(Dumb Phrases and Questions)
*How did a fool and his money get together?
*Whats another word for Thesaurus?
*When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
*Don't play stupid with me, I'm better at it!
*We come in peace... shoot to kill.
**Suicide hotline... please hold.
*Hi ho, hi ho, it's hand grenades we throw.
**Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.
*Armed, dangerous, and off my medication.
*You've got mail!
*If it cant be fixed with vice-grips and duct tape it can't be fixed at all.
*...And that's also why God created grenade launchers.
*Hang on to Toto, Dorothy, because Kansas in going bye-bye.
*Why is there an expiration date on the sour cream container?
*Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
*Time slows if youre on the outside of the bathroom door.
*Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional.
*If you dont like the news, then go out and make some.
*How can I miss you if you never go away?
**If guns are illegal, can we use swords?
*Guns dont kill people, postal workers do.
*Good friends are so hard to find, the pieces fly so far.
*Hello good citizen! My name is Batman! Whee!
*Very funny Scotty... Now beam down my clothes.
*WE ARE MICROSOFT. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED.
*Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
*When in danger, or in doubt... Run in circles scream and shout!
*If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk.
*Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
*Despite the cost of living have you notice it remains popular?
*Madness takes it's toll... Exact change please!
**Energizer Bunny Arrested: Charged With Battery
*Suicide is a way of telling God 'You cant fire me! I quit!'
*Fight Crime. Shoot Back.
**Do Not Wash - This vehicle is under going a scientific dirt test.
*You! Out of the gene pool!
*If youre rich, I'm single.
*Why am I writing this?
*Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
*Boredom and caffeine make a bad combination.
*Stress: The confusion created when the mind overrides the body's urge to choke the living crap out of some jerk who desperately needs it.
*If you cant beat em, shoot em.
*I bet you I can stop gambling.
**Never, ever give a gun to a duck.
*Make it idiot proof and someone will come along and create a better idiot.
**Friends help you move. Real friends help you move the sleeping bodies into the pool at 3:00 am.
**A friend is someone who is there to bail you out of trouble. A real friend is someone who is there right beside you saying, "Man that was awesome!"
I*s it true that cannibals don't eat clowns, because they taste funny.
*We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart?
*It's all fun and games 'til someone loses an eye. Then it's a sport!
*Bullets speak louder than words or reason.
*Do not disturb. I'm already quite disturbed.
*Of course I'm sane! The voices said so!
**There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
*Why do we say something is out of whack when we dont really know what a whack is? And where can get more of it?
*Guilty! This court sentences you to three weeks of Barney!
*Dont annoy the crazy person.
*If you shot a mime, should you use a silencer?
*Not now! I'm too busy having a conversation with my rice crispies.
*I'm not antisocial, it's just that I dont like you.
*Trespassers will be drawn and quartered.
*4 out of the 5 people think the fifth person is an idiot.
*Your village called, it's missing its idiot.
**True heroes never die, they just fade away. That is, unless they have done enough damage to be recognized forever.
*Men are proof that evolution can go backwards.
*When I was born, I was so surprised that I couldnt talk for a year and a half.
*Time is the best teacher, unfortunately it kills it's students.
*If your parents didn't have kids, then neither will you.