VIRGINIA: (Calling from offstage) Look up girls!
CHORUS: What? That voice, it�s the one who brought us freedom, and look at the home of the Bushes. Look at the flames licking the sides! This must mean she freed herself, but I hope she gets out before the whole place burns down. What if she were to perish inside? (Various women swoon at the thought, the rest anxiously watch and discuss)
VIRGINIA: What foolish feminists you are (she chides them with a smile). Did you think I didn�t have the power to escape that man?
CHORUS LEADER: We were so worried when we saw the flames. What would become of us if we lost you?
VIRGINIA: You had no reason to worry. I got out--no problem.
CHORUS: But how?
VIRGINIA: (with a dismissive wave) He tried to tie me to an office chair, but he was so preoccupied that he only tied the chair. I sat calmly until he left the office and then I went over to a waste bin full of shredded papers, and dropped my cigarette inside. I was kinda sad to lose the cigarette, but (looking at the burning building) I think it was worth it.
W.: (Emerges from the building, looking wildly around. He�s slightly sooty.) Where is she? I�ve been tricked! She... (sees her) You! You�ve burned down my home! How did you get out here! What right do you have to do this?
VIRGINIA: (Takes a deep drag on her new cigarette and exhales while saying peace.) Peace, calm down or you�ll have an aneurism.
W.: How did you get outside?
VIRGINIA: Didn�t I tell you that you couldn�t keep me?
W.: (fuming) Lock the gates! Keep her in the city!
VIRGINIA: What�s the point? My ties go far beyond here.
W.: What a bitch!
VIRGINIA: I�d rather be that than ... (she spies a messenger running down from the mountain) Wait. We�d better listen to this kid, I�m sure he brings news of my women vacationing in the mountains. We�ll wait and listen, trust me, we won�t run off.
FIRST MESSENGER: I come from the mountains, where all the women sought refuge when they left their homes.
W.: Yes? What do you have to report?
FIRST MESSENGER: I�ve seen the women, free upon the mountainside, and I have incredible things to tell you. But first I must know sir, if I will be heard out, I�m afraid of a court martial if my words aren�t to your liking.
W.: Speak freely. You�ll be safe. It�s wrong to lash out at a law-abiding citizen. But every foul act you name will be added to this woman�s list of charges.
FIRST MESSENGER: Well, me and some of the other guys from town were up in the mountains and we saw these women everywhere. I knew some of them girls and they�re good girls. They were just lying around smoking and relaxing against trees and such. Some of them were playing guitars and dancing and just having a nice pleasant afternoon in the sunshine. They were all smoking the whole time, even the ones that I never thought would be doing that. We noticed that your mom Barbara was up there too sir. The women weren�t getting drunk or turning into lesbians like you said they would be sir. Well, me and the boys we backed away and started talking about all the funny things women do, and what we should do, seeing as how we wanted our women to come back home and make us some dinner. One man suggested that we should go and take Barbara back down to you sir, in service to the nation, and we all thought that was a pretty good idea. We hid over to the side and waited to ambush the ladies. They started up a big dance and Barbara came real close to me so I jumped out to grab her and she whirled around and shouted to the other women, �Follow me! We�re being attacked!� Some of the women formed ranks right there and chased us down, ridiculing us and hitting us and we couldn�t do nothing against them! Others just flipped out. They acted like they didn�t know themselves, or what was going on. The yelled at invisible people. They slapped at trees and the ground. I don�t know what they were seeing, but I�m sure glad they weren�t chasing me. The women ran down to the nearby town and chased everyone from their homes. They gave all the women cigarettes, and some of the girls too, and they started eating everyone�s food. Their appetites were amazing. The men of the town tried to defend their homes but the women beat them down, they knocked the rifles right to the ground and left the men bruised and bleeding. Women over men! It was unlike anything I�ve ever seen, and I never want to see it again. Those cigarettes, that�s where they got it from, those things are mighty powerful. But if I were you, I wouldn�t try to fight against them, because those women won�t give up easy, but also because I think them cigarettes are the only thing that will bring some peace to this world right now. Without them how will we smile a carefree grin?
CHORUS LEADER: I�m a bit afraid to speak to you sir, but I have to say something: nothing will stop Virginia.
W.: These women�s outrageous behavior is catching on like wildfire! We�ll be the laughingstock of the UN! You, go call up the National Guard, we will make war on these women. (First Messenger exits to do so) That�s what is so insulting, is that they are just women.
VIRGINIA: You never listen do you W? Even though you�ve treated me wrong, I will still warn you: it�s wrong to take up arms against your people, and against your businesses. Keep the peace here at least. The people of America will not stand by if you drive these women from the mountains by force.