- Sherlock Holmes
"Black holes are where God divided by zero."- Steven Wright
"I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it."- Groucho Marx (1895-1977)
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible."- Walt Disney (1901-1966)
"You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it."
- Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936)
"Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down."- Jimmy Durante
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."
- Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)
"The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life."- Frank Zappa
"Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome."- Isaac Asimov
"It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts."- G. B. Burgin
"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens."- Jimi Hendrix
"A witty saying proves nothing."- Voltaire (1694-1778)
"I have often regretted my speech, never my silence."- Xenocrates (396-314 B.C.)
"It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion."- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough."- Mario Andretti
"I'll sleep when I'm dead."- Warren Zevon
"If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win."
- Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)
"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die."
- Mel Brooks
"Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so."- Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)
"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity."- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows."- Aristotle Onassis (1906-1975)
"We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?"- Niels Bohr (1885-1962)
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation."- H. H. Munro (Saki) (1870-1916)
"Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler."- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid."- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"Everything has been figured out, except how to live."- Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)
"In the end, everything is a gag."- Charlie Chaplin (1889-1977)
"I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known."- Walt Disney (1901-1966)
"You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty."- Sacha Guitry (1885-1957)
"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to."
- Elvis Presley (1935-1977)
"No Sane man will dance."- Cicero (106-43 B.C.)
"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you."- Carl Gustav Jung (1875-1961)
"Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate."- Thomas Jones
"You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone."
- Al Capone (1899-1947)
"The gods too are fond of a joke."- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)