Happiness Is Measured out In Miles

 

CHAPTER THIRTY THREE

 

         When we came back from Austria, the Beatles continued filming at Twickenham. Nothing had changed during the time we had spent there. Eli and I hardly spoke to each other. Wel, she wasn't eager, I don't know why. They also continued working on the album that would go with the film. In between, John and the other guys attended parties. Edu and Eli usually accompanied them. I never did. I didn't want another unpleasant scene with John.

 

         The highlight of that period, the best thing that happened to me that spring, was when I met Bob Dylan. Edu was with me, John knew Bob had been one of my all-times favourite and he was playing the Royal Festival Hall. When John told me he was going to see him play, I couldn't help asking him if I could go with him.

 

-        "Luv, I'm telling ya becasue I know yer a big fan of his...", I became so excited and nervous that I phoned Edu.

 

-        "Edu, Edu!! You won't believe what's going to happen!", Edu almost shouted:

 

-        "Vicky! I know what it is. We're going to meet Bob Dylan!! George has told me! Bob Dylan!!

 

-        "Edu, do you know who we're talking about? Robert Zimmerman!! AHH!!", we were both shouting and screaming on the phone.

 

         We were very nervous. It was the first time I had gone to a concert of Bob Dylan, and we eight were there in the first row. Edu and I were looking at each other and almost crying when he sang 'The Times They Are A-Changin'. John looked at me:

 

-        "Luv, I don't know if to get jealous and kill this fuckin' Zimmerman or be gald fer ya...", I was like in a trance. And when we knew we were going to meet him personally in the hotel where he was staying, Edu and I almost fainted.

 

         There were a lot of people in the reception room. Allen Ginsberg, the poet, was there. The atmosphere was tense, no one said a word and Dylan was very in his own world, not paying much attention to any of us. We all sat on settees and sofas. Edu and I sat together. I was petrified. I had always wanted to ask him so many things, but there I was, without a word coming out of my mouth.

 

         Allen broke the ice falling into John's lap.

 

-        "Get a little bit closer, darling!", said John and broke the ice.

 

-        "Do you know William Blake, Lennon?", he asked him.

 

-        "Never heard of him", said John quite obviously. No, that was impossible. John wasn't going to be seen as the uncultured one in the room when he was very intelligent and had even written a book. At least, not in front of Bob Dylan.

 

-        "Oh, John, you liar! Of course you have!", I said. Everyone started laughing and I looked around and saw that everyone was relaxed except Dylan himself. How strange!, I thought to myself. I hadn't imagined him like that.

 

-        "What is your name?", said Dylan unexpectedly. Everybody shut up and looked at each other, not very sure who the question was addressed to. I would have sworn he was looking at me, but that was impossible. The room was full of beautiful women, among them Mike Jagger's girlfriend, Marianne Faithful, whom everybody considered a bombshell. "I am talking to you", he said, and yes, much to my surprise, he was talking to me. John becasme tense immediately.

 

-        "She's me bird and her name is Vicky", said John.

 

-        "I'll call you Magdalena", Bob went on. No one said a word and John was becoming more nervous than necessary.

 

-        "Look what I've got here!", Paul butted in. He had an acetate in his hand, maybe a new composition or something. John and most of the people in the room immediately became interested but not Dylan, and Paul had done it ti impress Dylan. Bob got up and walked out of the room. Everybody remained silent and the atmosphere was tense. We all thought Bob had left the room, and I could see Paul was almost in tears. But he came back and walked towards John and me.

 

-        "I've listened to your last album, Lennon", said Dylan. Great "I'm a Loser", intimate, divine".

 

-        "Thanks. It's what I felt. You told me, remember?", Dylan then looked at me.

 

-        "And haven't you written anything for Magdalena?", I was so impressed that I was actually talking to Bob Dylan, one of my idols, that I was speechless.

 

-        "Her name's Vicky, Zimmerman", said John, smiling. "But I know what ya mean. Lovely, ain't she?"

 

-        "You should write something for her"

 

-        "I've already done it. There's a song especialy for her in our last record".

 

         At that moment, George and Edu approached us. Edu was trembling, of course, she was as nervous as I was. Dylan didn't call her anything else but Edu and George chatted a bit to him. After a while, John suggested going to a pub. We all agreed and, Dylan included, we all went first to a club called the Speakeasy. John and Dylan didn't stop talking. They had grown a good friendship. George was also quite friendly with Dylan. Ringo was with Mo most of the time, taking care of her and they soon went home because she was feeling tired. But Paul was apart from the others, drinking incessantly and oblivious to everything. It was the first time I had seen Paul in such a state. Paul, George and Dylan were in deep conversation about songwriting and music. But I couldn't see Paul in that state, so I got up. Edu could read me like a book:

 

-        "Where are you going?", she asked me, holding my arm.

 

-        "To the toilet", I lied. She smiled.

 

-        "Don't start going to the toilet too much", she joked. "Everything was forgotten, remember". But that was not true. I hadn't forgotten about Paul and as I discovered later, Paul hadn't forgotten about me either. She got rid of my arm and I went to Paul, who had started wlking towards the counter. I followed him.  A couple of smashing and very beutiful girls stopped him in his way to the counter and literally jumped onto him. A pang of jealousy shook my whole body. I decided not to show and see how Paul reacted. He was trying to get rid of them but somehow coldn't. The girls persisted. One of them, and with so much bravety from her part, kissed him in the lips. That I couldn't resist. Where was Eli?

 

-        "Paul!", I shouted. He turned around and saw me. He smiled. The girls got rid of him but lingered on at his side. I approached them.

 

-        "Sorry, luv", he said to one of the girls. Then he turned to the other. "See ya later". The girls. quite reluctantly, went away, but didn't stop looking at us even from a long distance.

 

-        "See you later?", I asked. "Where's Eli?"

 

-        "Final exams or something, ya see.", Paul told me. He became serious again. The PR he was playing with the girls, went away.

 

-        "Is anything the matter?", I asked him. He shook his head.

 

-        "No, no, luv... A bit tired, that's all", he looked at me deeply in the eye. "Yer lovely today...", I looked at the floor. "I think you've impressed Dylan, ya see".

 

-        "Oh, Paul, you know that's not true... I'm going to the counter for something to drink. Do you want anything?", he lifted up his glass.

 

-        "No, ta, luv", said Paul.

 

-        "OK, I'll be right back", I went to ask for a Scotch with Coke. I was waiting for the waiter to attend me when I suddenly felt something really cold running down my spine. "Ahh!", I shouted turning around. And who sould I see but one of the two girls who had been flirting with Paul.

 

-        "Oh, I'm sorry", said one of the girls smiling. But her smile wasn't genuine, she had done it on purpose.

 

-        "Don't worry", I said, smiling but genuinely. I saw the girl turn around to talk to her friend.

 

-        "Oh, but if she can talk! Impressive!"

 

-        "I beg your pardon?", I said. I couldn't believe they were angry at me for something.

 

-        "How come the Beatles can have so bad taste for girls?", said one of them. I felt a lump in my throat and my eyes became wet. They were gorgeous, beautiful and sexy and well, yes, most likely Paul or even John would end with one of them in bed. I was feeling so bad, with my head in a whirl and my back and dress wet that I went to tell John I was going home.

 

         John, George, Dylan and Edu were in deep conversation when I arrived at their table. I stood there, looking at John, who was telling Dylan how the stones were doing. Suddeny, Dylan looked in my direction and saw me.

 

-        "Lovely Magdalena is here", he said. Everybody turned to look at me. John got up in a jump and held myface.

 

-        "Are you OK, luv?", I looked at my dress.

 

-        "No, John. Look, someone has spilled their drink on me and I'm all wet".

 

-        "Oh, fuckin' 'ell!" I'll tell Alf to give ya a lift".

 

-        "Don't worry, John. I'll drive 'er 'ome", said Paul. I hadn't noticed Paul was behind me.

 

-        "Are you crazy or what, Macca? No fuckin' way I'm leaving 'er in yer dirty 'ands"

 

-        "No, honestly, John. I think I'm going home too. I feel far too tired".

 

-        "Lennon and McCartney fighting over driving Magdalena home...", said Dylan and then he started to laugh.

 

-        "Alright", said John. "But Edu will go with ya...", we all came amazed and Edu looked at John in awe.

 

-        "But John..."

 

-        "C'me on, luv", George butted in. "You won't want to leave your friend alone with her dress all wet, will you", I looked at Edu. George and John were the best of friends inside the Beatles and outside. George did almost everything John suggested. Edu got up reluctantly.

 

-        "OK, let's go", she said. She said bye to Dylan, then Paul talked a few minutes with him and then it was my turn. I was so nervous again. Dylan seeing me with my dress all wet!!

 

-        "It's been a pleasure, Dylan", I offered him my hand for him to shake but he took it instead and kissed it.

 

-        "The pleasure's been mine. I'll write a song for you. You'll hear it", I was so amazed that I looked at John. He was very jealous so I didn't know how he would react. Surprisingly, the fact of being with Dylan made him dumb or something because he was smiling. I leaned to kiss him.

 

-        "Don't be long, John", I almost pleaded. He kissed me back but immediately he tunred to Dylan.  I started walking towards the front door after Paul and Edu but one last instinct made me turn around and have a last look at John. I saw the two beautiful but evil girls who had spilled their drinks on me walking towards the table where John, Bob Dylan and George were. I looked at John and saw him smile when the girls stood still at his side. I felt a lump in my throat and wanted to run towards John and stay with him. But someone passed before me and another one pushed me and I felt Edu's hand dragging me outside.

 

         We all jumped in Paul's Auston Martin. Edu and I were both in the backseat. Paul played "For Sale" in the car, but I was so sad that I didn't utter a word.

 

-        "Are you OK?", asked me Edu. I shook my head.

 

-        "No, I'm not! I hate leaving John alone, you know. Stupid girls!"

 

-        "Calm down, dear. Go home and rest. John will behave. Dylan is there, I don't think he'll pay much attention to the girls...", I looked at her. She wasn't very convinced and she knew she wasn't convincing me at all.

 

-        "No, I want to go back to the club. Paul...", Edu put a hand on my mouth and shut me up.

 

-        "Are you crazy or what? Look,  I hadn't realised but I'm tired so I'm going home".

 

-        "OK, you're going home, and I'm going back to the club".

 

-        "OK!", she said. "It's up to you!"

 

-        "Paul, drive Edu home, I'm going back to the club", I told Paul.

 

-        "What?"

 

-        "I'll tell you later. Please, drive Edu home".

 

         Paul didn't say anything else and did as we told him. When we reached Kinfanus, George and Edu's bungalow in Esher, she told me:

 

-        "I'd like to think you know what you're doing", and she closed the door of the car. Paul drove off again. In the middle of the way, I burst into tears. It was too much. I knew John would now be flirting with those girls and I wanted to die because John was the only thing I had and I loved him madly. Paul braked suddenly:

 

-        "What's the matter, luv?", he said, turning to me from the front seat. I sobbed.

 

-        "John doesn't love me".

 

-        "What?", he almost shouted. "Come on, luv!", he stopped the car. "Come here, come to the front seat with me". I obeyed. Maybe, there at the back I felt worse. "How can you say John doesn't love you? He's crazy about you!"

 

-        "How can you say so? Haven't you seen he's stayed there in the pub with those girls who were trying to get you at first?", Paul didn't respond and I knew he was thinking the same. He hugged me. That was a bad sign. Paul knew John too well and that he liked women a lot. He stroked my hair.

 

-        "Vicky, cheer up!", he told me. "Let me show you my new house, would you like that?", I didn't know he had a new house. Eli had told me he had been thinking of buying a house but I didn't know anything.

 

-        "Your new house?"

 

-        "Yes, I bought it last month. I didn't want to tell you girls anything, because I meant it to be a surprise, but this is a good moment", I felt better, and besides, I was thinking of giving John his own back. He was with those girls... I was with Paul.

 

-        "OK!", I said cheerfully. Paul looked at me and smiled.

 

-        "That's better, luv. You're lovely when you smile", then he started the engine and drove off. Nobody said a word during the almost an hour that the drive took. We drove past Abbey Road studios and a couple of streets away from Abbey Road, Paul stopped the car. I thought that maybe he wanted to do something there but then he took a remote control and opened the front gates of a house that lied before us. "This is it", he said.

 

-        "But it's quite near the studios", I told him.

 

-        "Yeah, I can't see why John and the others want to live so far away from them. We spent our lives either here or on tour, so there's no need to go so far away...", he was right. We entered and Paul parked the car. When I entered the house I saw it was still in need of being refurnished. "Well, the house needs some more things", he told me as though he had read my mind. He showed me the house 'round. It was very big, with a back garden. It had three floors but yes, it was unfurnished. We went down to what it was supposed to be the living room. Paul already had a sofa, a TV set, a table, some chairs and a bar. "Wanna something to drink?", he asked me. I nodded and he prepared two Scotchs with Coke. We sat down on the sofa. There was this terrible silence, so I thought I had to say something.

 

-        "So, what do you think about Dylan?", he shrugged.

 

-        "I like his music but personally John is more into him that the rest of us. Maybe George is also into him personally".

 

-        "He wouldn't stop calling me Magdalena", I said, smiling. "I thought John would jump any minute", his laughter was sarcastic.

 

-        "John wouldn't have done that to Dylan, not even though he had tried to rape you", I didn't like that.

 

-        "Why?"

 

-        "John is potty on Dylan. Maybe he needs to know him better to realise he's a human being. I don't know", I didn't say anything and Paul kept on drinking. Suddenly, the image of those girls flirting with John came to my head. I leaned my head onwards and looked at the floor. Paul came closer to me on the sofa. "You OK?", I nodded. He thought I was miserable because of what he had said about John. "Luv, that doesn't mean he doesn't love ya, although I would beat the shit out of him sometimes. "I lifted my head and looked at Paul dierctly in the eyes.

 

-        "Why?"

 

-        "Because of some things he does. But forget about that, you know... Another drink?", I nodded. I needed to drink becasue the thought of John with those girls made my mouth dry. We drank in silence until Paul told me: "I wrote some songs for you that will go on our next LP. John doesn't know anything", my head was in a whirl.

 

-        "Oh, Paul, you shouldn't have done that. John will find out sooner or later.", he came very close to me.

 

-        "That's what I want. I want him to find out, to see what he can lose if he doesn't treat you right", the alcohol was beginning to have its effects on me.

 

-        "He'll be fucking those girls now, won't he?", Paul came even closer to me. The alcohol maybe, made me see him really sexy. His long legs were right in front of me, his puppy green eyes were looking at me really fixedly and I felt weak in the knee. He grabbed me by the arms and lifted me up. He was taller than me, but still we looked at each other's eyes. I saw his mouth approaching mine and he whipered:

 

-        "I love you, Vicky, I'd never do what John does to you. I live for the day when you love me", the alcohol didn't let me think clearly. I felt aroused, as always happened to me when I drank. When Paul kissed me I knew what was going to happen. I let it happen. Holding me by the waist, Paul led me upstairs to his room. There he put me lying on my back on the bed and started undressing me. I was really hot and started unbottoning my skirt but Paul wouldn't let me. He wanted to do it himself. He took my boots out and unzipped my skirt. He pulled it down and took it out lifting my legs. He kissed my feet and licked my toes. I moaned. I was with my eyes closed because I felt really drunk. He went up, kissing my legs and my thighs, then he pulled my knickers down and kissed very very softly my womanhood. I moaned and opened my legs almost completely but Paul closed them softly. Then he proceeded to unbotton my shirt. He started from the bottom and kissed every part of my body that showed under the shirt. He kissed my belly, then my navel, then my stomach, then my tits and finally my neck. He took my shirt out and came to my mouth. He kissed my softly but didn't stop only on the mouth. He lifted my fringe with his left hand and kissed my front, my eyes, my nose, my ears, my cheeks... and my jaws. Then he went back to my mouth and kissed me a little bit more passionately. Then it was his turn. I was far too tired to undress him, so he did it himself. I tunred around and lied on the bed completely naked but face down. The alcohol had affected me more than I first thought. I heard some noises: Paul undressing. Finally, I felt him lying on top of me. I moaned. His dick was hard but he only kissed my cheek. I was very aroused:

 

-        "Oh, Paul... Make love to me...", I suppose I didn't know what I was saying but I've never been able to drink alcohol without being stupid.

 

-        "Shh", he said. "I'm not gonna make love to you", I was astonished. That had never happened to me before. Then, what was I doing there? What was he doing on top of me? I tried to turn around and face him but he wouldn't let me. "Look, luv, you're not yourself tonight. I'd never do that to you knowing you're not absolutely coonscious. I love you too much for that. Maybe John doesn't mind making love to you while you both are drunk, but not me", I found that explanation absolutely reasonable then in the state I was in. He kissed my head and stroked my hair. Smoothingly, he kissed my neck and went down kissing my spine. Then he stopped at my bottom. He opened it with his hands and licked it. I moved because I couldn't put up so much pleasure. He then turned me round and licked my toes, one by one, and bit my nails. Then he kissed and licked my legs, stopping at my knees and caressing my thighs. He licked me out for a couple of seconds and then went up to my belly. He showered it in kisses. He licked and kissd my navel, he tongued it a few times and went up. My stomach was covered with his warm saliva, he had licked it with his tongue until he reached my tits. He kissed my nipples really softly, with his lips. He finally kissed me on the mouth and lied there looking at the ceiling. I wanted to thank Paul for all the pleasure he had given me doing the same to him, but somehow I couldn't. I fell asleep.

 

         We both should have fallen asleep because when I woke up in a sudden jump, Paul was sleeping soundly at my side. I looked at my watch. Holy Christ!!! 6.30 am!!! I woke Paul up in panic. He also panicked when he realised John might be home by then. We got dressed in a few seconds and Paul drove me home.

 

         No one said a word during the whole way home. I was praying internally because if John had got home and I wasn't there, then it was the end.

 

         All the lights were off when Paul and I approached Kenwood. I didn't even said goodbye to Paul. I rushed inside the house. There was silence everywhere. I rushed upstairs towards the bedroom. It was empty. I sighed with relief. John hadn't arrived yet. I undressed and went into bed. But I hadn't fallen asleep yet when John came home. Oh, God! I even thought how come John and Paul hadn't crossed in the way.

 

-        "You sleeping, luv?", he whispered. He was drunk but I just prayed internally that the only thing he wanted was sleep. I moaned, pretending I was sleeping. So John kissed my head and lied on my side. He fell asleep before me, so far out he was. That night I promised myself that what I had done should never happen again. I was only grateful that John hadn't found out.

 

         The second highlight of the year was when John told me they were playing in Spain in July. When he told me, I was so glad that I started jumping and shouting for joy. This time, it was Edu who phoned me because they were actually playing in Barcelona, her hometown. We decided to go there a couple of weeks before the guys and then we would meet up with them the last day of their stay in Spain. Eli was also going to Spain. Of course, that was something any of us wouldn't miss.

 

-        "Yer glad, aren't ya, luv?", John told me. I smiled.

 

-        "John, you are playing Spain. People will go mad with you! And you'll see the lovely weather we've got there", John smiled too.

 

-        "I love seeing ya so happy. Ya know I love ye, don't ya?", I hugged him and gave him a soft kiss on the lips.

 

-        "And I love you too, John. More than I've ever loved anyone or I'll love".

 

-        "I'm so sorry that we had been arguing these past weeks, luv", he told me. Well, we had been arguing and angry at each other because John was suspicious of Paul.

 

-        "John, let's forget about that, OK? The important thing here is that we love each other a lot", John smiled and stroke my hair. He, then, whispered in my ear:

 

-        "I wanna make love to ya, babe. Now", I became aroused. I only needed a couple of words from John to become fire. I kissed his neck and John moaned, hanging his head backwards. I unbottoned his shirt and started kissing his chest. I licked it and went down to his lovely navel. I put my tongue into it while at the same time I unzipped his trousers and pulled them down. John had a tremendous hard-up. His dick wanted to break his underwear and I couldn't resist and without pulling it down I started biting his dick. John moaned louder and he held my head. "Where did ya learn to to this, luv?", well, there was no point in telling him I had done it with Paul for the first time. Oh, God! This thing with Paul had to finish. Now that John and I were so well and once again loved each other and seemed like a normal couple, I didn't want to spoil it all again.

 

-        "I love you", I told him for all answer. He then lifted me up and kissed me passinately in the mouth. Grabbing my ass, he directed me towards the bedroom, where he pushed me onto the bed. I lied on my back and I observed him while he pulled his underwear down. He leaned to me and started kissing me all over the face. He went down to my neck and in between kisses he told me:

 

-        "Now it's yer turn, my love", and he continued kissing me. He kissed my breasts and my stomach and then turned me around and put me face down on the bed. He kissed all my spine, making me moan. Then he lied on my side and made me rest on my side. He lifted up one of my legs and made love to me from one side. He kissed my head and my neck and I was so aroused that I couldn't even speak. Joh slid one of his hands on my side and caught one of my breasts. With the other, he caressed my belly and my legs. I came first. I loved John so madly that just to think he was making love to me so passionately made me explode. He lingered on inside me until he finally came. We both lied there so exhausted and breathing hard. Then I started remembering what Paul, Edu and so many others had told me about John. What could John possibly do on tour? If it was what I imagined, I would die. I loved John madly and that would be like a stab on my back. But, on the other hand, what was I doing? Wasn't I doing the same thing with Paul? "What are ye thinkin', babe?", John's voice brought me up to reality. I had to think fast so I said the first thing that came up to my head.

 

-        "Of Spain, John. Oh, I want to see my family so much! It's a pity that you're not playing Valencia...", John laughed.

 

-        "Edu will be glad, though. We're playing in her 'ometown", I turned to him and kissed him.

 

-        "John, I love you. You make me so happy. I never thought I would be so happy. Do you remember when we met? I had no idea who you were. And now you're one of the most famous men in the world", he laughed again.

 

-        "It takes its toll, though!"

 

-        "What do you mean?"

 

-        "Well, ye can see it fer yourself. Can you go out to the street without being recognised and mobbed? Why did we lose our baby? Because I'm famous and I'm getting a bit tired of this shit..."

 

-        "Oh, no, John, don't say that!", I couldn't think of John getting tired of being a Beatle, that was impossible. "Music is your life. You told me long ago, remember?", he kissed me.

 

-        "I'm not goin' to give up, luv", he said with that lovely smile he had. "Don't worry". The phone rang at that moment. I went to pick it but John was faster and picked it first. "'ello?", I got up and went to the bathroom to wash myself. It was late and I was tired, so I decided to go to bed. Quite surprisingly, John was getting ready.

 

-        "Where are you going?", I asked him in awe. He felt uneasy but answered.

 

-        "To the Ad Lib. Mike and Brian Stone are there and Ring and George are also going. The fucin' Macca is lately quite strange, but fuck him, ya see!", I was terrified to ask him if I could go with them. They were not very eager to socialise with women unless it were absolutely necessary but I tried:

 

-        "Can I go with you?"

 

-        "Well, none of yer friends are going and Anita and Marianne are not yer cup of tea, are they?", God! That was a NO. I wanted to cry. Since when hadn't John stopped wanting me with him? When had he started to change? Oh, God! That was not the John I had met. My eyes became wet and he noticed. "Luv, ye can come with me if ye want...", he said, coming to me and lifting my head with his lovely hand. That cheered me up a little but I didn't want it that way. I wanted it to have been John's idea. I shook my head.

 

-        "No, it's alright. Do go, John. I'll stay here and go to sleep".

 

-        "You sure?", he said. I nodded. He then kissed my head and went. The void I felt when John went can not be described here. I knew then I was losing John. It was too late to phone Edu or Eli. They would probably be sleeping and I hated (still do) being alone. George and Ringo were with John... Only Paul was left. I had been trying to avoid Paul since the last time we had been together. We hadn't been alone nor we had spoken. But John had told me Paul wasn't going to the Ad Lib and I must admit that, the farher I felt of John, the closer I felt to Paul. John was going away from me. I knew he still loved me but he was taking a different path, he was going in a different direftion. Paul was closer to me than John. I went to the telephone and dialed Paul's mumber:

 

-        "Hello?", I heard Paul say.

 

-        "Hi, Paul, it's Vicky... How are you?", stupid question at that time but I couldn't come up with anything more interesting to say.

 

-        "Vicky!", he almost shouted. He seemed surprised. No wonder. Then, I heard a femenine voice that I didn't recognise as Eli's.

 

-        "Who's Vicky, Paul?", my God! Paul was with a woman and I had interrupted them. Oh, no! I felt terrible, there was a mixture of jealousy, loneliness and misery all together. And I knew it wasn't Eli.

 

-        "Oh, I'm sorry, Paul", I said on the verge of tears. "I didn't know you were with somebody. Sorry". I wanted to hang up. And I did. The last thing I heard was Paul saying:

 

-        "Oh, Vicky, listen...", but I didn't want to hear any more. I wasn't Paul's. So he had the right to do what he pleased. Eli was my friend, but Paul wasn't controllable. And I shouldn't be jealous. I went to bed in a pool of sorrow. The phone started ringing and rang all along the night. I didn't pick it up. I fell asleep with the ringing phone near my ears.

 

         It was finally time to go to Spain. Edu and I had different flights. I was going to Valencia and she was going to Barcelona, so we said goodbye at home. The Beatles had already gone on tour. I was so excited to see my family. We had so many things to say to each other. My brother had done really well at school that year and my whole neighbourhood knew I was going out with a Beatle. I was quite famous. People who I had never seen befre came to see me and say hello to me. I was shocked. My dad, who had never liked John, was now quite proud of me and the only thing that my mum wanted was that John got a divorce and that I married him. I had explained to her thousands of times that Cyn wasn't very keen on giving him the divorce so the way things were going John and I couldn't get married for the time being.

 

         I spent some days with my family. My brother wanted to attend the Beatles concert in Madrid but I told him I wasn't going. I would join them in Barcelona so he insited on coming with me. I accepted. He would come with me on the train and would come back the next morning on a different train.

 

         I said goodbye to my parents and Charles and I went to Barcelona. We went to the hotel where they were staying. Edu was already there. I didn't find any difficulties at the entrance. Surprisingly, the porters either recognised me or John had told them something. The thing was that we could enter without any difficulties.

 

         I introduced my brother to everybody. Poor old charles was amazed at meeting the Beatles. He got on really well with them and pretty soon he was laughing at their jokes. John invited him to stay with us at Kenwood in July and he accepted. I don't know if John wanted to win points with me doing so, but I was happy.

 

         The concert was superb. I enjoyed it a lot, and besides I was home, so what else could I ask for?

 

         On the way back to England, John started complaining about his tooth again. The tour was over, so we decided that he would visit a dentist as soon as possible.

 

         In July, Charles came home as planned. John also invited his friend Pete Shotton. I was very keen on meeting his wife, Beth, but John wasn't very keen on having women at home (I don't know, he contradicted himself. He liked women so much, but then he kept on refusing them) so Pete came home on his own. I had talked to John because I didn't want my brother to feel isoleted or something and in the end everything was fine. John, Pete and Charles went parties and had fun.

 

         But John had kept on complaining about his tooth, so, when Charles and Pete went home, I insisted on John going to the dentist. He finally gave in. It was nothing in the end, he had a filling, but from that visit to the dentist came the beginning of the end of our relationship.

 

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