Well it ended up taking 3 months befotre I managed to get out and about again - where the fuck does time go? is there something somewhere sucking all mine away? 'cos i'm bolloxed if I know where those 3 months went, no that's a lie I know where they went: work basically. I'm a manager for a firm of landscapers and and Spring is obviously a mental time of year for us - so 2nd time round got just as nervous as first time really but only 'till we got out of my road and then started to calm down a bit. I can't help thinking that that whole rush thang' is part of the buzz, it is just like coming up on some really really good coke, that whole rushing, adrenalin, intensity trip you know? Maybe you dont know and I've just pissed you off by giving a big fat thumbs up to drugs, if so then I won't apologise i;ll just state that I am fully aware of the detrimental possibilities from ANY kind of drug but that I think a right place, right time attitude is a good thing and for validation I would refer you to nigh on every culture that has existed as far back as we can accurately comment, all of which have developed some form of mood altering substance to get people off their tits so I think it's a fairly safe assumption that it's an integral part of the human condition.
Well a drugs rant was certainly not what I expected to churn out...........
So lets change the subject back to that 2nd night out again. Where was I ? Oh yeah, so as soon as we got out of my road I started to calm down agin, only to get all edgy and freaky headed once we got in the pub. Going in and getting a drink was ok it was after that I started to get weirded out. I noticed people were looking a me - now this pub is a gay/lesbian/bi/tg place and totally cool with my tribe so it wasn't the "oh my god I've been discovered" vibe, but - people were appraising me and I couldn't work out if they were thinking "You must be fucking joking" or "Yeah, that's good" Who knows? I don't and before too long it faded away anyway. And then ? Well then it just felt so normal, so right and so no big deal that I just had a really fucking good time, bit drunk, bit of dancing, good chat, met a new tv and yeah had a real good time. It is so fucking wonderful just to be Purple without any constraint or fear. Unreal.
Can I get my bitchy nails out now? Aw come on lets do a bit of character asassisnation especially when I've only got appearance to go on, please.....? Tough luck I'm off and running baby.................
Two big fat caveats first:
1 I am not decrying these people from being who they are and having the courage, self-belief and sheer balls to go out there and be it. Far from it, it should be patently obvious that I admire and respect them all.
2 I make no claim to gorgeousness/passability or anything in relation to myself and anyone who has seen Purple out and about has the right to make the sort of coments I'm about to make.
Niceties over ???????????
OK, so what the fuck is it with most of the TV's I've come seem? Where do they get this farcical, exagerrated version of feminiity? For fucks sake do any of them actually look in the mirror before they leave home ? Do none of them realise that all those dramatic exagerrated gestures and posings just look fucking stupid. You know I don't go out to come across as some caricatured hybrid of Frankie Howard/ Julian Clary and Larry Fucking Grayson, I go out to be the Purple side of Adam not a friggin' cartoon. Ooh it appears I'm a bit angry about that !
mmmmmm......food for thought
night
Purple
x
