Interview with Harry Chapin

  Welcome ladies and gentlemen! Today we will be doing a very special sort of interview, a seance. We will be attempting to contact Harry Chapin, a world renown musical artist and, in my humble opinion, a damn fine human being.
  To perform the seance, I've invited psychic John Edward, best known for his ability to communicate with "the other side". Also joining us will be two of Mr. Chapin's biggest fans, Dan K. and Mike B. ( they have requested their real names not be used due to legal reasons ).
Image snagged from
www.harrychapin.com
We had to obtain an object belonging to Mr. Chapin in order to do this interview, so we decided on (or more to the point, could only get our hands on ) one of his guitar picks. Now, we already have everything set up and ready to go, but just to give you an idea of how we did this, I'm going to give you a brief description of the room... We're sitting at the table, John's to my right and Dan's on my left. We have the guitar pick in the middle of the table with candles on both sides of it. The room is completely dark except for the candles and the only noise is the sound of me talking into the microphone.
  So with that, we'll begin...


RT: OK, is everyone comfortable?

DK: Yes.

MB: Yes.

JE: Yes.

RT: Let's get started then, shall we? John... it's all you, buddy.

JE: Everyone, please hold hands...

RT: Oops, hold on... I didn't know we had to hold hands. Trade me seats
       Dan, I don't want to hold his hand.

                << Shuffling  noises as we all get reorganized >>

RT: There, that's better. John?

JE: << Evilly glaring at me >> Now, I want you all to clear your minds
      and concentrate on the guitar pick in the middle of the table... think
      of Harry Chapin and concentrate.

RT: Umm... wait, do you want me to clear my mind, or concentrate on
       the guitar pick?

JE: Just shut up and concentrate...

       << As we concentrate on the guitar pick, it starts glowing with an
         unearthly light. John's eyes are now closed, he is humming softly
          while swaying back and forth. >>

JE: Harry, Harry... are you with us?

  << Not a sound, but the candles around the guitar pick are flickering >>
JE: Can you hear me Harry?

   << The light from the candles is whirling around with the weird light
      coming from the guitar pick and John's head is now back  as though
      he is looking at something on the ceiling, but his eyes still appear to
      be closed. He lets out a big gasp >>

JE: << In a voice that none of us recognizes >> Who are you and why
      are you calling my name?

RT: << Sounding a bit startled and whispering to Dan >> Oh my gosh, is
       it him?

DK: << Whispering back >> I don't know, say something to him.

RT: << Still whispering >> I'm not going to say anything, You say
       something to him.

DK: << Also still whispering >> I'm not saying anything. Wait, I know...
       let's get Mikey, he'll say Anything!

RT & DK: << Whispering to Mikey >> Say something, Mikey.

MB: Harry, is that you?

JE: << In a deep, eerie voice >> Yes.... why have you awoken me?

MB: We're sorry for disturbing you, but you are one of our heroes and
       we just wanted to ask you a few questions...

JE: << Sounding oddly interested >> Hero? You don't say.... Well go
       ahead then, ask me your questions.

RT: What's it like on the other side, Harry?

JE: To be quite honest, it's kind of boring... << The Voice, sounding a bit
      dreamy >> What I wouldn't give for a cheeseburger right now.

DK: Harry, what would you be doing today if you hadn't died?

JE: Oh, I suppose I would still be doing my illusions... although, I suspect
      I would be too old to do most of them now.

DK: Excuse me? Illusions?

JE: Yes, illusions... you know, magic tricks.

RT: Harry Chapin?

JE: Who?

RT: Harry Chapin? Aren't you the singer that did "Cats in the Cradle?"

JE: No, I'm Harry Houdini... Illusionist extraordinair!

RT: Oh wow, this is embarrassing.... we were looking for Harry Chapin.

JE: << Thoughtfully >> Harry Chapin, Harry Chapin.... Oh Wait! I know
     who you're talking about now... he's the music director for the
     Heavenly Choir! Hang on, I'll see if  I can find him...

           << We sit there looking at each other in amazement >>

JE: I'm sorry, Harry's really busy today preparing for a concert tonight.
     Think you could come back tomorrow?

RT: Umm...

JE: Oh wait, I keep forgetting the time difference... In Your time, can
      you come back in a thousand years?

MB: Sure we will....

JE: OK, I'll tell Harry to be expecting you. Was there anything else?

RT: No... I think that should do it. Thank You so much for your time
      and for relaying the message for us Mr. Houdini.

JE: Not at all, you have a nice day.

RT: Thank you, you too.

    << Everything just went dark! Oh wait, the candles are starting to
      flicker back to life. I can tell by the look on Dan and Mikey's faces
      that they are as stunned as I am. >>

MB: Is he gone?

DK: I think so.

        << John sounds as though he has awoken from a dream >>

JE: What happened? Was he here?

DK: << Glaring at me >> Yeah, he was here all right.

MB: << Also glaring at me >> Yeah, he was here. I just wonder how we
      got the wrong Harry.

RT: << Now backing away from the table >> Hey! Don't blame me! You
     guys wanted me here... I couldn't help it! When I think of seances
     and Harrys, Houdini naturally comes to my mind... What are you
     doing? Hey! Let go of me!

             << More shuffling sounds and loud screams >>

JE: Hey you guys, maybe we should turn this mic off now.

RT: Nooooo.....

                                    << Click >>
I would like to thank Mr. K for all his help on putting this interview together...
You Rock Dan!
Please Note: Once again, this is a Mock Interview. A figment my imagination and a product of having way to much time on my hands. If I have offended anyone, I sincerely apologize.
Thank You.

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