SPIKE & DRUSILLA QUOTES

The following is a complete list of everything that Spike and Drusilla say on 'Buffy, the Vampire Slayer' and 'Angel the Series'. Just now, I have from 'School Hard' to 'Becoming II'.


SERIES II

School Hard

Spike - "Home, sweet home."

Spike - "You were there? Oh, please! If every vampire who said he was at the crucifixion was actually there, it would have been like Woodstock."

Spike - "I was actually at Woodstock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a flowerperson, and I spent the next six hours watchin' my hand move."

Spike - "So. Who do you kill for fun around here?"

Annointed one - "Who are you?"
Spike - "Spike. You're that Annointed guy. I read about you. You've got Slayer problems. That's a bad piece of luck. Do you know what I find works real good with Slayers? Killing them."

Annointed one - "Can you?"
Spike - "A lot faster than Nancy-boy there. Yeah, I did a couple Slayers in my time. I don't like to brag. Who am I kidding? I love to brag! There was this one Slayer during the Boxer Rebellion, and..."

Spike - "Drusilla. You shouldn't be walking around. You're weak."
Drusilla - "Look at all the people. Are these nice people?"
Spike - "We're getting along."
Drusilla - "This one has power. I could feel it from the outside."
Spike - "Yeah. He's the big noise in these parts. Anointed, and all that."
Drusilla - "Do you like daisies? Hmm? I plant them, but they always die. Everything I put in the ground withers and dies... Spike? I'm cold."
Spike - "I've got you."
Drusilla - "I'm a princess."
Spike - "That's what you are."
scene where Dru cuts his cheek and licks away the drop of blood
Spike - "Me and Dru, we're movin' in."

Spike - "Now. Any of you want to test who's got the biggest wrinklies 'round here... step on up. I'll do your Slayer for you. But you keep your flunkies from tryin' anything behind my back. Deal?"

Drusilla - "I can't see her. The Slayer. I can't see. It's dark where she is. Kill her. Kill her, Spike. Kill her for me?"
Spike - "It's done, baby."
Drusilla - "Kill her for princess?"
Spike - "I'll chop her into messes."
Drusilla - "You are my sweet... my little Spike."

Spike - "So. How 'bout this Slayer? Is she tough?"

Spike - "Go get something to eat."

Spike - "Where's the phone? I need to call the police. There's some big guy out there trying to bite somebody."

Spike - "Nice work, love."
Buffy - "Who are you?"
Spike - "You'll find out on Saturday."
Buffy - "What happens on Saturday?"
Spike - "I kill you."

Sheila - "Who are you?"
Spike - "Who do you want me to be?"
Sheila - "Did you see..."
Spike - "...those two losers who thought they were good enough for you?"
Sheila - "What happened to 'em?"
Spike - "They got sleepy."
Sheila - "Huh?"
Spike - "And you got something a whole lot better."

Drusilla - "Miss Edith speaks out of turn. She's a bad example, and will have no cakes today. Shhhh."
Spike - "Darling, are you going to eat something?"
Drusilla - "I'm not hungry. I miss Prague."
Spike - "You nearly died in Prague. Idiot mob. This is the place for us. The Hellmouth will restore you, put color in your cheeks, metaphorically speaking, and in a few week's time..."
Drusilla - "The stars will align, and smile down on us."
Spike - "And then, God, this town will burn."
Drusilla - "A pretty fire!"
Drusilla - "They're preparing."
Spike - "St. Vigeous is coming up. Should be a party."
Drusilla - "You should go up with them and cleanse."
Spike - "Dru..."
Drusilla - "The boy doesn't trust you. They follow him. I think sometimes that all my hair will fall out and I'll be bald."
Spike - "Never happen. Alright. I'll go up and get chanty with the fellas, but you got to do me one favor. Eat something."
he gives her Sheila and walks out
Drusilla - "You see, Miss Edith? If you'd been good you could watch with the rest."

Spike - "What can I say? I couldn't wait."

Spike - "Nobody gets out! Especially the girl!"

Vampire - "We cut the power. Nobody got out."
Spike - "And the Slayer?"
Vampire - "She either went that way or that way. I saw two others."
Spike - "You don't know?!"

Spike - "I'm a veal kind of guy. You're too old to eat. But not to kill. (breaks the man's neck) I feel better."

Spike - "Slayy-er! Here, kitty, kitty. I find one of your friends first, I'm gonna suck 'em dry. And use their bones to bash your head in. Are you getting a word picture here?"

Spike (sing-song) - "Someone's in the ceiling..."

Vampire - "Door's solid."
Spike - "Use your head."
smashes vampire's head into emergency axe thing on wall
Spike - "You! Come with me!"

Spike - "Angelus!"
Angel - "Spike!"
Spike - "I'll be damned!"
They hug
Angel - "I taught you to always guard your perimeter. Tsk, tsk, tsk. You should have someone out there."
Spike - "I did. I'm surrounded by idiots. What's new with you?"
Angel - "Everything."
Spike - "Yeah. Come up against this Slayer yet?"
Angel - "She's cute. Not too bright, though. Gave the puppy dog 'I'm all tortured' act. Keeps her off my back when I feed!"
Spike - "People still fall for that Anne Rice routine? What a world!"

Spike - "I haven't seen you in the killing fields for an age."
Angel - "I'm not much for company."
Spike - "No, you never were. So, why're you so scared of this Slayer?"
Angel - "Scared?"
Spike - "Yeah. Time was you would've taken her out in a heartbeat. Now look at you. But this, uh, tortured thing is an act, right? You're not... housebroken?"
Angel - "I saw her kill the Master. Hey, you think you can take her alone? Be my guest. I'll just feed and run."
Spike - "Don't be silly! We're old friends. We'll do it together. Let's drink to it."
slowly leaning in to bite Xander
Spike - "You think you can fool me?! You were my sire, man! You were my... Yoda!"
Angel - "Things change."
Spike - "Not us! Not demons! Man, I can't believe this. You Uncle Tom! Come on, people! This isn't a spectator sport!"

Spike - "Fe, fi, fo fum. I smell the blood of a nice ripe... girl."
Buffy - "Do we really need weapons for this?
Spike - "I just like them. They make me feel all manly."
both drop weapons
Spike - "The last Slayer I killed... she begged for her life. You don't strike me as the begging kind."
Buffy - "You shouldn't have come here."
Spike - "No. I've messed up your doilies and stuff. But I just got so bored. I'll tell you what. As a personal favour from me to you I'll make it quick. It won't hurt a bit."
Buffy kicks him in the neck
Spike - "Now, that hurt!"
pulls out wooden beam from the wall
Spike - "But not as much as this will."
moves to thwack Buffy over the head with the beam, but Joyce hits him over the head with an axe
Joyce - "You get the hell away from my daughter!"
Spike - "Women!"

Drusilla - "Spike, did she hurt you?"
Spike - "It was close, baby, but..."
Drusilla - "Oh, come here."
she strokes his cheek
Spike - "A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure."
Drusilla - "You'll kill her, and then we'll have a nice celebration."
Spike - "Yeah, a party."
Drusilla - "Yeah. With streamers... and songs."
Spike - "How's the annoying one?"
Drusilla - "He doesn't wanna play."
Spike - "Figures. Well, suppose I better go make nice."

Annointed One - "You failed."
Spike - "I, uh... I offer penance."
Vampire - "Penance?! You should lay down your life! Our numbers are depleted, the feast of St. Vigeous has been ruined by your impatience!"
Spike - "I was rash, and if I had to do it all over again... Who am I kidding? I would do it exactly the same, only I'd do this..."
Annointed one - "No!"
Spike - "...first!"
shoves Annointed one into cage and starts pulling a chain which lifts it up
Spike - "From now on, we're gonna have a little less ritual, and a little more fun around here."
Pulls cage up into the sunlight. Annointed one turns to dust. Drusilla takes Spike's hand
Spike - "Let's see what's on TV."


Hallowe'en

Spike - "Here it comes. Rewind that. Let's see that again.... She's tricky. Baby likes to play."
watches tape of Buffy staking vampire with a sign
Spike - "You see that? The way she stakes him with that thing? That's what's called resourceful. Rewind it again."
Drusilla - "Miss Edith needs her tea."
Spike - "C'mere, poodle."
Drusilla - "Do you love my insides? The parts you can't see?"
Spike - "Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. That's why I've got to study this Slayer. Once I know her I can kill her. And once I kill her you can have your run of Sunnyhell. Get strong again."
Drusilla - "Don't worry. Everything's switching. Outside to inside. It makes her weak."
Spike - "Really? Did my pet have a vision?"
Drusilla - "Do you know what I miss? Leeches."
Spike - "Come on, talk to Daddy. This thing that makes the Slayer weak? When is it?"
Drusilla - "Tomorrow."
Spike - "Tomorrow's Halloween. Nothing happens on Halloween."
Drusilla - "Someone's come to change it all. Someone new."

Spike - "Well! This is just... neat!"

Spike - "Do you hear that, my friends? Somewhere out here is the tenderest meat you've ever tasted, and all we have to do is find her first!"

Spike - "Look at you. Shaking. Terrified. Alone. Lost little lamb... I love it."


Lie to Me

Drusilla - "Are you lost?"
Boy - "No. My mom's just supposed to pick me up is all."
Drusilla - "Do you want me to walk you home?"
Boy - "No, thank you."
Drusilla - "My mummy used to sing me to sleep at night. Run and catch, run and catch, the lamb is caught in the blackberry patch... She had the sweetest voice. What will your mummy sing when they find your body?"
Boy - "I'm not supposed to talk to people."
Drusilla - "Oh. Well, I'm not a person, see, so that's just..."
Angel - "Run home."

Drusilla - "My Angel!"
Angel - "Hello, Drusilla."
Drusilla - "Do you remember the song mummy used to sing me? Pretty."
Angel - "I remember."
Drusilla - "Yes, you do."
Angel - "Drusilla, leave here. I'm offering you that chance. Take Spike and get out."
Drusilla - "Or you'll hurt me? No. No, you can't. Not anymore."
Angel - "If you don't leave it'll go badly. For all of us."
Drusilla - "My dear boy's gone all away, hasn't he? To her."
Angel - "Who?"
Drusilla - "The girl. The Slayer. Your heart stinks of her. Poor little thing. She has no idea what's in store."
Angel - "This can't go on, Drusilla. It's gotta end."
Drusilla - "Oh, no, my pet. This is just the beginning."

Drusilla - "You sing the sweetest little song. Won't you sing for me, hmm? Don't you love me anymore?"
Spike - "Darling! I heard a funny thing just now. Lucius tells me that you went out on a hunt the other night."
Drusilla - "My tummy was growly. And you were out. (to the bird) Come on. I'll pout if you don't sing."
Spike - "You, um, meet anyone? Anyone interesting? Like Angel?"
Drusilla - "Angel."
Spike - "Yeah. So what might you guys have talked about, then? Old times? Childhood pranks? It's a little off, you two so friendly, him being the enemy and all that."
Drusilla - "I'll give you a seed if you sing."
Spike - "The bird's dead, Dru. You left it in a cage, and you didn't feed it, and now it's all dead, just like the last one.... Oh, I'm sorry baby. I'm a bad, rude man. I just don't like you goin' out, that's all. You are weak. Would you like a new bird? One that's not dead?"

Spike - "Do I have anyone on watch here? It's called security, people. Are you all asleep? Or did we finally find a restaurant that delivers?"
Ford - "I know who you are."
Spike - "Yeah, I know who I am, too. So what?"
Ford - "I came looking for you, Spike. You are Spike, right? William the Bloody?"
Spike - "You've got a real death wish. It's almost interesting."
Spike - "Oh, this is great. This'll be very useful. So, how did you find me?"
Ford - "That doesn't matter. I've got something to offer you. I-I'm pretty sure this is the part where you take out a watch and say I've got thirty seconds to convince you not to kill me? It's traditional."
Spike - "Well, I don't go much for tradition."
Drusilla - "Wait, love."
Spike - "Well?"
Ford - "Oh, c'mon! Say it! It's no fun if you don't say it.
Spike - "What? Oh. You've got thirty seconds to convince me not to kill you."
Ford - "Yes! See, this is the best! I wanna be like you. A vampire."
Spike - "I've known you for two minutes, and I can't stand you. I don't really feature you livin' forever. Can I eat him now, love?"

Spike - "When we get there, everybody spread out. Two men on the door, first priority's the Slayer, everything else is fair game, and let's remember to share, people. Are you sure you're up for this?"
Drusilla - "I want a treat. I need a treat."
Spike - "And a special one you'll have. Lucius! Bring the car around."

Spike - "Take them all. Save the Slayer for me."

Buffy - "Spike!"
she has a stake pointed at Drusilla's chest
Spike - "Everybody STOP!"
Buffy - "Good idea. Now you let everyone out, or your girlfriend fits in an ashtray."
Drusilla - "Spike?"
Spike - "It's gonna be alright, baby. Let them go!"
Buffy - "Down the stairs."
Spike - "Uh, where's the doorknob?"


What's My Line 1

Spike - "Read it again."
Dalton - "Well, I'm not sure. It could be, uh... deprimere... ille... bubula... linter."
Spike - "Debase, the beef, canoe."
punches Dalton
Spike - "Why does that strike me as not right?"

Drusilla - "Spike, come dance?"
Spike - "Give us some peace, would you? Can't you see I'm working? Oh, I'm sorry, kitten. It's just this manuscript. Supposed to hold your cure, but it reads like gibberish. Even Dalton here, the big brain, he can't make heads or tails of it."
Drusilla - "I need to change Miss Edith."
Spike - "Oh, forgive me! You know I can't stand to see you like this. We're runnin' out of time. It's that bloody Slayer! Whenever I turn around she's muckin' up the works."
Drusilla - "Shh. Shh. You'll make it right. I know."

Spike - "Well. Come on, now. Enlighten me."
Dalton - "Uh, well, it looks like Latin, but it's not. I'm not even sure it's, it's a language, actually, I..."
Spike - "Then MAKE IT A LANGUAGE! Isn't that what a transcriber does?!"

Spike - "I want the cure."
Drusilla - "Don't..."
Spike - "Why not? Some people find pain very inspirational."
Drusilla - "He can't help you. Not without... the key."
Spike - "The key? You mean this book is in some kind of code?"
Drusilla - "Yeah."

Spike - "Is that where we'll find this key?"
Drusilla - "Yeah!"
Spike - "I'll send the boys, pronto!"
Drusilla - "Now will you dance?"
Spike - "I'll dance with you, pet."
Spike - "On the Slayer's grave!"

Spike - "This is it then?"
Drusilla - "It hums. I can hear it."
Spike - "Once you're well again, we'll have a coronation down Main Street, and invite everyone, and drink for seven days and seven nights."
Dalton - "What about the Slayer? She almost blew the whole thing for us. She's trouble."
Spike - "You don't say? Trouble?! She's the gnat in my ear! The gristle in my teeth! She's the bloody thorn in my BLOODY SIDE!"
Drusilla - "Spike?"
Spike - "We gotta do something. We'll never complete your cure with that bitch breathing down our necks. I need to bring in the big guns. They'll take care of her once and for all."
Dalton - "Big guns?"
Spike - "The Order of Taraka."
Dalton - "The bounty hunters?!"
Drusilla - "They're coming to my party. Three of them."
Dalton - "Uh, yes, but... The Order of Taraka, I mean... isn't that overkill?"
Spike - "No, I think it's just enough kill."

Drusilla - "He's passing under our feet right now."
Spike - "No worries. We're close to decoding the manuscript. We just need a bit more time."
Drusilla - "Time is ours. It brings the Slayer closer to them."

Spike - "By George, I think he's got it! The key to your cure, ducks. The missing bloody link, it was..."
Drusilla - "Right, right in front of us... the whole time."


What's My Line 2

Spike - "What's the matter, Willy? Don't you trust me?"
Willy - "Oh, yeah. Like a brother."
Spike - "Talk and I'll have your guts for garters."
Willy - "Wild horses couldn't drag it."
Spike - "Oops! Sorry, friend."
Willy - "What are you gonna do with him anyway?"
Spike - "I'm thinkin' maybe dinner and a movie. I don't want to rush into anything. I've been hurt, you know."

Drusilla - "I was dreaming."
Spike - "Of what, pet?"
Drusilla - "We were in Paris. You had a branding iron."
Spike - "I brought you something."
Drusilla - "And there were worms in my baguette."
Spike - "Your sire, my sweet."
Drusilla - "My Angel?"
Spike - "The one and only. Now all we need's the full moon tonight, and he will die, and you will be fully restored. My black goddess. My ripe, wicked plum. It's been..."
Drusilla - "Forever."
Spike and Drusilla kiss
Drusilla - "Spike, let me have him. Hmm? Until the moon."
Spike - "Alright, you can play, but don't kill him. He mustn't die till the ritual."
Drusilla - "Bring him to me."
Drusilla - "You've been a very bad daddy."

Drusilla - "The lamb is caught in the blackberry patch. My mummy ate lemons. Raw."
Drusilla - "She said she loved the way they made her mouth... tingle. Little Anne."
Drusilla - "Her favorite was custard... brandied pears."
Angel - "Dru..."
Drusilla - "Shhh! And pomegranates. They used to make her face and fingers all red. Remember? Hmm? Little fingers. Little hands. Do you?"
Angel - "If I could..."
Drusilla - "Bite your tongue! They used to eat cake, and eggs, and honey. Until you came and ripped their throats out."

Drusilla - "Say 'Uncle'. Oh, that's right, you killed my uncle."
Spike - "That's it, then. Off to church."
Drusilla - "It makes pretty colors."
Spike - "Pft! I'll see him die soon enough. I've never been much for the pre-show."
Angel - "Too bad. That's what Drusilla likes best, as I recall."
Spike - "What's that supposed to mean?"
Angel - "Ask her. She knows what I mean."
Spike - "Well?"
Drusilla - "Shhh! Grrrruff! Bad dog."
Angel - "You shoulda let me talk to him, Dru. Sounds like your boy could use some pointers. She likes to be teased."
Spike - "Keep your hole shut!"
Angel - "Take care of her, Spike. The way she touched me just now? I can tell when she's not satisfied."
Spike - "I said SHUT UP!"
Angel - "Or maybe you two just don't have the fire we had."
Spike - "That's enough."
Drusilla - "Spike, no!"
Drusilla - "Shhh."
Spike - "Oh! Right. Right, you almost got me! Aren't you a 'throw himself to the lions' sort of sap these days. Well, the lions are on to you, baby. See, if I kill you now you go quick, and Dru hasn't got a chance. And if Dru dies your little Rebecca of Sunnyhell Farm and all her mates are spared her coming-out party."
Drusilla - "Spike, the moon is rising. It's time."
Spike - "Too bad, Angelus. Looks like you go the hard way. Along with the rest of this miserable town."

Spike - "Eligor. I name thee. Bringer of war, poisoners, pariahs, grand obscenity."
Spike - "Eligor, wretched master of decay, bring your black medicine."
Drusilla - "Black medicine."
Spike - "Come. Restore your most impious, murderous child."
Drusilla - "Murderous child."
Spike - "From the blood of the sire she is risen."
Spike - "From the blood of the sire, she shall rise again."
Spike - "Right, then! Now we just let them come to a simmering boil, and remove to a low flame."

Willy - "It's payday, pal. I got your Slayer."
Spike - "Are you tripping?! You bring her here?! Now?!"
Willy - "You said you wanted her."
Spike - "In the ground, pinhead! I wanted her dead."
Willy - "Now, that's not what I heard. Word was there was a bounty on her dead or alive."
Spike - "You heard wrong, Willy."
Buffy - "Angel."
Spike - "Yeah. It bugs me, too, seeing him like that. Another five minutes, though, and Angel will be dead, so... I forebear. Don't feel too bad for Angel, though, he's got something you don't have."
Buffy - "What's that?"
Spike - "Five minutes. Patrice!"

Spike (seeing Kendra) - "Who the hell is this?!"

Buffy - "Switch!"
Spike - "I'd rather be fightin' you anyway."
Buffy - "Mutual."

Spike - "Where are you going?"
Willy - "Now, there's a way in which this isn't my fault!"
Spike - "They tricked you."
Willy - "Mm-hm! They were duplicitous!"
Spike - "Well, then I'll only kill you just this once."
Drusilla - "Spike!"

Spike - "Sorry, baby. Gotta go. Hope that was enough."

Drusilla - "Don't worry, dear heart. I'll see that you get strong again. Like me!"

Surprise

(in Buffy's dream) Drusilla - "Happy Birthday, Buffy."

Spike - "Just put it on the table... near the other gifts. Are you dead set on this, pet? Wouldn't you rather have your party in Vienna?"
Drusilla - "But the invitations are sent."
Spike - "Yeah. It's just I've had it with this place. Nothing ever comes off like it's supposed to."
Drusilla - "My gatherings are always perfect. Remember Spain? Hey... The bulls?"
Spike - "I remember, sweet. But Sunnydale's cursed for us. Angel and the Slayer see to that."
Drusilla - "Shhh... I've got good games for everyone. You'll see."
Drusilla - "These flowers... are wrong. They're all... wrong! I can't abide them!"
Spike - "Let's try something different with the flowers then."
Drusilla - "Can I open one? Can I? Can I? Ooo..."
Spike - "Just a peek, love. They're for the party. Do you like it, baby?"
Drusilla - "It reeks of death."
Drusilla - "This will be the best party ever."
Spike - "Why is that?"
Drusilla - "Because...it will be the last."

Drusilla - "You lost it? You... lost my present."

Spike - "It was a bad turn, man. She can't have her fun without the box."

Drusilla - "Make a wish."
Dalton - "What?"
Drusilla - "I'm going to blow out the candles."
Spike - "You might give him a chance to find your lost treasure. He is a wanker, but he's the only one we've got with half a brain. If he fails, you can eat his eyes out of the sockets for all I care."
Dalton - "I'll get it. Please. I swear."
Drusilla - "Okay. Hurry back then."

(Buffy's dream) Drusilla - "Now, now. Hands off my presents."

Drusilla - "More music!"

Spike - "Look what I have for you, ducks."
Drusilla - "Ahh... The best is saved for last."

Drusilla - "Hmm. He's perfect, my darling. Just what I wanted."

Spike - "Ho, ho, ho. What's that, mate?"

Spike - "Yeah. What of it? Do I have to remind you that we're the ones who brought you here?"

Drusilla - "Would you like a party favor?"

Spike - "What's with the bringing? I thought you could just zap people."

Drusilla - "Do it again! Do it again!"

Spike: What? What is it?

Drusilla - "It's delicious. I only dreamed you'd come. Rrrr."
Angel - "Leave her alone."
Spike - "Yeah, that'll work. Now say 'pretty please'."

Drusilla - "Chilling, isn't it? She's so full of good intention."

Angel: Take me instead of her!
Spike - "Uh, you're not clear on the concept, pal. There is no instead. Just first and second."
Drusilla - "And if you go first, you don't get to watch the Slayer die."

Drusilla - "Go!"

Innocence

Spike - "I'm not happy, pet. Angel and the Slayer are still alive. They know where we are, they know about the Judge. We should be vacating."
Drusilla - "Nonsense. They'll not disturb us here. My Angel's too smart to face the Judge again."

Spike - "What's Big Blue up to anyway? He just sits there."
Judge - "I am preparing."
Spike - "Yeah. It's interesting to me that 'preparing' looks a great bit like sitting on your ass. When do we destroy the world already?"

Judge - "My strength grows, and with every life I take it will increase further."
Spike - "So let's take some. I'm bored."

Spike - "Dru?"
Drusilla - "Angel..."
Spike - "Dru? What is it? Dru! Darling... Do you see something?"

Spike - "Are we feeling better, then?"
Drusilla - "I'm naming all the stars."
Spike - "You can't see the stars, love. That's the ceiling. Also, it's day".
Drusilla - "I can see them. But I've named them all the same name. And there's terrible confusion."
Spike - "Did you see any further? Do you know what happens to Angel?"
Angelus - "Well, he moves to New York and tries to fulfill that Broadway dream. It's tough sledding, but one day he's working in the chorus when the big star twists her ankle."
Spike - "You don't give up, do you?"
Angelus - "As long as there's injustice in the world, as long as scum like you is walking... well, rolling the streets... I'll be around. Look over your shoulder. I'll be there."
Spike - "Uh, yeah. Angel, um... look over your shoulder."
Spike - "Hurts, doesn't it?"
Angelus - "Well, you know, it kinda itches a little."
Spike - "Don't just stand there. Burn him."
Angelus - "Gee, maybe he's broken."
Spike - "What the hell is going on?"
Judge - "This one... cannot be burnt. He is clean."
Spike - "Clean? You mean, he's..."
Judge - "There's no humanity in him."
Angelus - "I couldn't have said it better myself."
Drusilla - "Angel."
Angelus - "Yeah, baby. I'm back."

Spike - "Is it really true?"
Angelus - "It's really true."
Drusilla - "You've come home."
Spike - "No more of this 'I've got a soul' crap?"
Angelus - "What can I say, hmm? I was going through a phase."
Spike - "This is great! This is so great!"
Drusilla - "Everything in my head is singing! We're family again. We'll feed. Grrr. And we'll play."
Spike - "I've got to tell you, it made me sick to my stomach seeing you being the Slayer's lap dog."
Drusilla - "How did this happen?"
Angelus - "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."
Spike - "Oh, who cares? What matters is now he's back! Now it's four against one, which are the kind of odds I like to play."
Drusilla - "Psst. We're going to destroy the world. Want to come?"
Angelus - "Yeah. Destroying the world. Great. I'm really more interested in the Slayer."
Spike - "Well, she's in the world, so that should work out."
Angelus - "Give me tonight. Hmm?"
Spike - "What do you mean?"
Angelus - "Lay low for a night. I guarantee you by the time you go public she won't be anything resembling a threat."
Spike - "You've really got a yen to hurt this girl, haven't you?"
Angelus - "She made me feel like a human being. That's not the kind of thing you just forgive."

Spike - "So you didn't kill her then."
Angelus - "Of course not."
Spike - "Now, I know you haven't been in the game for a while, mate, but we still do kill people. Sort of our raison d'etre, you know."
Drusilla - "You don't want to kill her, do you? You want to hurt her. Just like you hurt me."
Angelus - "Nobody knows me like you do, Dru."
Spike - "She'd better not get in our way."
Angelus - "Don't worry about it."
Spike - "I do."

Judge - "I am ready."
Spike - "About time. Have fun."
Angelus - "Too bad you can't come with, huh? I'll be thinkin' of you."
Spike - "I won't be in this chair forever."

Spike - "What happens if your girlfriend shows up?"

Drusilla - "Oh, goody!"

Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered

Spike - "Fancy it, pet?"
Drusilla - "Ahhh. It's beautiful. Mm."
Spike - "Nothing but the best for my gir..."
Angelus - "Happy Valentine's Day, Dru."
Drusilla - "Oh... Angel! It's still warm."
Angelus - "I knew you'd like it. I found it in a quaint little shopgirl."

Spike - "I'll get it."
Angelus - "Done. I know Dru gives you pity access, but you have to admit it's so much easier when I do things for her."
Spike - "You would do well to worry less about Dru and more about that Slayer you've been tramping around with."
Angelus - "Dear Buffy. I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards."
Spike - "Why don't you rip her lungs out? It might make an impression."
Angelus - "Lacks... poetry."
Spike - "It doesn't have to. What rhymes with lungs?"
Drusilla - "Don't worry, Spike. Angel always knows... what speaks to a girl's heart."

Drusilla: Don't fret, kitten. (helps him up) Mummy's here.

Angelus - "I don't know what you're up to, Dru, but it doesn't amuse!"
Drusilla - "If you harm one hair on this boy's head..."
Angelus - "You've gotta be kidding. Him?"
Drusilla - "Just because I finally found a real man..."
Angelus - "I guess I really did drive you crazy."
Drusilla - "Your face is a poem. I can read it."
Xander - "Really? It doesn't say 'spare me' by any chance?"
Drusilla - "Shhh. How do you feel about eternal life?"

Passion

Drusilla: I brought something for you. Poor thing. She's an orphan. Her owner died... without a fight. Do you like her? Hmm? I brought her especially for you... to cheer you up. And I've named her... Sunshine! Open wide. Come on, love. You need to eat something to keep your strength up. Now, rrrrr, open up for mummy."
Spike - "I won't have you feeding me like a child, Dru."
Angelus - "Why not? She already bathes you, carries you around and changes you like a child."
Drusilla - "Why, Angel. Where have you been? The sun is almost up, and it can be so hurtful. We were worried."
Spike - "No, we weren't."
Drusilla - "You must forgive Spike. He's just a bit testy tonight. Doesn't get out much anymore."
Angelus - "Well, maybe next time I'll bring you with me, Spike. Might be handy to have you around if I ever need a really good parking space."
Spike - "Have you forgotten that you're a bloody guest in my bloody home?"
Angelus - "And as a guest, if there's anything I can do for you... Any... responsibility I can assume while you're spinning your wheels... Anything I'm not already doing, that is."
Spike - "That's enough!"
Drusilla - "Aww... You two boys... fightin' over me and all. Makes a girl feel..."
Spike - "Dru, what is it, pet?"
Drusilla - "The air. It worries. Someone... an old enemy is seeking help... help to destroy our happy home. Ohhhh.."

Drusilla - "Miss Sunshine here tells me you had a visit today. But she worries. She wants to know what you and the mean teacher talked about.

Spike - "Are you insane?! We're supposed to kill the bitch, not leave gag gifts in the friends' beds."
Drusilla - "But, Spike, the bad teacher was going to restore Angel's soul."
Spike - "What if she did? If you ask me, I find myself preferring the old Buffy-whipped Angelus. This new, improved one is not playing with a full sack. I love a good slaughter as much as the next bloke, but his little pranks will only leave us with one incredibly brassed-off Slayer!"

Spike - "Uh-uh. No fair going into the ring unless he tags you first."

I Only Have Eyes For You

Drusilla: Wow! Look. Jasmine."
Angelus - "Night blooming."
Drusilla - "Like us. Oh, Angel, it's fairyland. Ooh!"
Spike - "It's paradise. Big windows, lovely gardens. It'll be perfect when we want the sunlight to kill us."
Angelus - "If you don't like it, Spike, hit the stairs and go. Take a stand, man."
Spike - "Well, our old place was just fine till you went and had it burned down."
Angelus - "Things change, Spikey. You gotta roll with the punches. Well, actually, you pretty much got that part down, haven't you?"
Spike - "Very funny, mate."
Angelus - "What can I say? I just love to see you smile, buddy."
Spike - "Yeah, you're a giver."

Drusilla - "Maybe I'll sleep underground. Dig myself a little burrow."
Spike - "What about your pretty dress, sweet? It'll get all dirty."
Drusilla - "Then I'll sleep naked. Like the animals do."
Angelus - "You know, I'm suddenly liking this plan."
Spike - "Fortunately, nobody cares what you like, mate."
Angelus - "Oh, yeah? Let's ask Dru."
Drusilla - "There's a gate! It's opening!"
Angelus - "Incoming! I love when she does this."
Spike - "What gate, pet? What do you see?"
Drusilla - "It's black. It wants her."
Angelus - "Wants who?"
Drusilla - "The Slayer. It's time, Angel. She's ready for you now. She's dancing. Dancing with death."
Spike - "Big deal. He won't do anything. Our man Angel here likes to talk but he's not much for action. All hat and no cattle."
Angelus - "I don't know about that. I think this whole Slayer thing has run its course. I'm ready to focus my energy elsewhere."
Spike - "Really?"
Angelus - "Oh, yeah! What, with you being Special Needs Boy, I figure I should stick close to home. You and Dru can always use another pair of hands."

Spike - "You might want to let up. They say when you've drawn blood, you've exfoliated."
Angelus - "What do you know about it? I'm the one who was friggin' violated. You didn't have this thing in you."
Drusilla - "What was it? A demon?"
Angelus - "Love!"
Drusilla - "Poor Angel."
Angelus - "Let's get outta here. I need a real vile kill before sunup to wipe this crap out of my system."
Drusilla - "Of course. We'll find you a nice toddler. Want to come, pet?"
Angelus - "No can do, Dru. I'm sure he'd be hell on wheels, but we don't have much time. Gotta travel light. Sorry. Try to have fun without me."
Spike - "Oh, I will. Sooner than you think."

Becoming I

(flashback) Drusilla - "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned."
Drusilla - "It's been two days since my last confession. Father?"
Angelus - "That's not very long."
Drusilla - "Oh, Father, I'm so afraid."
Angelus - "The Lord is very forgiving. Tell me your sins."
Drusilla - "I had... I've been seeing again, Father. Yesterday, the men were going to work in the mine. I had... a terrible fright. My stomach all tied up, and I saw this horrible... crash. My mummy said to keep my peace, it didn't mean nothing. But this morning... they had a cave-in. Two men died."
Angelus - "Go on."
Drusilla - "Me mum says... I'm cursed. My seeing things is an affront to the Lord, that only he's supposed to see anything before it happens. But I don't mean to, Father, I swear! I swear! I try to be pure in his sight. I don't want to be an evil thing."
Angelus - "Oh, hush, child. The Lord has a plan for all creatures. Even a Devil child like you."
Drusilla - "A Devil?
Angelus - "Yes! You're a spawn of Satan. All the Hail Marys in the world aren't going to help. The Lord will use you and smite you down. He's like that."
Drusilla - "What can I do?"
Angelus - "Fulfill his plan, child. Be evil. Just give in."
Drusilla - "No! I want to be good. I want to be pure."
Angelus - "We all do, at first. The world doesn't work that way."
Drusilla - "Father... I beg you... Please... Please, help me."
Angelus - "Very well. Ten Our Fathers and an Act of Contrition. Does that sound good?"
Drusilla - "Yes. Yes, Father. Thank you."
Angelus - "The pleasure was mine. And my child..."
Drusilla - "Yes?"
Angelus - "God is watching you."

Spike: Nice walk, pet?

Drusilla - "I met an old man. Didn't like him. He got stuck in my teeth. But then the Moon started whispering to me... All sorts of dreadful things."
Angelus - "Well, what did it say?"
Spike - "Oh. Look who's awake."
Angelus - "What did the Moon tell you? Did you have a vision? Is something coming?"
Drusilla - "Oh, yeah. Something terrible. Psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst..."
Angelus - "Where?"
Drusilla - "At the museum. A tomb... with a surprise inside."
Angelus - "You can see all that in your head?"
Spike - "No, you ninny. She read it in the morning paper."
Angelus - "Oh, my."
Drusilla - "That's what's been whispering to me. Shh."
Angelus - "Oh, yeah. Don't worry, though. Soon it'll stop. Soon it'll scream."

Spike - "It's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big."
Angelus - "Spike, boy, you never did learn your history."
Spike - "Let's have a lesson, then."
Angelus - "Acathla the demon came forth to swallow the world. He was killed by a virtuous knight who pierced the demon's heart before he could draw a breath to perform the act. Acathla turned to stone, as demons sometimes do, and was buried where neither man nor demon would want to look. Unless of course they're putting up low-rent housing. Boys..."
Drusilla - "He fills my head. I can't hear anything else."
Spike - "Let me guess. Someone pulls out the sword..."
Angelus - "Someone worthy..."
Spike - "Mm. The demon wakes up, and wackiness ensues."
Drusilla - "He will swallow the world."
Angelus - "And every creature living on this planet will go to Hell. My friends... we're about to make history... end."

Drusilla - "Spike? Spike, my sweet! The fun's about to begin."

Spike - "Someone wasn't worthy."
Angelus - "Damn it!"
Drusilla - "This is so... disappointing!"
Angelus - "There must be something I missed. The incantations, the blood... I don't know!"
Drusilla - "What are we going to do?"
Angelus - "What we always do in a time of trouble: turn to an old friend. We'll have our Armageddon. I swear!"

Drusilla - "Enough. Look at me, Dearie. Be... in my eyes. Be... in me. Night-night. Let's get what we came for, dears."

Becoming II

Spike - "Hello, cutie."

Spike - "Now, you hold on a second!"
Spike - "Hey! White flag here. I quit."
Buffy - "Let me clear this up for you. We're mortal enemies. We don't get time-outs."
Spike - "You want to go around, pet, I'll have a gay old time of it. You want to stop Angel... we're gonna have to play this a bit differently."
Buffy - "What are you talking about?"
Spike - "I'm talking about your ex, pet. I'm talking about putting him in the bloody ground."
Buffy - "This has gotta be the lamest trick you guys have ever thought up."
Spike - "He's got your Watcher. Right now, he's probably torturing him."
Buffy - "What do you want?"
Spike - "I told you. I want to stop Angel. (snickers) I want to save the world."
Buffy - "Okay. You do remember that you're a vampire, right?"
Spike - "We like to talk big. Vampires do. 'I'm going to destroy the world.' That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people. Billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs. It's all right here. But then someone comes along with a vision. With a real... passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Goodbye, Picadilly. Farewell, Leicester Bloody Square. You know what I'm saying?"
Buffy - "Okay, fine. You're not down with Angel. Why would you ever come to me?"
Spike - "I want Dru back. I want it like it was before he came back. The way she acts around him..."

Buffy - "I lost a friend tonight!"
Spike - "I wasn't in on that raiding party."
Buffy - "And I may lose more! The whole earth may be sucked into Hell, and you want my help 'cause your girlfriend's a big ho? Well, let me take this opportunity to not care."
Spike - "I can't fight them both alone, and neither can you!"
Buffy - "I hate you."
Spike - "And I'm all you've got."
Buffy - "All right. Talk."
Spike - "I'm just gonna kill this guy... Oh, right."

Spike - "What, your mum doesn't know?"
Joyce - "Know what?"
Buffy - "That I'm, uh... in a band. A-a rock band with Spike here."
Spike - "Right. She plays the, the triangle."
Buffy - "Drums."
Spike - "Drums, yeah. She's, uh, hell on the old skins, you know."
Joyce - "Hmm. And, uh, what do you do?"
Spike - "Well, I sing."

Spike - "One of Angel's boys."
Buffy - "Yeah, probably watching me. Or you."
Spike - "Yeah. He won't get a chance to tattle on us now."

Spike - "Um... you hit me with an ax one time. Remember? Uh, 'get the hell away from my daughter.'"

Spike - "Simple. You let me and Dru skip town, I help you kill Angel."
Joyce - "Angel? Your boyfriend?"
Buffy - "Forget about Drusilla. She doesn't walk."
Spike - "There's no deal without Dru."
Buffy - "She killed Kendra."
Spike - "Dru bagged a Slayer? She didn't tell me! Hey, good for her! Though not from your perspective, I suppose."

Spike - "Look. This deal works for me one way. Full stop. Me and Dru for Angel."

Spike - "I'll take her out of the country. You'll never hear from us again, I bloody well hope."

Spike - "Now, now, don't let's lose our temper."
Angelus - "Keep out of it, sit 'n' spin."
Spike - "Look, you cut him up, you'll never get your answers."
Angelus - "Since when did you become so levelheaded?"
Spike - "Right about the time you became so pig-headed. You have your way with him, you'll never get to destroy the world. And I don't fancy spending the next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet. There are other ways."
Angelus - "Enlighten me."
Spike - "Hmm. Drusilla? Sweetheart? Do you want to play a game?"

Drusilla - "Is that better? Hmm? Poor thing. Let's see what's inside. Of course... Look at me.... Mm-mm-mm-mm... Be... in me... Hmm. See with your heart.
Giles - "Jenny! I thought I'd lost you."
Dru (as Jenny) - "Shh. I'll never leave you."
Giles - "We have to get out of here."
Dru - "No-no-no-no-no. Slowly."
Giles - "It can't be you."
Dru - "Did you tell Angel? About the ritual?"
Giles - "No. We have to get... him away from Acathla."
Dru - "Why? Is he close to figuring it out?"
Giles - "Later."
Dru - "Tell me what to do."
Dru - "It's all right. We'll be together... finally. We'll have everything we never got to have... Never got to feel... Just tell me what to do."
Giles - "We have to get Angel away from Acathla."
Dru - "Angel himself? He's the key?"
Giles - "H-h-his, his blood... H-he mustn't..."
Dru - "Shh. Mm."
Angelus - "Blood. Of course. The blood on my hands must be my own. I am the key that will open up the door. My blood. My life. Okay. Kill him."
Spike - "Uh, but what if he's lying?"
Angelus - "Yeah. Good point. Alright, don't kill him. You know, I kinda like having you watch my back. It's kinda like old times."
Spike - "Uh, Drusilla..."
Angelus - "Honey..."
Spike - "We are finished here, ducks."
Drusilla - "Sorry. I was in the moment."

Spike - "Painful, isn't it?"

Spike - "I don't want to hurt you, baby. Doesn't mean I won't."

Drusilla - "Oh... Here he comes."

Spike - "Sorry, baby. Wish there was another way."

Spike - "God, he's gonna kill her."

SERIES III - onwards