In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed (or
that the human race is suffering from sheer stupidity), here are some 
actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping. Do not use near water.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner!  No purchase necessary.  Details inside.
 
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions:  Use like regular soap.
 
Some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.

On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head.

On Tesco's Tiramisu desert (Printed on the bottom of the box):
Do not turn upside down.

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating

On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
 
On Boots' Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.

On Nytol (a sleep aid):
Warning: may cause drowsiness.

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning keep out of children.
 
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On a Japanese food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.

On Sainsbury's Peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
 
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.