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Support for Gay and Lesbian Parenting

In a Hawaiian same-sex marriage trial, Judge Kevin Change ruled that the State of Hawaii had not given any solid proof that it was legal to ban same-sex marriages. He wrote:

     'There certainly is a benefit to children which comes from being raised by their
      mother and father in an intact and relatively stress-free home. However, there is
      a diversity in the structure and configuration of families...In Hawaii, and elsewhere,
      children are being raised by their natural parents, single parents, step-parents,
      grandparents, adopted parents, hanai [adoptive] parents, foster parents, gay and
      lesbain parents, and same-sex couples...There are also families in Hawaii, and
      elsewhere, which do not have children...The evidence presented by [the] plantiffs
      and defendant establishes that the single most important factor in the
      development of a happy, healthy and well-adjusted child is the nuturing
      relationship between parent and child' (19).

Sexual identity of children raised by homosexual parents

There is some concern that those children raised by homosexual parents would have problems falling into their assigned gender role behaviors. Do these children have difficulty identifying with their own gender? As several studies have shown, these children do not show any marked difference in gender role behaviors.
                  *In a study of children ranging from ages 5 to 14, normal development of gender identity was seen
                    among these children of lesbian mothers (16).
                  *Research conducted by Golombok, Spencer, and Rutter (1983) found similar results--children
                    in their studies reported feeling happy with their gender, and did not wish to be a member of
                    the opposite sex (16).
                  *In interviews with 56 children of lesbian parents and 48 of heterosexual parents, no differences
                    were found in favorite TV show character, favorite games, or favorite toys. Children of
                    lesbians had less "sex-typed preferences" in their choices of school activities when compared
                    to the children of heterosexual parents (08).

Personal development: How the children of homosexuals develop

Concerns that children of homosexuals will be developmentally different from children of heterosexuals has led to several studies of different aspects of childhood development. Among the areas studied are:
                  *Behavior problems                                            *Personality
                  *Locus of control                                              *Intelligence
                  *Moral judgement                                              *Separation-individuation
                  *Self-concept                                                    *Psychiatric evaluations
Developmental problems in these specific areas were not found (16).

Are children with homosexual parents more likely to be homosexual?

It is often said that children of homosexuals (and those raised by homosexuals) are statistically more likely to be homosexual when compared to the general population trend. Several studies have shown that the children of homosexuals are in fact NOT more likely to be homosexual:
                 *In a study of 55 gay or bisexual men who had a total of 82 sons that were at least 17 years old,
                   90% of the sons were heterosexual (01).
                 *In studies by Bailey and Green, a "great majority" of the children of gay fathers and lesbian
                   mothers studied were found to be heterosexual (01, 07, 16).
                 *In a study conducted by Green, R. called Sexual identity of 37 children raised by homosexual or
                   transsesxual parents. (1978): 37 subjects that were 3-20 years old raised either by lesbian women
                   (21) or transsexuals (16) were evaluated on sexual orientation. All were heterosexual (07).
                 *In a suty conducted by Schulenburg, children of gays had about the same chance of being gay
                   as the children of heterosexuals (20).
                 *Martha Kirkpatrick, MD. of UCLA said, "evaluation...revealed no indication of differences in gender
                   development between children brought up by lesbian mothers and those raised by ummarried
                   heterosexual mothers" (20).

"When you look at kids with standard psychological assessments, you can't tell who has a lesbian parent and who has a heterosexual parent...That's really the main finding from these studies" (16).

(continued)

Attitudes: How children react when their parents come out

Do children react with total anger and rejection when told that their parent is gay? In a survey conducted by Schulenburg, an important age-related response was recorded (20):
                   Under 12 age group: Children were indifferent to parent's sexuality
                   Over 12 age group: Reactions varied and initial rejection increased
In the over 12 age group, increased concern for social health issues (such as AIDS) was felt for the gay parent, as well as worry about losing social standing or a job. 90% of those surveyed said that time and experience resolved their concerns, while 10% had just found out that their parent was gay or didn't have a close relationship with the gay parent. Parents reported the following information:
                    31% of children were positive and accepting
                    41% of children were indifferent
                    8% of children were unhappy or openly hostile
                    20% of parents were too afraid to come out to their children
Differences were also seen in how sons and daughters responded to hearing of their parent's sexual orientation. Daughters rarley expressed outright rejection of the parent, while sons tended towards initial rejection, followed by acceptance.