PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT
Growth Patterns
This stage is marked by some rather startling and noticeable changes. The adult teeth are making an appearance, which alters the facial features. The thymus, an endocrine gland that provided natural immunity before the lymph system had built up antibodies, begins to atrophy. The child's body is now "on its own" to remain pure. This correlates with the diminishing of the "angelic" appearance of the younger years. Also, the eyes finish developing, and eyesight is now as good as a normal adult. (This is a point to note: in today's world, we have children learn to read from two to five years before their eyesight is developed to full capacity. This could well be a vital factor in reading difficulties and in the large number of children needing corrective lenses.) This is definitely a "talk" stage, as noted earlier. Speech expands rapidly, and the ability to express complex ideas grows immensely.
Nutrition
The nutritional principles discussed in the section on early childhood still apply. Now, however, there are added factors for parents and educators to note. With the child out of the house and direct parental supervision more and more, some formal nutrition education needs to be given. School lunches, after-school snacks, and other eating activities need guidance and forethought. With pressure from peers and TV, children can become exposed and susceptible to a wide range of unhealthy choices. Prevention works best, through education and the development of pride in healthy living. Adults can hold a relatively strict line, and limiting what comes home from the supermarket to sit in cupboards is one way to do it. Remember, the thymus is slowing its activity, and the child no longer has natural immunity. Building a strong immune system requires proper nutrition.
PSYCHO-SOCIAL & CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT
Developmental Urges & Tasks
With natural, innocent purity coming to an end, the child is urged toward self-purification. In physical terms, this means building a strong immune system, In psychological terms, it means leaving behind the purely subconscious world of imitation and entering the more conscious realm of self-authority. Purity of heart does not comes easily or automatically any longer; it must be maintained by the expression of assurance, courage, and willingness to try new things. Also related to this is the sudden increase in the desire to relate to others socially and feel a sense of belonging. You can see evidence of this in the number of youngsters who join clubs and teams and have "best friends" at this age.
Erikson described this stage as a time to develop industry. This would mean proving one's value, ability, and loyalty. Again, this relates to maintaining purity, for the reverse of industry is inferiority or low self-esteem. This is the root of many "impure" behaviors at this age, including disrespect, laziness, bullying, and vandalism.
Sense Development
Older children are compelled to develop their feeling or exploring realm, and senses now begin to take on both literal and metaphorical meaning:
- taste begins to be transformed from gathering flavors to cultivating interests and a sense of fineness, as in specialized hobbies;
- warmth is transformed from a "getting" sensation to a giving one, as in caring for a pet or looking out for a friend; and
- vision begins to transform from passive reception to active, radiant imaging, as in envisioning plans or how another person lives and feels.
Listening is not easily developed during this stage, as many parents and teachers will testify, and it actually does not refine a great deal during this stage. However, as the child develops other senses, and learns the value of stillness and inner peace, listening becomes as refined as it can get for now. With the development of these more accurate tools of sensing, the older child is ready for external learning, which is appropriate at this time.
Character Development
When the child reaches this stage, there is a need to begin more active and concentrated character training. Up to now the child has imitated the actions and attitudes of the adults around, so the behavior was not so much an expression of character as it was a reflection of the character of others. With the advent of this new stage, the child begins to demonstrate a more individuated personality which is less reliant on external influences. Simple compliance is no longer the goal of discipline. Now the goal is to bring out a natural sense of authority or "can-do" that blends with the rhythms and needs of the family.
Utilizing the child's emerging capacity for memory and observation, character development can include numerous practical activities. Choices can be allowed, and the consequences can be reviewed. Chores can be an expected part of daily routine (actually a stepping-up of those repetitive actions developed in early childhood). Plans can be made for a personal activity, or contributed to a family activity. Team sports or clubs can become part of the child's life. All these things help build a sense of authority and the ability to make accurate discernments.
Even with the best of situations, the middle-age child will still experience a period of crisis, most notably around the age of nine. So much is changing, neurologically, hormonally, socially, and mentally, that there will inevitably be moments when the child's internal world feels overwhelming. This may take the form of regression, isolation, rebellion, or any number of other reactions. Proper parental encompassment of this storm may need to take any number of forms: soothing to meet a child's confusion, sternness to meet rebellion, or perhaps non-interference to give the child room to do some inner processing.
Educational Approach
Middle Childhood and Adolescence include a span of years in which learning is primarily external. It need not always be physical, although there is a need for a balance of motor/tactile development with mental/logical development. Primarily, the emphasis of focus for the child is the external world: "How does it work? Why does it behave that way? What can I do with it?" This is the time for exploration of the environment, through action, numbers, words, movement, and art.
As the older child explores the outer world, there is a need to be able to articulate what is learned. Practical skills are needed, but they need to be introduced and practiced with a recognition of design and purpose. Reading, penmanship, and spelling are practical tools, and as such there is a question as to why they must be imposed. Children will develop the need for these tools, and perhaps that is the time to teach them. Remember, eyesight is not developed until around age eight. Shouldn't reading and writing skills follow such a natural timeline and begin after that? In the meantime, and while learning these skills, why not train children in other language skills such as speech and storytelling. This can help develop memory and a sense of authority.
Children in this stage will benefit from exploring design in the world, through natural patterns (in nature, numbers, maps, and geometry), and through practical sciences (gardening, animal husbandry, anatomy). Even the art, music, and movement of the earlier years can be refined and incorporated into the study of design. (They also can be used in learning to read and write, as many proponents of "right brain" learning will testify.)
Above all, children love to do all these things in the context of human interaction. This is an essential element in the development of character and intellect.
SOCIALIZATION & GUIDANCE PROCESSES
Parenting Patterns
During these years, parents can participate with the child in the maintenance of a pure heart and high self-esteem. This gives parents several tasks. First, since the child is moving out of the "naturally adorable" stage, parents need to purge themselves of the notion that the child will or should always be "angelic" in appearance or behavior. Second, they need to be aware of the child's needs to express courage and authority, which means allowing more trust and responsibility . Third, they can begin to share the role of guardian angel with the child, helping him or her make wise choices and reviewing consequences of choices. This involves what Galinsky calls the interpretive role of parents: watching TV programs together, discussing the news, checking out which current movies are acceptable; in other words, helping the child gain a clear-hearted perspective or interpretation of the world. This will influence whether the child will approach the world with an overall positive or negative attitude.
Fourth, and perhaps most important, parents can acknowledge the growing abilities of the child. This gives assurance that all is well, and the child can feel loved even during times of social turmoil and self-awakening. In this way, parents can instill a sense of authority in the child, an authority that is cooperative, so there is no need for coersion or bribery. This is the next natural stage of discipline after teaching by example: inspiring a sense of willingness and ability.
Responsibility
By the age of eight, the child has begun to exhibit a character that is not so dependent on parental and home atmosphere. Now other adults can have a powerful influence, and that immediately brings them into a sharing of responsibility. Teachers are the most obvious adults in this regard. Also, members of the extended family may take on greater roles if they are willing and able and geographically close. Even club sponsors and team coaches can have a strong influence at this time. However, the bulk of the responsibility is shared between the home and the school, and communication between the two is essential. Often this only happens when the child is performing or behaving inappropriately, with occasional mention of fine achievement. The proper form of communication at this stage is more consistent, relaxed, and anecdotal. In other words, parents and teachers can establish a bond of partnership and friendship that holds the child safe and communicates about all areas of development on a regular basis.
Society and Community Involvement
The school is the primary social agency for the child. Out of this setting come friendships, clubs, sports, etc. Parents sometimes recognize this and in turn give their support to the school as a neighborhood social center. Through PTA, volunteer programs, sports, and other activities, parents can make the school a vital part of the family's support system.
Grandparents can also play an important role at this time. Whether they are nearby or at a great distance, they can provide critical services to both parent and child (beyond occasional babysitting). Being removed from the direct responsibility to raise the child, they tend to give more non-judgmental attention. Although this may lead to spoiling, it often just gives everyone a break from the routine and helps the child see life from a different perspective. In this way grandparents act as godparents -- adults who sense a strong bond with the child and offer a guidance that is almost subliminal. Of course, others may take on this role, but when grandparents do so, there is a natural ease within the entire family structure.