PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT
Growth Patterns
Puberty marks the beginning of this stage. Although we tend to think of this stage in terms of sex hormones and their work on the body and its urges, it is actually a "think" cycle. Thought becomes as crucial a signpost of adolescence as physical changes: teenagers are constantly thinking, about what they feel, what others feel, what they want to do or not do, etc. Also, by this time the thymus has completely atrophied to the size it will remain for the rest of life, which means that the immune system is "on its own." The adult teeth are all in place, with some back molars coming a little later in the cycle. This gives a decidedly more adult appearance.
Nutrition
Teenagers are notorious for eating poorly, regardless of whether they eat a lot or almost nothing. Parents can combat this in the early years as a preventive measure, although adolescents may choose to ignore sound practices (for a while, at least). However, since the same foods that contribute to health also contribute to clear skin and healthy hair, it is possible to appeal to a teenager's vanity as a way to keep up good nutrition.
PSYCHO-SOCIAL & CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT
Developmental Urges & Tasks
Although the typical view of teenagers would not seem to verify it, young people at this stage actually harbor a great sense of giving, service, or blessing. Entering a period of great self-realization, they begin to feel stirrings of power and destiny -- making a difference in the world. These feelings are translated into various desires, such as making money, creating art, or helping others. Typically they help their peers, but they also pour this desire to give into team sports, service clubs, and volunteer programs.
Adolescents are also dealing with their new-found sense of intellect and self-consciousness. The compulsion to think can be effectively channelled in service: it gives them something constructive to think about. It also gives them a new arena to find their sense of identity, which Erikson describes as the task of adolescence. True, teenagers need space apart to rediscover their relatedness to things, outside of family influence. But too much space and reflection can lead to introversion and self-absorption. This tends to magnify what is distorted and confused, and the resulting lack of perspective can lead to morbid thoughts and behavior -- even suicide. So getting "out of themselves" in active service and creativity benefits young people as much as those they serve.
Sense Development
Teenagers are compelled to develop their sense of clear, precise thought. For this, certain abilities need to develop:
- the sense of appropriate speech, which relates to building vocabulary and a discernment for fine shadings of meaning, as well as a recognition of a proper tone of respect;
- active listening and hearing, which relates to the ability to follow instructions and also the development of empathy, "hearing" both the words and the undertones or body language behind them;
- the sense of thought generation and flow, which relates to keeping a train of thought and avoiding tangents and other errors of thinking; and
- the sense of ego, which relates to the discovery of the individuality and uniqueness of oneself and others.
These skills provide the foundation for true thinking: discernment of purpose, opportunity, and relationship -- knowing when one is in the right place at the right time with the right people, and for the right reason. Armed with these senses, the adolescent can make fine distinctions when processing both external and internal information. This establishes the proper learning mode for the rest of the life cycle.
Character Development
Before this stage, emotions were quite primitive: the child was happy, sad, angry, silly, etc. Now the emotions develop with vast shadings and subtleties. As the emotions take on this new coloring, there is a need to harness mental energy so that the emotions do not become the dominant factor. Teenagers instinctively know this and pour their passion into activities that are mentally stimulating (at least to them). Sports, academics, cars, beauty and fashion, jobs, gossip, and any one of innumerable other topics may occupy their thoughts and energies. Still, the emotions, as yet unbridled, can creep in at times and turn exuberance into chaos.
In early adolescence, there is a great desire to break away from family identification and move toward peer identification and self-absorption. These tendencies are healthy, although they can take on rebellious or morbid aspects if parents have not tended to certain matters: nutrition, home atmosphere, respect, and the encouragement of self-authority and pride during childhood.
One critical way in which the young-to-middle teenager will move out of family identification is to feel and express conflict with the opposite-sex parent. Why? Because this is the parent whom the child has wanted to please the most. So the teenager suddenly needs to break this inner sense of obligation to that parent, who represents the bonding-point to the rest of the family. It is not uncommon for a young teenager to project these feelings onto the parent and come out with statements like, "You don't even like me, do you?" What should a sensitive parent do? First, try not to fight back or make the young person feel guilty. Second, encourage a closer connection with the same-sex parent. Third, be alert for ways to keep a connection with the child that do not fall into old habits of relating. Fourth, accept the inevitable.
In later adolescence, the young person has a shift and begins to feel and express conflict with the same-sex parent. This again is natural, but for a different reason than before. This parent represents the role model for adult behavior, and now the child needs to break the inner sense of having to live up to someone else's standards. This is part of the natural progression into adulthood: the desire to discover "my" unique way to meet the world. The sensitive parent will understand this and let the young person make mistakes and "go the long way around" situations without ridicule or judgment. So the parent may have to stand back and watch money being overspent, or employment opportunities get wasted. However, there cannot be any sense of abandoning the child, who is only exploring, perhaps clumsily, the fringes of adulthood. Just the fact that this young person has such a strong sense of self-responsibility at this point is indication that something right is happening in the overall process.
It must be noted here that one of the major reasons for adolescent trauma is the lack of clear-headed, non-judging, actually grown-up adults in their world. In all candor, most people in adult bodies are still carrying around childish and adolescent emotional patterns. They still want to have their own way, and they still throw tantrums (perhaps more sophisticated) when they do not get their way. Children tend to accept this without necessarily noticing at a conscious level. But adolescents know it all too well. They are quite often self-taught experts on human motives and behavior, and they can spot a "phony" in an instant. Parents who have never really grown up and learned to handle their emotions and live graciously with the Creative Process will alienate their teenagers. But watch teenagers gravitate and stick to adults they perceive as having integrity and comfort in their own skin. It should be no surprise: young people need to know that it is fun to grow up and take responsibility, that enjoyment of the adult world is natural. That is exactly what they are looking and listening for in adults, because they need reassurance that it is "worth it" to grow up.
Educational Approach
More practical skills are needed at this stage, and they can match quite well with the individual's growing intellectual interests. Math can be as abstract as algebra and trigonometry and as practical as bookkeeping. English can incorporate speech, literature, and composition. Health and nutrition, as mentioned earlier, can be very practical in appealing to teenagers' desire for good looks and stamina. History and geography can be relevant when they focus on human behavior and trends across time and space. Art and industrial arts are also fine tools for learning at this stage.
Vocational training at the high school level has begun to move beyond the "shop class" of previous generations. Now even college-bound students can take advantage of hands-on training in everything from food service to auto mechanics to business office simulation. Home economics classes have also begun to re-format, providing training far beyond simple cooking and sewing to include family budgeting, marriage preparation, and child care training. This kind of instruction is both practical and character building, since it provides skills that are marketable and an opportunity to discover the value of work and forethought.
SOCIALIZATION & GUIDANCE PROCESSES
Parenting Patterns
When the child comes into adolescence, parents can offer the spirit or essence of Life. Previously, the child viewed adult life as remote and even mysterious. Now there is a keen interest, even scrutiny, in "grown-up" function. Parents would do well to exhibit the fullness of their adulthood at this time, revealing (as appropriate) the intricacies and radiance of life at its fullest.
This is also a time to be radiant in the sense of offering enlightened reason and guidance, which is the next step on the road to self-discipline. Here, the parent begins to work with the burgeoning mental ability in the child, letting it develop along lines of interest while guiding the processes of rationality and logic. This also means keeping tabs on emotional states which could upset the delicate balance of this new-found intelligence. In a world that seems to encourage criticism and blame, parents can take a firm stance in maintaining a tone of respect in the home. Regardless of the feelings of conflict and anguish, adults who are emotionally mature can establish a "bottom line" with the teenager that enforces mutual respect and rational handling of crises. This can be seen in the "Tough Love" movement, which has healed many families with adult-teen conflict.
Responsibility
As the child moves further into this stage, the parents should be able to slowly back out of their role of responsibility. This may not always be possible as the world is now. Teenagers need to break ties with the nuclear family. However, there is often no one to turn to for guidance except parents, and with that choice, many teens choose to bring their thoughts and hearts to their peers. This is ultimately disastrous, for peer counseling can never bring a teenager to a sense of purpose, since purpose is tied in to seeing the "next step" beyond the stage one is presently in.
Some teenagers can bring their world to their parents, who leave their former parental roles to become counselors and guides. Other teens do find someone, often in their twenties or well into later adulthood, to fill this role. This may be a friend, relative, or teacher. Whoever it is, this is the person who has responsibility for the child, and it would be wise for parents to acknowledge and accept this person for their child's sake. True, the parents will continue to be financially and legally responsible, but responsibility for the heart, for the delicate process of guiding mental and emotional energies, now rests with this person and the adolescent. Together, they will begin to unlock the potential that longs to be revealed.
Society and Community Involvement
During this stage, many people and institutions vie for the young person's attention, and the support network can become very broad or very narrow. Peers offer a certain kind of support, which is natural but somewhat limited, since it lacks the larger perspective which an adult can provide. Teachers and other adults associated with the school can be approachable, and extracurricular activities can offer a wealth of support, mentally and emotionally. Also, many communities run recreation and drop-in centers for young people looking for companionship or athletic challenge.