| You know you're not at a sheltered middle school anymore when.... |
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| The word "pig" doesnt refer to a farm animal. "Trip" is not something you do over your shoelaces. "Have you taken your medication recently?" is a serious question. To everyone around you, the letters a-d-d spell A.D.D., not add. A "bowl" isnt something out of which to eat cereal. Your therapy group is having a party, and the guy next to you is drinking his sprite from a shot glass he found in his jacket pocket. Students suggest "Bongmaking 101" as a class offering for next semester. Your english class makes a list of monsters/things that are evil, and the principal's name is first on the list. You do a drug use study for your statistics class, and students report using illegal drugs up to 30 times a week. If you hear someone talking about what he dropped last night, you can bet it wasnt his pencil. You hear "FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE!!!!! SUCK MY DICK!!!!!!" being shouted at the principal by a girl with tattoos covering her arms and shoulders. One of the girls in your girls' therapy group, well, isnt so much a girl as the rest of you... You bring in homeade brownies and candy for the entire school, and the kids are disappointed because the brownies arent "special." You need a key to get the nutmeg from the kitchen- its locked in a cabinet so kids cant snort it. Conversations start with "so there was this 5 ft giant glass bong..." Ricke wants to write his name RickE on school papers, but is prohibited from doing so because it might be considered a drug reference. Kids estimate that 80-90% of the school is gay, lesbian, bi, or transgender. A pacifier isnt just for your little brother. "E" isnt just a letter of the alphabet. People dont take the long way to Anna's Tacqueria for the exercise. Your crush's view on bestiality is "dont knock it till youve tried it." "Adam" isnt just the name of the guy who sits next to you in bio (who, by the way, wears all black, (even his skirt and his makeup, and wears a dog collar, and is appropriately named Adam- and no I dont mean as in Eve.) Taking your therapist to the sex shop is a perfectly normal lunchtime activity. Your other crush gets a hand job while in the audience of the school-sponsored trip to the Huntington Theatre Company. The girl your math teacher is sleeping with writes on the blackboard every morning that he wets his bed. A "fishbowl" isn't something in which to keep fish (unless of course you're Sam.) A "dime" isnt something you need to make a telephone call. Rumor has it that girl you took a walk with at the beginning of school, who told you her view on things was "if you've got it, flaunt it" has had 7 abortions. |