Well, I�ve just finished watching Vampirella. If you haven�t seen this movie, consider yourself lucky.
Vampirella is another in the long line of New Horizon �classics�. Like The Coroner, it includes an ad for a porno at the beginning. Interestingly enough, it also includes a preview for itself. I think that really is a novel marketing strategy. It also shows that the guys that made this movie think that it�s bad enough that it needs to be promoted again after you�ve already rented it.
Vampirella tells the story of a princess of Draculon. Her stepfather is murdered by Vlad (incompetently played by Robert Daltrey). Of course, �Ella feels the need to avenge her stepfathers death. The storyline is basic, good guys win, bad guys lose. However, this movie throws in some twists that I would have never expected.
For instance, Vlad hides himself on Earth as a rock star. Specifically, a rock star called �Jaimie Blood�. Whose onstage attire includes a cape and a clip-on mullet. Yes, a clip-on mullet.
Overall, this movie is the worst thing I have ever seen. I�ve seen better acting in school plays. And I�m talking elementary school. They even have Vampi turn away from the camera to put her fangs on! This is a movie that only a rabid fanboy would like. And even then, it's at best a 50/50 chance. |
