PTI: Pardon The Interruption

The PWFFL was once again the topic of conversation on the popular ESPN show, "Pardon the Interruption." Tony Kornheiser and Michael Wilbon argued over whether there are too many .500 teams in the league so far.

(bell dings)

ESPN'S TONY KORNHEISER: --and that's why the playoffs are OVER for Boston! Okay, next topic!

ESPN'S MICHAEL WILBON: Okay, eight out of 12 teams in the PWFFL are 2-2 heading into week 5. The question is: Is there such a thing as too much parity? Tony!

TK: Wait, the WHAT??!! WHAT are we talking about??

MW: The PWFFL, don't you remember this from last year?? Just because you don't play fantasy football, you're spending all your time watching "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy"!!

TK: Hey, don't knock it till you try it! Okay, so this league has EIGHT teams that are 2-2?! Of COURSE there's too much parity!! What else do you call that?!

MW: I call it, COMPETITION. This is the best year the league has ever seen, the race to the playoffs is going to be TIGHT, I love it!

TK: There's not going to BE a race because all of the teams will have the same record!! They should just let Kalamazoo and Rhode Island play for the championship NOW, in Week 5, and put us all out of our misery!!

MW: What??!! You can't do that!!

TK: You CAN and you SHOULD, because right now the league is BORING!! Kalamazoo is the only exciting team, you could put the rest of the teams in a HAT, pick them out one at a time, and no one would CARE who you picked out first!

MW: Please, you weren't excited when West Palm Beach won its first two games, and then got shown the door?? Or the Green Bay Fudgepackers winning these close games??

TK: NO, all I care about is that Kalamazoo is still undefeated, Rhode Island is 3-1, and Wisconsin STILL hasn't won yet! That's all that matters! The rest of these teams might as well all be wearing the SAME UNIFORMS!

MW: You'd like that, wouldn't you? Why can't you just accept that there is FINALLY competition in fantasy football?!

TK: There's been competition!! Seattle and Kalamazoo battling it out every year isn't competition?! Now the SLUGS are a SLUGGISH 2-2, just like every other team in this STUPID league! ARGH, I can't take it anymore, somebody, somewhere, please start WINNING!!

(bell dings)

MW: Somebody WILL, and you'll be eating slugs for BREAKFAST when it happens!! Okay, moving on...