Once Upon a Time... When I Was Alone:
Prologue
By: Kitty E.
Once upon a time, when I was alone, I just assumed it would
always be that way. For several years I cried silent, unseen tears
for the family I never knew, the friends I lost all too soon, the home
I never claimed until after it was destroyed, but mostly for myself. I
was ten years old, and on the streets, I deserved some pity, but the
only one who was willing to give any was myself. I was on a slippery
slope to insanity then, and even today I'm not entirely sure I avoided
the fall. I haven't killed myself yet, but I've killed so many
others. You tell me which is crazy.
How, might you ask, did I avoid the despair that could have
killed me? Simple. I became my own best friend. Everything I needed,
I found within myself. Hell, I even created my own goddamned
religion, the Cult of Shinigami, of which I am the pope. You know,
for a long time it worked. I talked to myself, laughed with and at
myself, wept with only myself as comfort. I was utterly self
sufficient but still lonely as hell.
That's why I groomed this charming personality of mine,
perfected my smile. People like a guy who doesn't have problems. They
want someone funny and lighthearted, someone who would rather help
them forget their troubles rather than bitch about his own. It didn't
work though, the real me was quietly pushed aside for the halfhearted
imitation that everyone wanted to see. Even when people started to
like me, want me, even take me in, I was still alone. By the way, my
name is Duo Maxwell, forgive my tendency to ramble, but believe me,
if you listen closely this'll have some meaning.
The story I tell you happened after the war had begun, the
war that I didn't even know had been dormant. I was always battling
in my heart, the world reflected the violence I knew, and the revenge
I desired. That's why I was so bloody happy to get to Earth. Earth
had to be different; it was beautiful, with abundant water, with a
real sun and beautiful moon watching over you like a god in the sky.
After all, how could there be the same old shit I found in space on
Earth, God's original Garden of Eden? I was wrong... there was a whole
lot of new shit, and one treasure.
Heero fucking Yuy. Sorry, the streets didn't give me much in
the way of elevated vocabulary. The expletive is the only way I can
think of to describe him. Heero is unique in this world, and yet a
product solely of it. Heero Yuy, a real one and only. He's guarded,
anti-social, and a borderline psychotic... and fucking beautiful. His
hair and eyes alone are enough to make me want him, if only for one
night. His body and voice could convince me of a three day retreat to
a cabin in the woods. But it's the riches inside that make me want to
keep him with me forever. God, that sounds *so* corny... sad thing is,
it's true.
I guess you could say I've found in Heero, the one thing I
can't find within myself... love. The only problem is... I'm still
alone. I can't reach him no matter what I do. I've tried to forget
him so many times, I nearly broke Quatre's heart when I tried used
him as distraction, and in the process I made an enemy out of Trowa.
Wufei doesn't want me, but then neither does Heero. I'm beginning to
think the only way I'll get his love is to steal it. It's not how I
wanted it, but I might have mentioned... I was, and still am, a
master thief.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Part One