Read your book upside down and see if anyone notices.
Have a staring contest with your shoes.
Tie your shoes repeatedly. If your teacher mentions it say, "But I don't want to trip." Act surprized he would question this. Due to your shock, repeat tying.
Stare at the ceiling.
Read from right to left.
Mutter to yourself.
Move your lips, this really annoys people.
Discretely let one, watch your classmates react. Blame the teacher.
If the teacher leaves the room, get everyone to change seats, when he/she returns everyone act normal.
Tap morse code to your friends.
Ask to go to the bathroom, and don;t come back.
Ask to go to the bathroom and don't go.
Bring comics as reading material.
Laugh silently about your book and fall over, people will notice.
Attempt to learn the alhpabet backwards.
If you have to read the book for class (as in, it wasn't your choice of book) complain that you already read it, and that it sucked. Recommend a book like "Crime and Punishment" Bring it as a substitue, and don't read it.
Ask what the diffence between a verb and an adverb is. Never catch on.
Same with the difference between "effect" and "affect". Not even they know that one.
Use your eraser to clean your shoes. Works better if you take them off. I have actually done this one.
Braid your own hair (guy or girl).
Write on your hands. Write "this message will self-destruct in 5 seconds".
Pretend you have x-ray vision. Look through your hands, and other peoples clothes.
Hum very quietly a song that will stick in peoples hands. Try, "The Wheels on the Bus" or something equally interesting.
Who're you?
I think I forgot to tell you that I invited my entire graduating class.
You're WHAT religion?
How you get red wine out of White silk again?
I have to go to the bathroom, oops wait, nevermind.
I take thee, Bart, to be my lawfully wedded toad....
(To the groom's mother) I'm sorry, you'll have to leave, this is a family wedding.
Hey, did you know that the best man was the first guy I ever...oh you DIDN'T know that, nevermind.
Wow, the Maid of Honour is HOT!
Aw, isn't the flower girl cute, no honey, get your finger out of your nose.
Okay, now what?
Umm ,dear, why are you wearing shorts?
Whoops, I fogot.
Sorry I'm late, lets get this over with.
I thought YOU were getting the Priest.
Hiccup, I thought there was more wine around than this.
How'd this dog get in here.
What do mean I WON'T?!?!?!?!?!
Sob sob sob sob sob sob sob sob.
