The Baron of Beige

Thought of the day...

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Before you go on to read the wonderful thoughts provided by our very own Baron of Beige, I think that it is very important to know a little bit about the Baron.

Contrary to popular belief he was not born in the Beige Kingdom. However, his dedication and loyalty to the colour Beige and for the spread of the Bogo Pogo throughout the Kingdom has earnt him his distinguished title.

The self professed king of easy listening, the Baron is known to listen to the Greatest Hits of George Micheal and the Strictly Ballroom CD one after the other.

The Baron of Beige will soon be departing the Beige Kingdom in a quest to spread Beigeness to the Netherlands.
He will be greatly  missed by the Beige family, but his work is necessary and must go on.

Warning: Due to his limited brain capacity, it will be highly unlikely the the Baron will have a thought for every day.

Some thoughts may be of an adult nature and so should be viewed in discretion.

29/7/00
I received this email from the Baron a while ago. It completely captures the essence of the Baron, who despite recent reports, is just a man, not a superhero.

The George Carlin Theory:
"The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death. What's that? A bonus?

I think that the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch and you go to work.

You work for forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school.

You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities.

You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, spend your last nine months floating...... and then you finish ass as an orgasm."

Here are a few pertinent thoughts from Madame Spank's friend, who I personally have never met but have on good authority that she would make  a good ambassador for the Beige Kingdom.

"Why is it called Tourist Season if you are not allowed to shoot them?"

" If you choke a smurf, what colour do they turn?"

"If you took an oriental person and spun them around, would they become disoriented?"
We apologise to anyone who is offended by the above thought.

8/9/00  DIRECT FROM BEIGELAND!!
"Toilet Paper is a gift from God. Use it wisely.