| Goodnight Elisabeth From "Recovering The Satellites" I was wasted in the afternoon Waiting on a train I woke up in pieces Elisabeth had disappeared again I wish you were inside of me I hope that you're OK. I hope you're resting quietly I just wanted to say... CHORUS Good, goodnight Elisabeth Goodnight Elisabeth, goodnight Good, goodnight Elisabeth Goodnight Elisabeth, goodnight We couldn't all be cowboys So some of us are clowns Some of us are dancers on the midway We roam from town to town. I hope that everybody Can find a little flame Me? I just say my prayers And I light myself on fire And walk out on the wire once again CHORUS I will wait for you in Baton Rouge I'll miss ya down in New Orleans I'll wait for you while she slips in something Comfortable I'll miss you while I'm slipping in between If you wrap yourself in daffodils I will wrap myself in pain If you're the queen of California I am the King of the Rain CHORUS The moon's a satellite and Won't you fall down on me now Won't you fall down on me? Oh come, come fall down on me now Won't you fall down on me? 'Cause I'm all alone You ain't coming home We just settle down, down, into bone I said I'm all alone And you ain't coming home We just settle down, down, down into bone |
| This is gonna take a while. I've been avoiding writing about this song because it's so intensely personal to me. AD says the song is about a girlfriend of his who just couldn't cope with him living the rock star life. She was convinced he was sleeping around while on the road, no matter how faithful he actually was. And from the way he sings this song at concerts, you can tell he loved/s her very much. He used "goodnight" instead of 'goodbye" because it doesn't sound as final, even though it's a chapter long since closed. Loving in vain has now shaped my existence, and that's why this song cuts through my soul. There are numerous pages on this site where I talk about my one big love that I've regretted losing for the past four years. She is my Elisabeth. The only reason that relationship did not work out was that we were too young. She was 16, I was 18. We made it through 4 years of absolute happiness. It just worked. I really can't explain it. There were no games. No stress. We just worked together and fit. Neither one of us really had to try until I went away to school, and then she went to Florida for an intership. That's when everything went haywire and we decided that living this life was not what we wanted. Looking back, I scoff at my immaturity. To not have had the foresight to just deal with it for a couple more years irritates me. I'll never forget the night we walked away from each other. I'll never forget the 4 unbelievable years we spent toegether. And I'll never regret the 4 years since where I've tried to move on. And now with me on the verge of moving out of state, more or less to get myself out of the same circles that lead me back to the beginning of my despair, I'm forced to realize that it really is over. Permanently dead. It's a very sobering experience to realize the one thing you've propped up your existence on doesn't really exist. And I hear this song and it makes me think of me and how I miss her and wish things had never changed. I wish and wish and wish. I sound like a 5 year old. But this song speaks to me because I wake up in pieces every morning, waiting for that train. A train that isn't coming. That never existed. But I'll walk out on the wire, on fire, trying to find someone/ something to turn my attention from my past. And I'll miss her while I'm trying to move on and this dual existence clouds and confuses and in the end I'm back to being alone because no one can stand being second best for very long. So I am at the point where, if I know how it's going to end, why begin? Why bring another person into the picture only to hurt them once I realize it's not going to work. One relationship took me a whole year to realize that it was pointless for me to try. Why suck someone in only to let them down? I don't want to be that person. The creator of hurt. And as much as I want to move on, I can't help but look around every corner hoping she's there. I can't help staring at the phone praying it will ring. I can't help opening up my eyes in the morning and wishing she was there. And that's not fair to anyone. So I'll stay alone. And every night say goodnight to my Elisabeth. Waiting, praying, hoping, for the next day's light to shine on me and free me from this prison I've created for myself. Won't you fall down? |