is present. If he is with them, he will indicate the door of the building, and instruct the characters to go inside and seek out the Little Old Man. He will not enter himself, for he wishes to avoid possible tensions with the Barmaid and the Innkeeper. If he is not present, whether they enter or not is up to them.
When the characters enter the building, read them the following:
You appear to be in a tavern of some sort. It is a long, low room, filled with assorted country folk, who are sipping drinks at a number of tables which fill it from end to end. At the far end is a fireplace, where a minstrel is slaughtering a tune on an old violin, blood and sawdust falling to the floor as he saws away at his instrument. The innkeeper gives you a welcoming nod from the bar, which runs along the left side of the room, while a dark haired young woman weaves her way between the tables, serving drinks as she gathers up her cloth. At the far end of the room, at a table to the right of the minstrel, a little old man sits alone at a table, nursing a mug of beer, to which he sings as he rocks it to sleep.
Characters who make Awareness rolls of 9+ will also notice that the Barmaid gives the most attractive character a coy smile, provided that the character in question has positive Presence. The Ease Factor of the roll is only 6+ for the character in question. If no character is sufficiently attractive, she ignores the entire group completely unless directly spoken to.
It is likely that the characters will go straight to the Little Old Man, but if they speak to either the Barmaid or the Innkeeper, they will be generally helpful and friendly, although uninformed of anything beyond the clearing in which the inn stands. If necessary they will direct the characters to the Little Old Man. If the characters approach anyone else in the inn, feel free to populate it with a variety of local country folk. Draw on as many stereotypes as possible in order to enhance the clichéd feel of the story. Once again, these individuals know little, and will direct the characters to the Little Old Man if they are unable to answer their questions.
The Barmaid and the Innkeeper are husband and wife, but the Barmaid has become infatuated with the Knight, which explains his choosing to remain outside. The Innkeeper is aware of his wife's infatuation with another man, but does not know who the other man is. This means he is extremely jealous, and suspects every stranger of being his wife's beloved. If any male character is over-friendly towards the Barmaid, he will find himself the target of a muddy projectile from the bar. Whether it hits the character or not, if he looks in that direction, tell him that the Innkeeper is giving him "a dirty look." If the character ignores this warning and continues to flirt with the Barmaid, a pair of daggers fly from the bar at him. If he looks in that direction, he will see the Innkeeper "looking daggers" at him. If at any point the character picks a fight with the Innkeeper, the tavern's patrons will cheerfully join in on both sides, and a major brawl will break out. Most of the tavern's patrons have characteristic scores of 0 and Brawl skill at level 3. If any character draws a weapon, the fight becomes more dangerous, as the NPCs do the same. Give the characters a chance to work off a few tensions (or have a few tensions worked off on them), then have the Knight come in to break it up, reproach the participants, and lead the characters away.
The InnkeeperThe Innkeeper is of medium height, and barrel-chested, with a bald head, twinkling blue eyes, and a smile that fades only when he looks at his wife. He dresses in leather trews and a cream-colored smock. He is friendly enough, welcoming the characters if approached and doing his best to answer their questions. However, he does not really have the answers they seek, and will soon direct them to the Little Old Man. Should any character show undue interest in the Barmaid, he becomes initially jealous, and if the flirtation continues, outright hostile towards the offending character, as described in the main text of the adventure. Characteristics: Int 0, Per 0, Pre -1, Com 0, Str +2, Sta +1, Dex 0, Qik -1
Soak: +1 The BarmaidThe Barmaid is young and beautiful, with a shapely figure that enhances her looks. Her dark brown hair falls in a wave down to her mid-back, and her amber eyes glimmer in the firelight. She dresses in a brown woolen skirt and white blouse, both of which are sufficiently clinging to show off her figure. Her demeanor is friendly, but slightly self-centered, and she will do her best to help the characters, although she is likely to direct them to the Little Old Man eventually. However, she knows she is attractive, and is very proud of the fact. She encourages attention from attractive males, for although she is married to the Innkeeper, she finds him ugly and boring, and so is not above seeking entertainment elsewhere. Recently she was herself the victim of another's charms, falling for the Knight, although this has not stopped her from taking an interest in other men. Her feelings for the Knight have caused problems between her and her husband, and the tension between them may spill over into violence if any male character responds to her charms. Characteristics: Int +2, Per +1, Pre +5, Com +3, Str -1, Sta -2, Dex +2, Qik +1
Soak: -3 |
If the characters have not had the chance to meet the Little Old Man at the inn, this encounter will take place in a clearing further up the forest path.
When the characters come closer to the Little Old Man, they will realize that he is no more than two feet tall, and is extremely wrinkled. He has a shock of white hair and an incredibly long white beard that falls from his chin to the floor. His eyes, however, are a very deep shade of blue, and entirely alert. He invites the characters to sit down, then stares at each of them with a contemplative eye before greeting them by name. He is friendly, but very composed, the epitome of the wise sage (and every little old man you find in taverns in roleplaying games). He will answer any questions the characters ask to the best of his ability, provided they are polite. If they become rude, attempt to harm him or cast spells at him, he vanishes in a puff of foul-smelling smoke, and they will earn the enmity of any other faeries who witness his disappearance. He will give the following answers to the following questions:
Game statistics are not really required for the Little Old Man, but assume he has Mythic Intelligence, Presence 1, the Abilities Know Whatever the Storyguide Wants Him to Know 8, Look Wise 8, and the power to vanish instantly if threatened.
If the characters tell the Knight what the Little Old Man said, he comments regarding the Troll Bridge that, "We can cross that bridge when we come to it." He then leads them on up the forest path. If he is not with them, the characters will probably head on up the path on their own. If they plunge into the forest, they will wander for a few hours, before finding themselves back at the clearing.
Assuming the characters eventually follow the forest path, they will travel on for two or three hours before coming to the northern edge of the forest. Read the following out:
The forest ends abruptly at a wide stone ledge, which stretches away to either side of you. The ledge also extends ahead of you for about 20ft before dropping away into a ravine some 50ft wide. On the opposite side of the ravine is another ledge about 5ft wide and 10ft deep, at the opposite side of which is the foot of the cliff. The Rock of Ages towers above you, its carved figures staring down at you blankly. However, of more immediate concern is what is on the near edge of the ledge. A granite pillar, about 10ft tall, guards each side of the way onto a stone bridge that spans the chasm. The bridge itself is about 5ft wide, with a 3ft high stone wall on either side. It rises to a hump in the middle, before descending to the other side. Standing in front of the pillars are two huge, filthy, ugly humanoid creatures dressed in animal skins,each broad-shouldered, but hunched over and twisted. They carry long, crude clubs, and glower at you malevolently. This would appear to be the Troll Bridge.
This is the tension release for players who have been getting bored with a combat-less adventure. If the characters attempt to cross the bridge, or attack the trolls, the trolls will attack back, along with the rest of the clan, who live beneath the bridge (where else?). The number of trolls is not fixed, but assume they keep on coming until the characters have had a good fight. When you think they have had enough, the ground starts to shake as boulders begin to fall down the Rock of Ages. If the Knight is present, he looks at the cliff, and shouts, "Rockfall, come on!" He then charges forward, using a feat of Mythic Strength to sweep the trolls from the bridge and clear the way. Turning, he beckons the characters forward and shoves them across the bridge, so that they are ahead of him, with him guarding the rear. It is important that this is his position at this point, for the next episode.
TrollThe trolls are big, strong, and very, very stupid. Their major aims in life are to eat a lot (anyone or anything they can catch) and prevent anyone from crossing their bridge. More complex ideas confuse them and make their heads hurt, so they tend to avoid thinking about them if at all possible. Characteristics: Int -4, Per -2, Pre -5, Com -4, Str +6, Sta +6, Dex 0, Qik -2
Soak: (Tough Skin) +12 |
If the Knight is not present, the rockfall begins once you think the characters have had enough. Allow them a brief respite; the trolls are intimidated by their prowess, and back off, giving them the chance to cross the bridge.
If the party is not terribly well-equipped for combat, or has already suffered badly from brawling at the inn, then the trolls will be slightly less belligerent, and will let the party cross if they are appropriately bribed or reasoned with. The rockfall begins when the party are halfway across the bridge. Once again, the Knight should be bringing up the rear.
Miraculously, none of the falling boulders actually hits any of the party members (if you feel cruel, have them make some Athletics rolls to dodge these, and inflict some damage on anyone who fails). However if the Knight is present, by chance a particularly gigantic boulder falls on the end of the bridge between him and the last party member, smashing the bridge. Once the boulder has fallen past, they will see that the Knight has vanished. If the Knight is not present, the boulder merely smashes the bridge, stranding the characters on the ledge. Read them the following:
Soon the rockfall stops. On the other side of the ravine, three trolls, the only ones remaining, shake their fists and clubs at you. Looking up, you realize that you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. There is no other way on from the ledge except up the Rock of Ages.
Allow the characters a chance to draw breath, to treat their wounds, and to mourn the loss of their companion, if they are so inclined. The sun is directly overhead, and will not advance much beyond this position, however long they rest (it should be apparent by now that time moves a bit strangely here). The trolls will do little more than jeer during this period, although they may run for cover if attacked. Once the characters are adequately rested, they may begin to climb the cliff. Unless magic is employed, this will require each character climbing to make Dexterity + Climb stress roll of 12+ for each 10ft climbed (the cliff is about 100ft tall). Failure indicates that the character has been forced to move diagonally rather than straight up, resulting in a reduction in the distance climbed on this attempt by a number of feet equal to the amount by which the ease factor was missed (yes, the character may have to move downwards on a spectacularly bad failure). A botch indicates a fall, as usual, but such falls are assumed to land on the ledge. On the other hand, each successful roll allows the character to climb an additional number of feet equal to the amount by which they exceeded the ease factor. The party may wish to send their most skilled member to the top, and then have them lower a rope. There are boulders at the top to which a rope may be secured in such a case, assuming the party has a long enough rope with them. Characters climbing using a rope should make Strength + Climb stress rolls of 6 + Size for each 10ft climbed, using the same rules given above to modify the distance climbed.
When the first character reaches the top of the cliff, read out the following:
You pull yourself over the cliff edge and pause to catch your breath. When you finally look around, the first thing that catches your attention is the tower on the clifftop. It is a cylindrical structure, about 12ft high and 15ft across. A low doorway faces you, blocked by a studded iron door. Rather than being made of black stone, as it seemed to be from a distance, the tower is in fact coated in a thick layer of soot. The ground immediately surrounding the tower is similarly blackened and burned. The smell of burning meat fills the air.
Any characters with appropriate Abilities or Virtues, such as Magic Sensitivity or Aura Sense, will be able to feel the magic which surrounds this edifice, even without a roll. The sensation is similar to that of the air just before a storm, and is so intense it effectively blocks out finer detailed perception using these abilities. The aura here is Magical, with a score of 6, but is also barely controlled. Any characters rolling 0 on a stress die for magical activities should roll 3 botch dice. Magi who botch are likely to enter Twilight.
Wise characters will wait for the rest of the party before attempting to enter the tower. If they do not, then proceed to the next scene. Likewise, once the party is gathered and enters the tower, go on to the next scene.
The iron door yields to the touch, creaking open in an ominous fashion. Once they have created suitable light sources, the characters will be able to see inside. The inside of the tower consists of one room, which like the outside of the tower is coated with a fine layer of soot. At the center of the room is Insanitus' machine. It consists of an iron frame in the shape of a hemisphere 5ft across and 5ft tall, at the top of which is a large, glowing, red gemstone. The gemstone pulsates faintly, in time with a barely audible gibbering sound that fills the room. Directly below the gemstone is a rectangular iron table, upon which rests the burnt and blackened corpse of a human being. It is so badly burned that any finer features are unrecognizable.
The machine binds the characters' covenant in Faerie, and since there is no way to turn it off, it will need to be destroyed. It may be struck on an attack roll of 0+, has a Soak of +20, and 10 Body Levels. However, to complicate things, Insanitus' ghost is currently occupying the frame of the machine, and will do his best to prevent damage to the machine. If any character approaches within a few paces of the machine, he will attempt to possess them. If successful, he will use his host body to attack the nearest threat to the machine. If his host body is killed or disabled, he will immediately attempt to jump to the next nearest individual, probably the one who disabled his host.
The Ghost of Insanitus MaximusCharacteristics: Int -2, Per 0, Pre -3, Com -5, Str -3, Sta +4, Dex +2, Qik +3 |
When the machine loses its last Body Level, a keening wail fills the room, accompanied by a gale force wind that extinguishes all flames. Insanitus' spirit is being sucked away into the Twilight void. After a few seconds, the wind and wail both stop as abruptly as they began, and characters with appropriate skills may notice that the Magical aura is gone, to be replaced by the usual aura for Arcadia (Faerie 10). Certainly the atmosphere is not as oppressively thick as it was previously.
It is time to go home, and this should soon become clear. If characters attempt to explore the forest, they will wander aimlessly for a couple of hours, before re-emerging at the tower. The only way back is down the cliff again. When the characters arrive at the bottom, they will see the Knight sitting on the opposite side of the ravine, looking a little battered, and surrounded by the bodies of the remaining trolls. If questioned, he explains that the boulder that struck him and his horse threw them from the bridge and against the opposite side of the ravine. His horse, sadly, did not survive, but he was able to hold onto a crack on the cliff face, pull himself back up to the edge of the ravine and dispatch the remaining trolls before sitting down to await the characters' return. This is all explained in a very matter-of-fact fashion, without any hint of boastfulness.
The Knight will do his best to aid any attempts to cross back over the ravine, catching thrown ropes and securing them, for example. He then insists on leading the characters back to their covenant, despite his wounds, explaining that they must be back before darkness falls. He leads them back along the same path, past the Red Lion (which is sleeping on the roof of the inn), and not allowing any breaks for rest. When the characters arrive back at the site of the covenant the sun is setting, and they will see that the rain of animals has stopped. They should be able to make it home without further injury. The Knight sees them to the gates, bids them farewell, then turns and disappears back into the forest. Shortly afterwards pitch darkness falls with an audible thud. When the sun rises the next day, the characters will find that they have returned to the mundane realm, and it is once again safe to use their favorite expressions!
Text copyright © Niall Christie 2003.