The Make-over Mafia

Before going any farther, I do want to clarify; I'm not talking about the old fashioned style articles where a woman who was entering the workforce for the first time in 10 years is shown which hair colours look natural on her and how to pluck her eyebrows and such things. These fashion designers used to consult the client as to personal preferences and asked exactly what goals the person had for their wardrobe. The people who came from these make overs were still dressed in a manner which suited their own personal style but it was fine tuned to suit whatever goals they had. Hair which was lifeless and greying would be shiny, coloured and styled. Clothes which did not fit properly were replaced with clothes of similar styling which did. Women were shown how to build a business wardrobe which they felt reflected the styles they wore at home. I'm also not talking about taking a guy to a men's store and showing him how to pick shirts which go with his complexion so he has the option of wearing something other than t-shirts so long as he is given the choices as to what is chosen.

However, the new modus operundi of most of the new shows and articles consists of an unsuspecting individual being "volunteered" by well-meaning family and friends to be made over because they don't approve of the way the person dresses and looks. They are given luxury treatments and a new wardrobe, but rules include allowing the fashion experts free reign over all hairstyles and colours, disposal of the previous wardrobe (in very few cases some items are kept) and allowing a team of fashionistas to either purchase or approve of purchases made on the behalf of the makeover victim. It's sort of like having Monster House come in and take over your closet and body. And over and over again I see the same pathetic patterns.

"Frumpy" housewives are poured into business casual apparel even though they do not work and nothing in their past wardrobe even indicates they *like* that style to begin with. They are not asked what their fashion preferences and goals are, they do not ask what colours they prefer. They are told that jeans or sweats or jumpers leave them looking tired, frumpy, dated or in some other way unacceptable. Men who prefer a sporty, low maintenance look are stuffed into dress pants and oxford shirts even if after work is the only time they need a wardrobe. Delicate, romantic types are "updated" into more classic, streamlined clothing. Any man with long or facial hair faces the clippers and women always end up with a short, "modern" cut even when they are one step short of being Amish or protest they do not like themselves with short hair. I'm not even going to get into what they would attempt to do to Lady Raven's wardrobe.

No thought is given to the person's preferences, tastes and choices: the premise is that they are incapable of dressing themselves or the fashion experts would not have been summoned in the first place. Can someone tell me what is wrong with a bearded man or a woman with long tresses? Why are lacy, Victorian blouses less valued than regular button down types? Why is a turtle-neck more "holy" to the fashion gods than t-shirts? If a person is nice enough to go along with a makeover, the fashionistas should respect the person before them and make any adjustments to the wardrobe with this individual in mind. Perhaps man before you looks like he stepped out of LL Bean. Obviously making him look like a corporate raider is an assault on his personality, no? Why not instead show him what clothing within his preferences work best with his skin tones, which pants within his style preferences would look best during which activities and how to "adjust" them to make them go where they normally would not, like perhaps the office? Why not show a feminine/romantic how to pair normal "office wear" with a few pieces which she will feel comfortable in so that she feels good about her own personal style? Why not expose gothic types to the various styles which can be worn in a "professional" situation rather than attempt to dress them in bright green business suits?

Another thing that is bothersome about these new style shows is that family and friends would pressure someone into changing their personal style by sending out for the "professionals" in the first place. So much for unconditional love and respecting the sanctity of the individual. If someone in your family is colour blind, help them work through it, don't call the fashion police or pick on them. If you think your great aunt is preoccupied with 1985, maybe she is. Why not love her that way rather than trying to take away her big hair, big sweaters and stirrup pants? Maybe she felt most alive, most like herself in 1985 and this is truly who she is.

My family, gentle reader, has been warned. Signing me up for such a thing (though it is a true thing I would love to have $3-5,000 to purchase new apparel) would be cause for all manner of interpersonal strife. Unless someone were to find me an alternative fashion designer it is a sure thing there is little chance this makeover would please me at all. Instead it would be the ultimate rejection since my outward appearance reflects my own inner self more and more with each encounter with the sewing machine or cash register. Why not respect people or leave them alone?

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