(FebruarY!)




February 28, 2002

Go RAPE my guestbook ... NOW !!

Hahahahahaha Petro just asked me if I was jealous of him... HAHAHAHAHA! That's classic... Could someone PLEASE tell me why in the world I would be jealous of him? *sighs* That's tooooo funny. Anyhoo, on with my boring life... I'm actually in a GREAT mood right now. I can't remember the last time I was this happy... I'm just all giddy and hyper, I feel like I'm 5 and at Dairy Queen getting a sunday (yeah, I was one of those weird children who would probably have pissed themselves at the thought of ice cream). I had a good talk (well, sorta... yeah) with Travis after school today at his house... and then I just fell alseep in his arms... I feel so much better about everything, the world has seemed to float away and it feels like the beginning of the year again. I don't even know how to describe it. Of course I'm going to wake up tomorrow and feel like SHIT... but oh well, I'm happy now, so don't ruin it.

Today was so weird, I think wearing bright colours and monkey slippers to school really cheered me up... Not really, I just like to think that things like slippers can cheer me up. I got sent down to the office first block (math), I was expecting a lecture since I'd been warned if I did one thing wrong they'd take further action with that school thingy... but Mr. Freeman just made cracks about my slippers and danced around and then left... He's so weird... lol Oh well, I didn't get in trouble so *pfffft* to anyone who has Mr. Blain or Mrs. Baily as their vice P ;) Ummmm... I spent PE in the tech wing with Fumiko, Dave and Amanda M because my class was supposed to go to some frizbee thing and I didn't know about it... I'm going to get in shit for it tomorrow. Nothing left to say except... PEEEEEEEENIS!!


Thought of toasters... 02/28/2002, 6:44pm.


February 27, 2002

Sorry, I just HAD to put this up, Duncan, you're a sick sick boy.


I just got off the phone with my sister. I miss her so much... lol, I never even really realised it until she called. I saw her on Saturday when I went down to Victoria but we didn't really get a chance to talk. So I didn't realise how great talking to her really is until now. Ohhh well. . . . So, school was... boring today. I slid around school like a zombie and fell over a lot. Some guy even asked me if I was drunk at one point... it made me laugh for a second and then I immedeatly forgot about it... *shrugs* I spent math class hiding in my hoodie, eating banana candies and doing my CAPP homework. Pooooo on you Mr. Harvey I still don't care about your class.... After school I went to Vallue Village with Travis and Brad. I got me a greeeen zip up jacket with white stripes down the sleeves... you know, the classic track suit type thing? It's SKAWESOME (yay Theresa!) and I love it so much already. I think I might even wear it tomorrow *giggles* Orange and green! I can be a pumpkin! ARGH!! My eyebrow is soooo itchy (where my spike is) and it's driving me craaazy... *bursts into tears* ...Fuck, fuck fuck, I am in the weirdest mood now... I'm almost a hyper depressed... I feel so empty and shitty yet I can't help but wish someone was home so I could scream "PEEEENIS" at them. Yes, I'm inmature, lay off. Anyways... I should be off to my little hole, I'll see all you lovely people in my dreams tonight.


Thought of toasters... 02/27/2002, 9:11pm.


February 26, 2002

Today licked some major balls. I don't think there are even balls as big, hairy and smelly enough to lick that would even come close. You following me alright? =P ...Guess what my GREAT school is trying to do to me now... Send me away... No no wait, I believe Mrs. Jossuls exact words were "We'd LOVE to keep you here Jesse, but we must take action and put you somewhere else." Right. You'd love to have me stay... Sure... And how well do you know me? Oh, you've looked at my report cards since grade 5 eh? That sure makes up for lost time. I'm glad you already know me well enough to say you'd LOOOVE for me to stay. For those of you who are completely lost....... I might get sent to VAST or 5 Acres (alternate schools for DISTURBED (hehe) or disfunctional children...). Basically they're saying I'm stupid and if I don't "smarten up" I have to leave. Well FUCK YOU too. "Have a nice day Jesse, I'll see you tomorrow!" Yes, after telling me that, and yelling at me, I'm sure I'll have a WONDERFUL day! Oh! And I LOVE YOU TOO MRS JOSSUL! I know they're just trying to help, but don't try and be my friend, I really don't want you to even pretend to like me... I sat in her office for almost an hour. That's an hour of her bitching about my behavior and grades and attitude and so on, and so forth. I felt like shooting her in the face with a shot gun. That would have made me so very happy. Mr. Harvey... It all rolls back to good 'ole Mr. Harvey.... I had him for Science last semester (oops failed) and then again this semester for Math. It's the guy's first year here and both semesters he gets me and Travis together in a class. He hates us. He doesn't only hate us... I think he plans to kill us one day... I really think he'd take pleasure in watching us suffer. So anyways, apparently he cares about my education, and to show he cares he complains to the admins that something has to be done about me or he'll burst. So of course, now the admins are doing something... Getting rid of me. THANKS A LOT MR HARVEY! =D *sighs* I'm supposed to talk to my mom about it tonight. What am I supposed to say to her? "Hi mom, guess what! I failed all my classes last semester except one... I got an A in it though! But see, the thing is, if I keep on with my "style" they're booting me out of school!" No, I don't think so. It's just not happening that way... I'm just going to wait until the school tells her... That way she can freak out when I'm not around and I'll just have to listen through a lecture.... I hate it how parents say "You can tell me anything, I won't get mad" yet at that moment they're driving their fist into their hand... The day I can tell my mom anything is the day I grow up and have nothing bad to tell her. Fuck, I think I'm going to cry again... Yay for being a girl and being so FUCKING emotional all the FUCKING time... Someone shoot me... I hate me life... Please just SHOOT ME.

On a lighter note... I got The Crow (yes Lara, the crow!) and B&B by Less Than Jake yesterday after school....

Excuse me while I go find someone to kill me............


Thought of toasters... 02/26/2002, 7:33pm.


February 24, 2002

I have a monkey! I have a monkey! I have a monkey hey hey hey hey! It's big and pink and wow... it's so cool. It's almost bigger than me... It's fatter, but yeah... Anyhoo, yesterday I ended up going to Victoria. I'm so glad I went, I had an awesome time... I met this couple, Andrew and Amanda, and we hung out for most of the time. They were really nice... Ummmm... When I got there the first thing I did was get 'lost' in the crowd (SO MANY PEOPLE ahhh) so I was separated from my mom and I could wander. (I took a few pictures so I'll post them when they get developed) "There ain't no power like the power of the people and the power of the people say STOP!" *sighs* I finally remembered it... I was going crazy trying to remember what everyone was chanting... Oh yeah.. I was getting somewhere... There was this big blue tent near the back (the hippy tent, where I met Amanda and Andrew) and you walk in and you're immediatly high, there's carpet and a wood stove, people linning the sides with dogs or just by themselves and in the middle was a small circle of people drumming. I loved it in there (not because of the drugs, but mmmm that made it funner) So I stayed in there most of the time, more and more people came in and it got kind of crowed, but most people were scared off... I danced around to the music with Amanda for a bit until I realised I had to go... Ummmmmm.... Afterwards I went to VV's with my mom and I got my monkey, the shirt I'm wearing now, and some monkey slippers... hehe. Ohhhh GUESS WHAT! Travis got me All Hallow's EP!! (AFI) I've been wanting it for awhile, I was even about to buy it yesterday... and he got it for me... yay I'm so happy... =)

MONKEY MONKEY MONKEY!!!


Thought of toasters... 02/24/2002, 11:52am.


February 22, 2002

Alright, first EVERYONE has (yes, there is no choice) to go here NOW!! Lara sent me the link yesterday and it's fucking hilarious! If you don't go I will have to shoot you... *glares*

Okee, now, I do have a life, somewhere, so let's talk about it! Yesterday was course selection day, yay for everyone's favorite day of the year! So I missed math to go to the whole talking to lecture thing by Mrs. Gates.... It was boring as hell and I wanted to die the whole time, but as I was asking Scott to shoot me Miss. Storey yelled at me... Pfffft. I skipped second block with Travis and Steve, it was interesting to say the least, I do recall a caff table race at one point... Third block after lunch was PE, I went to that, oh yay the weight room, because lifting weights is hard and all... *rolls eyes* ...4th block was CAPP 9, and all the grade 9's were getting their selection thingy so Mr. Mack let me leave. So I spent the whole class talking to Steve in the library.

Today... today... First block was... oh, English, BORING. It sucked, like always, Mr Zandee can be a prick sometimes. Oh well, I have a project I get to do soon and it's about music so I can finally make people listen to AFI without having to hold them down... mwhahahaha! Hur hur huuuuur... Math was second, it was boring because I got moved to the front courner, but that didn't last that long so *PFFFT* on you Mr. Harvey. No one cares about CAPP so on to last block which was PE. Doesn't matter though because class was spent in the caff watching the hockey game on the big screen! YAY WE WOOOON! 7-1! Oh yeah... CANADA ROCKS!

One last thing (I promise) ..... I just thought I'd mention that there's this rally against the provintial government tomorrow in Victoria. I WAS going to go... but something just came up this very second and I've decided to stay home.... I still want to go, but at the same time the thought of leaving drives me mad.... =( Aaaaand, if you haven't yet.... GO HERE!!


Thought of toasters... 02/22/2002, 11:48pm.


February 20, 2002

Wow, my mom just left for Vancouver... She just told me now, as she's leaving that she won't be back until Friday night. She just proved my point right there that no one ever tells me anything. And she wonders why I hate living here... it's not like anyone talks to me, at least when no ones around. It's so weird, if I have friends over or something she'll act like the perfect mother, and sure, she is, but I don't know, cooking and cleaning for me is something I could hire someone else to do... I can't hire someone to talk to me. Like today in the car, we drove Travis home (he walked up to the college with me) and she was being all nice to me in her office and when he was in the car... But as soon as he left I climbed into the front seat and sat down. I asked her how her day was and she said fine... So I started telling her about something that happened at school and she just said 'uh huh' and I got the feeling she wasn't listening so I said "and then we all turned into lizards and started doing the chicken dance" and she just said 'that's nice dear' ... So I stopped talking, looked at her and said "It's not that hard to actually listen mom" ... "I'm busy" .. "YOU'RE DRIVING" ... "Well I don't really want to talk to you right now" ..... I never said I wanted you to talk mom, I just want you to listen to me..... It's happening more often lately... I know I never have anything interesting to say, but I need people to listen to me rant and rave so I don't feel so alone. (That's probably why I have this thing). I just wish she'd pick one, the bad mother or the perfect one, she shouldn't be allowed to just all of a sudden act nice around people. I hate it. Mostly because since that's all other people see they get mad at me for complaining about my family life (*cough* April)... Oh I'm so sorry to hear about your parents splitting up, sorry that my dad dying when I was 7 and my mom only pretending to like me isn't considered a 'family problem'. Wait wait, I have more... of course I do. I haven't even gotten started on my aunt. Maybe I should leave her out of this ... but why? Why should I? I'm convinced now that she is the reason me and my mom have broke apart... I hate her too much for words sometimes. She's exactly the same around my friends too, nice, but weird (yay for kung foo kitchen) and then as soon as they're gone she seems to feel she has the right to yell at me. Lecture me. And sometimes even TRY and punish me. For those of you who don't know she moved into my house a year ago, she said for a week, maybe 2, it's been a fucking year. Her and my mom have of course gone through that whole sisterly bonding thing all over again. I wouldn't care, but it just feels like she's taken my place. I shouldn't have to fight for the effection of my own mother. My sister is off in Victoria and I'm left completely alone. Sure, I have friends and all that blah blah blah... I want a functioning family. If not at least one that I can stand to live with.


Thought of toasters... 02/20/2002, 5:40pm.


February 20, 2002

I hate school. Whenever they decide to give us Monday off they should just give us the whole week. Going back to school on a Tuesday is so much worse than a Monday. And today, today I just don't want to leave this house period. I want to sit here and bitch, then sleep (because I didn't do that last night), and of course watch stupid talk shows in my room... all curled up in bed... *siiiiiigh*

Ohhh! It works! Thank you SO MUCH Laurna! Everyone go visit her... NOW.


Thought of toasters... 02/20/2002, 5:59am.


February 18, 2002

Urk, last night was so weird. Pierce, Scott, and Paul dropped by as soon as I got out of the shower and rushed me off into the deepness of South Wellington to find Miko... Just as we arrive to her drive way she comes wandering out and tells us to run. The stupid girl threw herself out and her mom told her if she left she wasn't commming back so knowing Fumiko, she left and didn't go back until about 5 minutes ago. Anyways we ran and jumped into the forest as a car zoomed (heh, zooom) out of her drive way and down the road. The 5 of us stood around chatting, Paul soon became obsessed with finding drugs (yes, because there are so many places to buy when you live in the bush, litterally) so me and Miko walked off towards the highway and the three guys followed because for some reason they needed us (haha). We hung around the Tempo for awhile (we ARE cool) talking to Bronwen because she was on shift, but stupid Tom kicked us out so we made our way to my old elementary school. Yes, I told you, we're cool. =) We decided it was time to leave when Pierce broke one of the basement doors to the school. We wandered the streets for a few more hours but it was pretty much us just being idiots, oh well, we had fun. Then we all went back to my house and watched weird movies on Show Case.

Today me and Miko took the bus up to Woodgrove and went SHOPPING ... weee-hoooo! I got myself one of those seat belt belts, a Less Than Jake poster, a Misfits skull poster, 2 thongs (yes, let's tell random people on the net about my underwear!), molding paste, and orange hair dye. So tonight if I get off my lazy ass I'll dye my hair... go me...

Oh oh oh and if anyone knows why that first row on my page keeps going lower and lower PLEASE help me out.... it's driving me crazy! =P


Thought of toasters... 02/18/2002, 7:44pm.


February 17, 2002

Hi everyone! For those of you who don't know me (no miko, you know me) I'm Jesse and I'm a stupid little girl who doesn't know anything... =) Nothing left to say because introductions are laaaame...

Urgh... time to go shower... Apparently Pierce and Paul are on their way over... Yay I do have a life!


Thought of toasters... 02/17/2002, 6:27pm.


February 17, 2002

Urgh, new layout... I worked on this ALL of last night and I'm still no where near done. Wow, that's sad. I can't seem to get the columns right though, the first one is lower than the rest and it PISSES ME OFF. Rawr.

But I'm getting myself up on disturbedyouth.net today so yay for not having to deal with geocities anymore! Thank you so much Kande, I feel so stupid with this whole ftp thing (yes, I am a moron, how many times must I tell all of you?) but you've really helped a lot :) and yet again Jesse will be thanking Theresa because I would be no where if it wasn't for her... Thanks for all the help with the layout.... Alrighty, time to start getting the links working... yay




Thought of toasters... 02/17/2002, 1:00pm.


February 16, 2002

Guess what guys! I'm getting hosted! Yay for me! Yay for Kande! And yay for... socks! So everyone go here NOW or I will kill you :) *dances around for a few hours*

So how was YOUR valentines day? Mine was way better than last year (sorry about that one Mike...) but it was still one of those gloomy days. I proudly dressed in all black and then shriveled up in a corner and died. Well, cryed at least... Stupid day... it ruins everything.

Last night... weeee. Well, let's see. School sucked, it was actually okay for a friday. Last block we even got to miss class and watch a basketball game. Meaning me and Fumiko wandering around the school for an hour reading stuff about alcoholism. After school I went to Travis's with Brad and Pierce, Brad left around 2 cause he had an after school class. Pretty much as soon as he left me and Pierce got kicked out because Travis's dad blew up and now Trav is under house arrest. So me and Pierce wandered our way over to Scott's house. We hung around there for an hour or two .... mostly hanging out in the bathroom (you don't want to know why). Around 4 we had to go catch a bus to cedar, well, Pierce did, I could have stayed with Scott but Pierce told me we had to stick together *shrugs* We picked up Krista on the way to the bus station thing and then made our way to the boonies. I've decided I'm scared of public buses.... Anyhoo, we did some stuff, ate, and then watched Cats and Dogs with Spencer (his little brother) and Scott and Paul arrived in the middle of it. We played with Paul's paintball gun ... until one shot of inside the house and hit the wall ... heh ... Wow I cannot talk today.... Ummmm... Yeah, we went out and skated in Pierce's backyard for a bit, I spent most of the time on my ass because I cannot skateboard worth shit. ....Ummmm.... I left around 10:30 and watched cartoons for probably 5 hours... Yay for me

Today I was supposed to go out to Rutherford with April but she forgot these letter things that we need (we're doing an anti drinking and driving project) so we couldn't do it. Now I'm stuck here to play with my toes all day.


Thought of toasters... 02/16/2002, 1:43pm.


February 16, 2002

Look! Look! *New* layout! .... I've only got the links page working on it though, the rest are dead links.... aaaaand PIERCE IS THE COOLEST PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE!! (he bribed me...*cough*)


Thought of toasters... 02/16/2002, 1:43pm.


February 16, 2002

Guess what guys! I'm getting hosted! Yay for me! Yay for Kande! And yay for... socks! So everyone go here NOW or I will kill you :) *dances around for a few hours*

So how was YOUR valentines day? Mine was way better than last year (sorry about that one Mike...) but it was still one of those gloomy days. I proudly dressed in all black and then shriveled up in a corner and died. Well, cryed at least... Stupid day... it ruins everything.

Last night... weeee. Well, let's see. School sucked, it was actually okay for a friday. Last block we even got to miss class and watch a basketball game. Meaning me and Fumiko wandering around the school for an hour reading stuff about alcoholism. After school I went to Travis's with Brad and Pierce, Brad left around 2 cause he had an after school class. Pretty much as soon as he left me and Pierce got kicked out because Travis's dad blew up and now Trav is under house arrest. So me and Pierce wandered our way over to Scott's house. We hung around there for an hour or two .... mostly hanging out in the bathroom (you don't want to know why). Around 4 we had to go catch a bus to cedar, well, Pierce did, I could have stayed with Scott but Pierce told me we had to stick together *shrugs* We picked up Krista on the way to the bus station thing and then made our way to the boonies. I've decided I'm scared of public buses.... Anyhoo, we did some stuff, ate, and then watched Cats and Dogs with Spencer (his little brother) and Scott and Paul arrived in the middle of it. We played with Paul's paintball gun ... until one shot of inside the house and hit the wall ... heh ... Wow I cannot talk today.... Ummmm... Yeah, we went out and skated in Pierce's backyard for a bit, I spent most of the time on my ass because I cannot skateboard worth shit. ....Ummmm.... I left around 10:30 and watched cartoons for probably 5 hours... Yay for me

Today I was supposed to go out to Rutherford with April but she forgot these letter things that we need (we're doing an anti drinking and driving project) so we couldn't do it. Now I'm stuck here to play with my toes all day.


Thought of toasters... 02/16/2002, 1:43pm.


February 12, 2002

God dammit I H-A-T-E geocities... It's stopped letting me update almost completely.... Argh, and I'm so sick I can barely move... Well, could. As you can see I've made my way to the computer. I have this stupid CAPP project that was due today so I have to finish it so I can hand it in tomorrow and act like it was done the whole time. I'm so smart. *SNOOOOORT* fuck, go away you stupid cold. It's all the shirt's fault, the one day I finally wear it and I'm wandering the streets with 2 lost boys... I just realised no one is going to know what I'm talking about so I'll sum it up. I borrowed this sleevless weird backless type shirt from Ashley one night and I finally wore it again (under a nice big hoodie of course) and I ended up wandering around in the freezing cold for 2 hours.... And now I'm sick. Weeeee. Yesterday I swear Travis and Pierce were on some sort of stealing spree. Well, Electric Lettuce is now missing a $60 3 row studded belt... some poor little dollar store has no candy left and VV's boutique is missing two pairs of socks (yay for wrists). Urgh, I have a temperature of 40 C and I want to know if that's bad or not... what good is a thermometer when you don't even know what normal body temp. is? Anyways, I have one more page of this damn project to do plus pics and I don't even think my printer is working so I should get working on it =P

But fiiiiirst...... Jesse finally got her wakeboard! So go take a looky =)


Thought of toasters... 02/12/2002, 4:17pm.


February 7th, 2002

Urgh... updating is hard when geocities is a fucking piece of SHIT. Oh oh GUESS WHAT! I'm now an 'official' Peer Helper! Yay for me! I took the course, went through ALL the training, went away on the trip thingy, got pictures taken of me shoving a burger in my face (Yeah, weird, I found the pic in the photo album... ack), and now I've finally taken the interview, passed it, and I get my certificate sooooon! I'm so proud of myself, lol, I'm not too sure why, it's not that big of an accomplishment. Anyways, I had my interview at the beginning of last block... CAPP 9 ... weeeee... Apparently Travis and Pierce went to see me before they went to cooking but I wasn't there so they bribed Mr. Mack with muffins they were making to come back and visit me later. So, on my way back to class from the tech wing I passed the cooking classes and got Joey to find Travis for me... We talked for a bit and then he followed me back to class. Mr. Mack kicked him out and told him to come back when he had muffins. So of course about 4 minutes before the bell, we're all sitting quietly and Mack is lecturing us about something and all of a sudden we all heard "AHHHHHHHH!!" *slide* *boom* *crash* "FUCK! DOOR!" and of course rattling chains... Everyone turns and looks at me as always... lol It was hilarious, I think you had to be there to get what I'm trying to say though... Oh well. Mack didn't end up letting them in because he felt like harassing me about Rugby..... Yay first practice on Mooooonday! Hmmmmm... After school I was wandering around Thrifty's (foods, not clothes) with Niaomi (ack, can't spell, sowwy) and we were pulling out all this junk food for us to get (dammit, the nutella!!) .... I had a point here... OH! The glow worm! Yes! We found these awesome "Light Crawler" things... They're little plastic glow worm things that you press and red light comes out there noses... Hahaha man, we're so easily entertained... (The cheese was awesome) Anyways, they're so cool and I can't stop playing with mine... It's yellow and blue and yeah... I'm going to shut up :)


Thought of toasters... 02/07/2002, 4:56pm.


February 2nd, 2002

So, I'm begining to get VERY annoyed with Geocities. I haven't been able to access my damn account since the last time I updated. And to make things worse I can't get into my envy.nu account either... and that's where I have the new layout all set up and everything loaded and .... fuck, I hate computers.

Last night was the show... Well, a show. Me and Travis got there around 8 expecting it to have started, but when we got there everyone was standing around outside. Turns out the lady who was supposed to open the building for us never showed up... So me, the drummer from The Decents (yeah, I'm bad with names), and 2 short punky girls I see around sometimes but don't know (lol) all went down the road to the AA club and asked if we could use their building for the show... They said no because they were having a dance (wow, sober people dancing).... I decided I was cold and went and talked to Rob, Travis and some Wellington girls while they went and checked some other places. They came back about 10 minutes later and moved us all to the Fiesta Bowling Alley (yay for the big F). So guess where our show was....! lol I thought it was pretty awesome. A few people came in to actually go bowling, but most got scared and left... Handicap Parking left before we found a new place because they got too cold waiting around. Human Hagis played first, I remember seeing them at the Campbell River Show... (Mmmmm drummer... ;D). Short Fall was on second, they played a really good set, long... but good. The Decents played last, and of course they were awesome. I finally figured out who the lead singer looks like... Edward Scissor Hands! Yay for me...

I had exams on Tuesday and Wednsday, I think they killed me. Well, socials was EASY, I think I even passed the damn class. Science is a different story, it kicked me in the face.... Doesn't matter, I'm pretty sure there was no hope for me to pass anyways... Thursday we got the day off so I went to Pierce's with Kyle, Dustin and Travis. Friday we had the first day of the new semester. Yay for hating all my classes! Fuck, let's see... A block, grade 9 CAPP with Mr. Mack, he's already yelled at me... Hmmmm... B block, PE with Mrs. Webb, that's not so bad, actually it's great, I just hate more than half the people in the class. C block, English with Mr. Zandee, I had him last year, I want Mrs. Miller... lol I have a problem with pretty much every single person in the class (As you can see, my tolerance level has gone WAY down) ..... So I'm going to try and transfer out of that one. D block, Math with Mr. Harvey. Okay, so I just finshed Science with this guy, do you honestly think I want him again? The only good thing about that class is that Travis, Pierce, and Steve are in there... Otherwise I HATE math and I never want to step foot into that classroom again. All in all yesterday was a very shitty day and it makes me want to sit in my bed curled up in a blanket and to never face light or people again.....


Thought of toasters... 02/02/2002, 9:43pm.




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