welcome to the world of no focus, no talent, no holds barred rock girl...
I got rid of the clique. Who the hell am I to judge people? It went against everything I thought I stood for. Instead, I thought I would make a club, not a clique, an open club, whoever wants to join, or a web/blog/diary ring, "Rock Girl's Minions." I already have a blogring on xanga titled that. After today, I fell into my depression stage again. Yes, again. And then I thought, "This is wrong, this is what people sort of did to me." Anti-Lauren, without knowing me. I won't do that. The page is deleted, and the links to it are gone. Every time I see the word "poser" written about her, that I typed myself, it feels like a knife in my gut, twisting around, and going deeper. I can't stand that feeling, and if I want to sleep tonight, I need to apologise. I was on an ego-trip, I think. I don't know what was wrong with me, but it won't happen again. And if it does, leave me a note in my guestbook and tell me, please, just call me on it. I need sleep, I have to go.
ta ta for now :)
Lauren
|
