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by Star Lin
R/S
http://swiftgold.simplenet.com/ronins/dare1.htm, /dare2.htm, /dare3.htm, /dare4.htm, /dare5.htm
SYNOPSIS:
| After feeling guilty about an accident, Seiji finds that he can�t deny any of Touma�s wishes. . .but is he letting their relationship go too far? |
MISH:
| I can�t decide whether or not the title applies to the whole story, metaphorically speaking, or if it only literally applies to the first part. It�s named after the dare that leads Touma to reveal his feelings for Seiji to the warrior of light, but that all happens in the first two pages. There�re four more parts to the story after that. |
MAKO:
| I don't know about the title fitting the piece, either; though it could be something along the lines of "Daring to Face Your Emotions." |
MISH:
|
It could apply to the entire story, and this is a stretch, if the story is interpreted as a dare for Seiji to get over the notion that "he was supposed to like girls."
excerpt: Or maybe open your eyes, his mind whispered to him. It played out scenes from his life to get the point across. His sister using him like a doll, then finding out that his grandfather had dressed him up like a girl, and last but not least when they had dared each other to flirt with some girls. That one stayed in his mind as he remembered that he only got a few words out and the girl was asking him to marry her. Girls are nothing but trouble, that part of his mind whispered again. |
MAKO:
| Now that I think about it, the title may refer to how Touma slowly challenges and tests Seiji's limits. Touma goes out of his way to slowly melt Seiji's icy exterior, and he does it in the subtlest of ways. |
MISH:
|
But that�s about as far as "the dare" goes in respect to Seiji�s feelings toward homosexual relationships. However, Seiji�s feelings are described with a bit more detail, sans any metaphorical reference to a dare.
excerpt: He just couldn't keep pretending that he felt right about this. He didn't feel right and he knew that Touma would get to the point that he wanted more then just this. What was he supposed to do then when he couldn't go as far as Touma would want? Seiji had spent the last week like this with nothing to show for it but dark rings under his eyes. |
MISH:
|
My impression is that Star Lin titled it before or after having written the first part, and then ignored the title for the following four parts.
There�s nothing wrong with that, of course, I was just a little disappointed that the event that became the story�s namesake wasn�t highlighted a bit more. Nevertheless, I never tire of "first time" stories. It�s always interesting to see how each author brings two Troopers together in an homosexual relationship. However, I didn�t understand the part with the yoroi at the end of the story. That scene just left me wondering and, in my opinion, could have been left out. |
MAKO:
| This fic is loaded with angst, and I mean LOADED! It does succeed in making the reader anxious to see what happens in the end, and for that I liked it quite a bit. I usually go for fics that are on the lighter side of things� or pure mush, when I'm in the mood. "The Dare" did get my attention, though, title boo-boos notwithstanding. I did enjoy the fic overall. |
MISH:
| Do watch for dropped tenses while reading it, though; there are quite a few verbs that weren�t conjugated. This consistent mistake really interrupted me while I was reading it, much like bumps in a road (a pet peeve for skateboarders, although that�s a different rant). Watch out for the html as well. At times it�s centred, and it shifts fonts toward the end. |
MAKO:
| I won't go on about the html because I've had problems with it in the past myself. And while I'm not as fickle about grammar as Mish, I do have trouble reading fics that have gross inconsistencies. |
MISH:
| Also, there are quite a few references to the first OAV for a writer who only thinks the story takes place "somewhere after Gaiden." Familiarity with the OAV wouldn�t hurt. |
MAKO:
| Yeah, knowing about the series you're writing about does help. Though I can't complain about my first foray into Gundam fics, after only watching a few episodes. |
MISH:
| That was such a shameless plug, Mako dear. =) |
MISH:
| Overall, the story is fairly decent. I didn�t point out many of the good things because they far outnumber the not so good, but this is a story I�d recommend reading in one�s free time. 7/10. |
MAKO:
|
7.5 out of 10. Like I said, I'm not as picky about grammar as Mish, but I don't care for errors that make me re-read a bit, to understand what is being said. Overall, it is a good fic.
Fic reviewed on May 30, 2000 |