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Poems:
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Maybe I'm crazy for talking to the silence again and cause I still reach out for you every now and then All I have left is a note written with a dead pen I guess you never know what's waiting for you around the bend By making you my world, I took the plunge I used to think "somethin's gotta give" I never knew how much you would take My human sponge How do you deal with the choices you make If the eyes are a window into the soul, how can I see when the shades are down Salt water, rising up I begin to drown I wonder what will happen now that I'm a Queen without a crown Maybe I'll just drift along Stop livin' through you and find my own song
The red haired beauty has left the stage Though it is dark where she once was, the sound of her voice is still ringing softly in my ear, like a tinkling silver bell Don't go He's trying to walk beside me Stumbling, he lashes out at inanimate objects Then as if he's been woken up, he realizes I'm there I'm beaten by slurred words I wish I was with that sweet beauty Closing my eyes, I can see her at the piano Straddling the bench Swaying provocatively Her fiery locks turning into an out of control blaze The notes drifting then suddenly flying through the air The rumbling of the midnight train forces me back He's talking at me "people come and people go, but I don't care cause I'll always be here so if you leave I wont cry" So I did I don't know if he cried but I know I did And I had to look back and wonder What will become of us My guess is that the red haired beauty will continue to charm the world He'll go on poisoning himself and soon leave the world And me, I'll go on and try to find my place in the world Wondering if I'll ever see her again It's easy to miss someone you don't even know
Our dirty secret I'll take to my grave In a dark coner of my mind I'll bury the false affection you gave I know your still pretending to be noble and brave Now I see with guilty eyes I know what it means to truly despise One will laugh while the other cries Hiding behind the shadow of a lie Half truth explanations Leave no expectations My hands tied by complication There's no chance for communication Now you will see with guilty eyes You'll know what it means to truly despise One will laugh while the other cries Hiding behind the shadow of a lie Look closely and you will see an infinite scar that is forever a part of me. I know you said this is the way it has to be Now we will see with guilty eyes We'll know what it means to truly despise We both will laugh We both will cry We're both hiding behind the shadow of a lie
I close my eyes and silently pray "Please don't let me be dreaming" Slowly my eyes open to his He's so close "May I?' I ask With trembling fingers I reach for his hand I kiss it For a second we're still. Leaning towards me He whispers "may I?" His lips become part of mine His hands in my hair My heart in his hands He caresses my face "Don't let this end"
I'll never get to read what was meant for only her eyes to see. I guess I'll settle for reading what was meant for his eyes only But in my world his eyes are mine Somehow that doesn't seem to justify this invasion of privacy Maybe I'm just tired of feeling like I don't belong Always hanging out in the cold If I could just get my hands on a key A key to unlock the Golden Gate that's holding the sun captive Then would I become a part of that oh-so happy little circle of friends California here I come But I'm almost positive that I'll still be here My face pressed to the glass On the outside looking in when tomorrow rolls around
The smell of Honeydew Melon reminds me of you
and of times long ago
when the days would pass in a carefree blur
with nothing of importance to do
I called you Prescott
even though that wasn't your name
I drank a toast to the sun
under a moonlit sky
And tried to battle time
knowing it would always win the war
With each "tick" a leaf would turn
after every "tock" one would
Fall
Change . . .
A snow white blanket hid what was really on the surface
The icicles began to drip
The ground started to thaw
Outside it was getting warm but on the inside, I was still cold
I tried to stay away
but I found you hard to resist
I didn't want to see what wasn't there anymore
It was just to much to ignore
I can't pretend you're not a part of me
and I can't bring those days back
but, sometimes I wish that I could
I'm gonna fly away with a thousand balloons And go right over the moon To a world where things wont be ruined What a world my world will be I'll sit under the shade of a candycane tree And lick my fingers after pulling them from a honey sea I'll make a wish and it will come true I'll wish that this stranger will go back to being you
Last night you were mine, all mine No one else's ears were rewarded by the sound of your laughter No one else's eyes were blessed I waited so patiently Watching your baby pink colored lips, form soft whispery words I don't know how I resisted tasting them, right then and there Maybe it's because your words are magic They can enslave, just like those sea-green eyes You become quiet But your eyes speak a thousand words I know what you're thinking And knowing that, starts me thinking "how did I get so lucky. What have I done to deserve this?" Absolute pleasure You take my breath with your lips My abstract girl with fiery locks perform for me tonight
There was an almost inaudible buzz echoing through a small town one spring afternoon A heaviness in the air seemed to be forcing the leaves on the trees to hang down a bit lower than usual I strained my ears to hear what Mother Nature was trying to say Noon Bells began to ring Time was still ticking away for me But on the other side of town it had stopped for another He was too tired to go on So he layed his head down on the tracks and said "good night."
Yesterday, while I was on the bus a familiar scent came in through the open window and whirled around me While my heart was settling into its new home in my stomach, my brain made the connection It was you Some how, your scent from wherever you have disappeared to, had found its way over to me I couldn't help thinking "if that can get here, why can't you?" Remembering what it felt like to have you close to me I allow myself to ingest the stickiness You always smelt like honey, to me I close my eyes hoping the wind will carry me away That it will lift me right out of my seat and blow me into your arms But the only thing that carries me away, are memories It's Spring time I can see us walking down that quiet back street, that lead to your house Sunshine was starting to peek through the clouds The rain had stopped but little droplets that had collected on the leaves of trees were dripping down,landing on our heads We laughed and kicked our sandals off Making a game out of it Trying to see who could get theirs to land the furthest I slipped on a slick manhole cover You helped me get back on my feet We walked the rest of the way with your arm around me I thought that was the meaning of pure happiness Pure happiness, was your touch The feel of your bare skin on mine
they say it takes 30 days to break a habit well i dont believe that 17 years later i walked into my sisters apartment smiling as i watch my niece who is on the living room floor playing with elmo and cookie monster dolls And my sister says "i have something to tell you" i feel my facial muscels begining to twitch and i know it's making my smile flicker on and off like a letter on a neon sign with a light bulb that's about to blow out "daddy's been drinking again" my bag falls out of my hand spilling its contents i hear my keys hit the floor the sound intensified about a 1000 decibles my Tori Amos keychain breaks and then i am 6 years old crying in my first grade classroom alone with my teacher the other kids are at lunch time recess and i say "my daddy had to go away because he can't not drink" she hugs me and takes an E.T. keychain out the top draw of her desk I had wanted one for so long they were reserved for when someone did something exceptionally good my mom shows up shortly after and i go to the cubbyholes in the coat room gathering my things while they whisper after 17 years i never thought this day would come back at my sisters apartment i begin to cry why? what the hell happened? is he crazy? what's going to happen?
A mother to repair damage A lover to ravage A dark haired beauty to scoop me up in her arms A place of pleasure & safe from harm And we two could twist into one I'll let her unravel me until I come undone
i watch the stars come out in your eyes i feel the sun burning on your lips when they touch mine the hazy clouds come rolling in i can't think, can't breathe with out you i can't live this cosmic love echos through time near or far i feel your pull it takes me places i'v never been where your eyes guide me and i never want to leave my love is soft and evenly spaced like the rain dripping with emotion your body, my blanket protects me, warms me and when you touch me this cosmic love echos through time near or far i feel your pull it takes me places i'v never been where your eyes guide me and i never want to leave I can't think. can't breathe with out you i don't want to live i watch the stars come out in your eyes feel the sun burning on your lips this cosmic love this cosmic love
the very thought of you used to make my mind grow hazy i couldn't find my way back to the me i used to be but if i had just stopped to think it all would have been so clear, so easy to see you're the hurting kind dangerous to the heart you take with out realizing and discard with out warning i have been running in circles inside tripping on emotions finding myself back at the start retracing all the steps looking for that moment when things got sour i can't find the breaking point but ican feel it in your absence i didn't know you were the hurting kind dangerous to the heart you take with out realizing and discard with out warning take me back to the time when you were mine take me back to the time when we were as one take me back just take me back the very thought of you has me paralized has my heart pounding in my stomach has me filled with emptiness i remember you in the night i see your reflection in the tears that fall i remember you the hurting kind you took all of me and you left without a warning
One by One I watched the stars fall from the sky Desolate, scared to befriend the darkest night Falling stars . . . . How can this be Why? Then parting the darkness a golden light Standing before me a sight too beautiful to be true The stars were now a crown that lay gently on her head Looking at me with heavenly eyes a million shades of blue she kissed me softly and said "never give in to fear. it will be alright. find your wings and you will fly you'll be a star. you'll shine so bright."
I knew the nights of sitting on the floor encircled with broken glass and half empty bottles while I listened to you tell your tales were numbered But I loved you anyway And all to soon you were gone Leaving me with nothing but a mental picture of your baby fine blonde hair and sky blue eyes that seemed to have lightning flashes in them Not knowing where you are I wander aimlessly I look up at the buildings towering over me and wonder if a light coming from one of the many windows is yours Have you made a new life for yourself with a thousand admiring eyes following your every move? Or is Jack Daniels still your favorite companion? After nights of dreaming of you I wake up empty Looking closely and carefully at my skin hoping to find some remnants of your touch But I never do because I know you touched deeper than the surface.
Who are you? A woman strong self assured If that's what's presented how is it you can look in the mirror and not like what is relected? Where are you going? where have you been? Memories are they really what once existed or just what you wished Broken bits of glass to match pieces of a broken heart Pick them up Toss them over your shoulder Better luck next time Who are you? a little girl playing games toying with emotions Cling to your lover as a child would to mothers skirt How far would you fall if you let go? How far would you fly?
She's standing right infront of me I do not move I do not blink I don't even dare breathe I just stare Knowing that I have to touch her, just once Gathering my courage I speak of my desire Feeling her eyes on me I blush Butterflies begin to flutter in my belly She moves closer and her arms go around me Her rose colored ringlets brush against my cheek As I wrap my arms around her I feel how delicate this intimidating woman who speaks in magical metaphores really is " I love you" I whisper as she slips away
I know you're not coming out to play (with me) anymore There's not going to be anyone knocking on my door I have a feeling it's never going to be the way it was before I waste my precious time wondering why nothing ever stays the same Start pointing fingers and looking around for someone to take the blame While trying to figure out the rules to this losing game When somebody is standing right infront of you It's hard to admit they are gone It's obvious that you are running form who you are Don't you think it's time to come back because you have gone to far I bet I'll get over it Another lesson learned It just hurts knowing when you said I sparkled It was only a prelude to the burn
There's something about him I'm not sure what it is though Maybe it's the way he sits so quietly in the corner of a small town diner smiling occasionally Almost as if he is inviting me into his world for a moment I watch him paint his eyes made of blue and green They could put the most beautiful sea to shame With one glance he can pull me under God, I wish I could drown in them When he talks to me I block out all other sound If he is not in earshot I watch his lips think about his voice Its tone and the adorable accent on certain words Then I start to think "if he could read my mond he would die laughing" What do I have to offer him Someone who has everything already Could he possibly be lonely? Does he want someone to hold him? Would he let that someone be me? I wonder what it would be like to run my fingers through his hair kiss him and have him above me I learned it's not something about him It's everything about him I want it all But I'm to scared to take a step closer I'm afraid if I do he'll take a step away
I've tasted her sweetness many times It makes me wake up licking my lips Craving more I can see her She's out on the front porch Sitting in that decrepid rocking chair Her bare shoulders and delicate slender arms make the shot gun look out of place With one leg slung over the arm rest her skirt creeps up her thigh I tilt my head hoping for a better view Upon realizing that my face grows warm and i'm postive my legs are going to give out on me Even with mud caked on her bare feet and trailing up one knee she's exquisite Does she look this way just to make me ache? I inhale deeply then shakily breathe out her name
Sometimes I drift away to a castle in the clouds Where words don't exist But most of the time I'm trapped in reality In a debilitating house in the bronx listening to you recite my short comings
The sky breaks And if I believed I would swear the heavens are weeping for the loss of me My heart held together by strings Will soon break into tiny fragments that you'll scatter, stomp and keep a secure hold on I know it had to be that January night You came into me like an angry gust of wind through an open window Leaving behind a bone chilling cold and something that now burrows deep within That soon will split me in two A memory
Joey where have all the good men gone? The kind who come bearing flowers and their souls What ever happened to modesty, humility and humanity? Where is my "king of diamonds?" I'm still waiting for the one who can slide in and bring it home
There are times that i think life is a lot like a cigarette Burning away to quickly And when it's over and done with I'll want another
So many days of nothing Leaves me to lay On an unmade bed To lazy to speak and almost Having no desire to even breathe
A song comes on the radio I hear about people playing games and wishing to turn back time And I know that if I could I would be the one who is breaking you Because you started out by fucking me But I'm sure you will finish me off by fucking me over
Under a redlight I watch you sleep While I'm having big dreams of you and me I take in the black and blue strands spilling over the side of the mattress Your perfectly arched eyebrows Almond shaped eyes, colorless cheeks and slightly parted lips Under a redlight I think about touching you My hand creeps closer For a moment it is suspended in mid air My fingers brush your forehead A soft sigh Under a red light I feel muself growing warm Anticipation wrapping itself around me I press my mouth to your ear whisper your name Under a red light I hear my heart pounding As you stir then slowly open your eyes Smiling together we kiss Under a red light
Her hair is a mess of tangled apple colored corkscrews Clothes clinging, skin slick and moist from perspiration As she writhes and wiggles I'd kill to be that piano bench Her breath comes hard and hot while letting out primal screams that die into moans Although she does this for a roomfull of thousands For one glorious moment I loose myself It's just me and her She's singing to me only  NOTE: These pages and their contents are the sole property of Nanci Wilson, who retains all rights and trademarks. These pages and the material that resides therein can not be copied, duplicated, distributed, or used in any way, for profit or not for profit, without the explicit written permission of the author. |