Memorial Civil War

SSB MELEE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP-     &      VS       &
Ryan: We are now live at Great Bay!
Jeff: This'll be good!
Ryan: We have not seen the Tag Team titles on the line for a very long time. And it is on the line today! The superstars are now entering!
(A new version of the Lost Woods is playing! Young Link enters!) (new theme)
Jeff: The following contest is scheduled for 1 stock and is for the SSB Melee Tag Team Championships! Introducing first from Kokiri Forest, weighing at 60 pounds, Young Link!
Ryan: Young Link is a beginner who debuted 2 months ago. He could become 1/2 of the Tag Team Champions, which would be his first championship belt!
(Techno music is playing. The crowd is booing! Pikachu enters!)
Jeff: And his Tag Team partener from Veridian Forest, weighing at 14 pounds, Pikachu! Awesome enterance attire also!
Ryan: Pikachu is probably the most dominate superstar in the lightweight division. I believe he trains the newcomers!
(The new version of F-Zero X Mute City is playing! Captain Falcon & Samus enter!)
Jeff: And their opponents representing the NWO, at a combined weight of 420 pounds, they are the SSB Melee Tag Team Champions, Captain Falcon and Samus Aran!
Ryan: It's been a very long time since Captain Falcon's been in the ring. He & Samus have been the Tag Team Champions since November!
(The Bell Rings!)
Jeff: Everyone's lookin good! All are fighting!
Ryan: Young Link with a Spinning Slash on Captain Falcon! And Pikachu with a Thunder on Samus! The match is turning to these two! Amazing!
Jeff: Everyone is still fighting! Bam! Pow! Ouch! Ka-pow! Oof!
Ryan: I get the picture.
Jeff: Young Link is taking Samus out!
Ryan: Pikachu was the one who ended Captain Falcon's career as a Superhero, remember?
Captain Falcon: (aiming towards Pikachu) FALCON KICK!
Jeff: CAPTAIN FALCON IS FALLING UNDERWATER! OH! He just barely got back in the ring!
Ryan: Someone's gonna fall. That turtle is sinking underwater.
Jeff: Young Link is stealing Link's moves! There's the Wild Ride attack!
(Samus scares Young Link! Young Link falls backward & falls underwater!)
Young Link: AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!! (falls out of the ring & is underwater! The crowd is laughing!)
Jeff: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!!! That was so funny! Young Link is now eliminated! Samus scared him out of the ring! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!! That'll be the "SSB Slam of the Week" right there!
Ryan: Now it's all up to Pikachu, who is being doubleteamed!
Jeff: He's busted open & everything! He's gettin beaten up in there!
Ryan: Thunder onto Samus! But Captain Falcon & Samus are both angry! They're gonna finish Pikachu off!
Jeff: Piakchu with an Electric Drop on both of them!
Ryan: CAPTAIN FALCON WITH A FALCON DIVE!!!
Jeff: CAPTAIN FALCON'S FALLING AGAIN! Aw, man! He's still in!
Ryan: Pikachu's puttin up a good fight.
Jeff: Samus accidently attacked Captain Falcon! She hit her boyfriend on accident! Now Pikachu sent Samus flying with an Electric Shock!
(Samus comes back down and sends Pikachu flying)
Captain Falcon: I'm gonna slam dunk you! (Pikachu evades! Captain Falcon misses & falls underwater! However, he gets back in)
Jeff: Captain Falcon is cheating! Disqualify him!
Ryan: Samus got a Pokeball. It's Marril.
Jeff: No effect. Pikachu is just hangin in there & is still putting up a good fight.
Ryan: WHOA!!! Pikachu sent both of the Tag Team Champions flying!
Jeff: Samus is almost gone! I thought she was done right there!
Ryan: Pikachu is just on fire! He's taking out 2 people at once!
Jeff: Captain Falcon is a former superhero and he is getting his ass beat!
Ryan: Samus is setting bombs everywhere!
(Captain Falcon & Samus start doubleteaming Pikachu & are both punching him! Samus then hits Pikachu with her gun and Pikachu fell underwater!)
Ryan: Captain Falcon & Samus did it! They win!
Jeff: Here are your winners and still the SSB Melee Tag Team Champions, Captain Falcon & Samus Aran!
Ryan: We are so sick of them retaining their titles! When will they ever lose those titles?
(Samus takes off her helmet and the two kiss each other in the ring & then leave with the Tag Team titles!)
Jeff: Samus has blonde hair. Last year she had brown. Now she looks even hotter! YEAH!!!
Ryan: Yeah, whatever. Well what a day it has been so far! And there is more to come! Coming up is an another Tag Team Match! It's Fox McCloud & a newcomer verses Marth & a newcomer! And it's coming up next!
Captain Falcon: How do you like it, Pikachu?! Ha! (leaves w/ Samus)
(Commercial Break)

Tag Team Match-        & NEWCOMER vs          & NEWCOMER
Ryan: Now we are live at Venom! And we just saw moments ago, Captain Falcon & Samus Aran retained their Tag Team titles over Pikachu & Young Link at Great Bay!
Jeff: It's a Beautiful day, ain't it? That's what U2 says!
Ryan: Yeah, about 70 degrees out. Well for those of you who just joined us, this is Memorial Civil War, the biggest Pay Per View of the year!
Jeff: Just like Wrestlemania!
Ryan: Well Marth & Fox McCloud have been having major problems with each other ever since Marth made his debut here in SSB Melee.
Jeff: Marth said he was gonna take out each & every member of the NWO one by one! He already took out Samus a few weeks ago, now Fox McCloud is next!
Ryan: And they're settling it right here, at Memorial Civil War.
(Godsmack's "Awake" is playing! Marth & a young guy with red hair both enter!)
Jeff: Who is that with Marth?
Michael Buffer: The following contest is scheduled for 1 stock. Making their way to the ring both from Tokyo, Japan, at a combined weight of 310 pounds, Marth and SSB Newcomer: ROY!
Jeff: Roy? Looks more like Gary Oak to me!
Ryan: Marth said his Tag Team partener was his long time best friend from Japan! And his friend is Roy! They look like an unstoppable team just seeing those swords!
(A song with trumpets is playing! The titantron says "Super Smash Bros presents...")
Jeff: What the--?
(the titantron then says "a Star Fox production")
Ryan: Star Fox? That doesn't sound good for Marth & Roy.
(THE TITANTRON SAYS "FOX & FALCO" as Fox McCloud enters with a blue Falcon!)
Jeff: Who is that with Fox?
Buffer: And their opponents, representing the NWO, at a combined weight of 350 pounds, Fox McCloud and SSB Newcomer: FALCO LOMBARDI!
(Fox & Falco are at the top of the ramp to the ring. They go back to back with each other with their arms crossed, and they are staring right at Marth & Roy!)
Ryan: Falco has not been seen in nearly 5 years! What an innovation for him to debut here in SSB Melee!
Jeff: Their enterance is like a movie theme!
Fox: Hey Marth! Meet us! The Star Fox Team! We are the MOVIE STARS of SSB Melee! How do you like our enterance video? Well everybody in the crowd better roll their cameras! Because this match will be ONE GREAT MOVIE!
(Fox & Falco run into the ring as the bell rings!)
Jeff: Let's see how great this "movie" is!
Ryan: Fox & Marth are going at it! Falco and Roy are going at it as well!
Jeff: Fox with a Powerslam onto Marth!
Ryan: Everybody is fighting!
Jeff: Nice background, huh?
Ryan: This match is all Fox & Falco! Both Marth & Roy are getting their ass beaten!
Jeff: Look at the strength of Fox McCloud! He's lifting Marth! That's a Military Press!
Ryan: Fox is a very strong guy, I'll tell you that.
Jeff: Man, all the fighting in this match is between Fox & Marth! Do something over there, Falco or Roy!
Ryan: Fox is really beating Marth down! Falco is being aggressive over Roy right now!
Jeff: I think Marth is looking tired.
Ryan: Falco is just all over Roy! As well as Fox over Marth!
Jeff: THERE IT IS! FOX'S FINISHER! THE SPINNING HEEL KICK!
Ryan: Marth is completely out!
Fox: Stay out of my sight! (sends Marth flying)
Ryan: Marth is losing it.
Jeff: Has no energy left!
(Everyone is all in one pile all attacking each other!)
Jeff: WHOA! Falco sends Roy flying! Fox sends Marth flying!
Ryan: I thought Marth was done right there! He nearly was KOed. Not done yet.
Fox: HIYA!!! (Fox hits Marth with a Flipping Kick very hard!)
Marth: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!
Jeff: YES!!! WHOO-HOO!!! Marth is eliminated!
Ryan: And Roy's been getting a beating already by Falco throughout the whole match!
Fox: Let's finish him off!
Falco: You're dead, Roy!
(Fox gets a cloacking device as they both destroy Roy! Roy gets KOed!)
Roy: AAAAAAHHHH!!!!!
Ryan: It's over! Fox & Falco win the match!
Fox & Falco: MISSION COMPLETE!!! (both leave as their theme music plays!)
Fox: And that is how the movie goes!
Jeff: You tell them, Fox!
Ryan: Well the NWO gave Marth a payback! Falco is now in the NWO as well!
Jeff: What a great movie! 4 Stars!
Ryan: Yeah. Well we are getting SO CLOSE to the Double Main Event! Up next, the Intercontinental title is on the line! Yoshi vs Kirby in a big Hardcore Match! Next!
(near the parking lot outside, a giant black pick-up truck with a fire design on it's hood is arriving!)
Ryan: Who could this be?
Jeff: Giant wheels.
(The door opens and BOWSER comes out! The crowd goes nuts!)
Ryan: Uh oh, it's Bowser! He has arrived at Memorial Civil War! He is making his way to the arena. He will be facing Donkey Kong in one of the main events today!
Jeff: I can't wait!
(Commercial Break)

(The camera is backstage. The Gooma is interviewing Ganondorf! The crowd goes nuts!)
Goomba: Ganondorf, listen to these people! They all hope you become the next SSB Melee Champion!
Ganondorf: SILENCE!!! This match against Link is not about what the people think! Either way, I will become the next SSB Melee Champion! You know, you always see Link...always gotta bring that Zelda with him all the time! I don't care who the hell Link is, I don't care how long he's had that SSB title, and I don't care if he is the leader of the NWO! This match is going to be nothin' but 1-sided! I just heard that Link is not allowed to have anyone accompanying him in the match! As I said earlier this month, I will KILL him today! Link is going out to the ring alone! There will be no Zelda, there will be no NWO, just ME and LINK! And Link, just remember: when I kill you & become the new SSB Champion, rest in peace! (leaves as the crowd is cheering!)

SSB MELEE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP-      vs
Jeff: Oh boy! We are so close to our Double Main Event! I can't wait! Whoo-hoo!
Ryan: Well we have moved to Corneria! We just saw in Venom, Fox & Falco demolished Marth & Roy! What a debut Falco has made here at Memorial Civil War!
Jeff: Well how 'bout this match coming up?
Ryan: Yes. This next match is a rematch from August 8th, 1999! It was a big 10 minute Hardcore Ironman Match between Kirby & Yoshi! Well this is a rematch! It will be bloody, violent, and this time, Yoshi's Intercontinental title is on the line!
Jeff: I know inside that Yoshi will wreck havoc today!
(Yoshi's Story Breakbeat Inferno is playing as the crowd is cheering! Yoshi enters with his IC title and a microphone!)
Jeff: The following contest is a Hardcore match, scheduled for 1 fall and is for the SSB Melee Intercontinental Championship! Making his way to the ring from Yoshi's Island, weighing at 110 pounds, he is the SSB Melee Intercontinental Champion, Yoshi!
(Yoshi poses and fireworks fly)
Ryan: Yoshi is gonna face Kirby for his Intercontinental title. What a match this will be!
Jeff: And we'll never forget that 10 minute Hardcore Ironman match between these 2 back in August 1999! Nearly 3 years ago!
Ryan: And look at both of them now. They are STILL rivals! Yoshi & Kirby have had alot of history together. And today might be the Final Showdown! The Intercontinental title is on the line!
Jeff: Quiet! The IC Champ is speaking! (A sign that says "Kirby 3:16" covers the enterance)
Yoshi: I will admit that ever since 2002 began, I have been one angry dude. Mario, I am still angry at you after I've beaten you up in a grocery store, humiliated you, and took this Intercontinental title from you! We're still rivals, Mario, but I am done with you. I'm not focusing on you no more. That was Spring. Summer is just around the corner. Whether I retain or lose my title, I am still gonna be one angry guy! And there is no one in the back that can do a damn thing about it! (SUDDENLY, THE LIGHTS GO OUT!)
Jeff: Oh, now what?!
(A CLASSICAL-LIKE THEME IS PLAYING! THE LIGHTS TURN BLUE! THE TITANTRON SAYS "JIGGLYPUFF"! THE CROWD GOES NUTS!)
Ryan: HEY!!!
Jeff: FIRST LUIGI, NOW, IT'S JIGGLYPUFF!!!
(Jigglypuff is entering through the dark blue lights! She gets to the ring apron, poses, and reveals that she has switched to blue eyes!)
Ryan: I don't know what to say. This is shocking seeing Superstars return to SSB! Jigglypuff was last seen as the "Red-Eyed Demon"! But why does she got the blue eyes back?!
Jeff: Jigglypuff used to have blue eyes!
Ryan: Yoshi seems shocked! Jigglypuff is Yoshi's girlfriend! Yoshi thought she was gone! What is Yoshi thinking right now?!
Yoshi: Alright...Okay...Yeah, maybe there is someone who can do a damn thing about the way I am. Yeah! Only one individual can! And that individual is no other than...my love...Jigglypuff! (crowd is cheering!)
Jeff: Uh oh. Looks like Jigglypuff's got the mic. She's gonna sing.
Jigglypuff: ......(about to speak but is very excited, she does not know how to start. The crowd is chanting & cheering for her!) Yoshi! (crowd continues chant) ....Yoshi, I....am very , very excited to be back where I live: Super Smash Bros! (crowd is cheering!) Now you ...saw me in January. I was scared. I was scared that I'd never see you again. Mario made one mistake: Fireing Jigglypuff! (crowd boos about that) Something sparked inside me. I cried about having to leave SSB. I felt I could not survive being the "Red-Eyed Demon" forever! But as you saw Luigi come back, everyone knew I would come back too! He could announce this, so I will! You see there was this law. It was made last month. You see when Mario fired ME and Luigi, people complained. Exactly how good would SSB Melee be without us? People wanted us back! And the law was successful! And now since we are back, SSB Melee has changed forever! Now all these fans have seen me last as the Red-Eyed Demon! I could not remain like that. I had to get rid of that! Many wanted to see the "old" Jigglypuff back! Well she's right in the ring now! (crowd is cheering!)
Jeff: Man. Jigglypuff was a crybaby in the past.
Jigglypuff: Yoshi, I've seen everything you've done while I've been gone! I've seen you take on Mario, win that Intercontinental title over him, and behind the scenes, I've seen you do things just for me! It has all touched my heart!
Jeff: Jigglypuff is insane. Girls just never stop talking.
Jigglypuff: When I was kicked out of SSB, all I had was my singing ability. I tried to become the next Britney Spears, but it was too hard for me to do. It just didn't work. So all I did was be on only 1 new Pokemon episode on TV out of like...25 between the day I was gone and now. I thought I'd never see you again, but now since that law passed, and now since I am back, I am going to be with you FOREVER, YOSHI!!! (Yoshi & Jigglypuff hug in the middle of the ring)
Ryan: That's the 2nd love situation we have had today.
Yoshi: ...Do you people see what I mean? Whenever I am down, angry, or even pissed off, Jigglypuff always makes me feel better! (crowd is cheering!) .....Mario, you listen to me real good! If I ever see you lay a hand or word on my baby, there's gonna be hell to pay! (crowd is cheering!)
Ryan: Very strong protection is gonna be needed. Mario can get through just about anything.
Yoshi: And you Kirby...I am defending my IC title against you. Whether I win or not, I'll tell you this: You are just nothin' but pink trash!
(The "Kirby 3:16" sign shatters and Kirby enters with a new version of his enterance music playing! The lights are dark purple and Kirby is walking to the ring, pissed!)
Ryan: Uh oh! Here comes the Rattlesnake!
Jeff: And his opponent from Dreamland, weighing at 45 pounds, Kirby!
(Kirby enters staring at Yoshi)
Kirby: What?! What?! What?! (crowd yells out "what?!")
Jeff: Oh please! He's stealing Austin's quote!
Kirby: You say Kirby's pink trash?! What?! (crowd yells out "what") Am I trash? (what) Am I garbage? (what) Am I junk? (what) Hell no! (what) Since I ain't, (what) I'm gonna open a can of whoop-ass, (what) on you, Yoshi! (what) And I will become the new IC Champion! (what) Why? (what) Because that's the bottom line! What?! (what) Cause Kirby said so! (what)
(The Bell Rings!)

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