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- Back - Episode 156: " Fairytale of New York " - Season 8, Episode 12
We do not own the characters in this story, nor do we own any rights to the television show "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel the Series". They were created by Joss Whedon and belong to him, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Television, Kuzui Enterprises, 20th Century Fox Television, WB and UPN Television Networks. ~~~~~~~~~~ Prologue ~~~~~~~~~~ INT. SEWER TUNNEL VOICE: Buffy BUFFY swings round, getting into fighting stance. BUFFY: That voice. I heard it before. WILLOW: Voice? EXT. CENTRAL PARK, LADIES PAVILION, EARLY MORNING MAN: I’m Edge. BUFFY: Seriously? MAN: [cheeky grin] Asks the girl called Buffy. INT. CORRIDOR BUFFY: The spell … made slayer babies? WILLOW is staring at the closed door. Hope and anxiety chase across her face. When her silence continues, BUFFY waves a hand in front of her eyes. WILLOW: [wide eyes] I thought I killed them. I heard about babies dying – the location spells kept fritzing out. [she pauses, licking her dry bottom lip] But perhaps they didn’t? If this one survived? Perhaps … INT. SUBWAY CARRIAGE ETHAN: What can I do, mistress? DRU: [a devil-doll smile on her face] You can hang the pretty baubles. She pulls back the curtain with a violent wrench. Behind it is a circle of ten baby cots. Then she puts a finger to her lips. DRU: But shhh … don’t wake the children. INT. MAINTENANCE TUNNEL VOICE: Fashions in Manhattan are so fickle. That's what I love about them. BUFFY: And let me guess, you're the next big thing to hit the city? The biggest baddest most Gucci-worthy evil of them all, come to crush us like bugs? Because if we're talking so last season … VOICE: I never said I was the biggest. Or the baddest. [beat,dreamily] You can feel the city, can't you? Feel it waking up? [the VOICE gives a snort of disgust] And … damn, but I'm bored of this bland little nasal echoing American voice. INT. SUBWAY TUNNEL BUFFY: Something Dru said. [walking faster] Serious diversion by numbers, and there I was Slaying for Dummies , but it was – Spike. [pause] Dru went all vision face – saw Spike in the hellmouth when he – burning. Then she said she made a “dolly”. WILLOW: A bot? BUFFY: Something disgusting. And I don’t know if that’s real – she was probably trying to mess with me. The worst is – not just trying. She did. I keep thinking … [looking ahead] Back to work INT. SUBWAY TUNNEL WILLOW: You're connected with all of them. WILLOW links her arm behind KENNEDY's lower back. WILLOW: With all of us. KENNEDY remains silent for a step or so. KENNEDY: [quiet, pained] Am I?
In the silence stands EDGE – BUFFY’s early morning companion. He’s relaxed, eyes closed and smiling, his once-rumpled suit now a pristine white. He opens his eyes and looks at DRU. ETHAN gazes, a boy seeing superman. DRU’s hands are on her face, then running down her neck, and smoothing down her body. She inhales in perfect happiness. DRU: [joyful] DADDY! ---------------------------------------------- --Episode begins-- TEASER EXT. ALLEY, NIGHT ANNA, SARA and DAWN are walking down an alley, chatting and giggling. The camera moves around to show that they’re walking away from a cinema showing “28 Days Later”. SARA is looking apprehensive. Anna is scowling, as only francophone types can. ANNA: The part in the taxi, where they are in the tunnel…it’s stupid. Why do they go through it? DAWN: Ok, suspend disbelief for five seconds? It’s a horror movie, they have to go through the scary place. ANNA: I was not horrified. It was just … [shrugs] bah! SARA: Speaking of scary … Shouldn’t we take the subway rather than, you know, the dark alley? ANNA: Hah! What are you afraid of? We are slayers. Who would dare? SARA: We’re slayers, but Dawn’s not. DAWN: Oh, I’m good. [she rests her hands on their shoulders] Why would a big bad guy want to fight me when there’s slayer heads to add to the trophy room. SARA: If you think so… ANNA: [still deep in film-dissection] And…why is there a pile of zombies in the church? If they were zombies, they would not GO to church. It is silly! [snorts and kicks a can] DAWN: But, hello to the yummy cake-flavoured man! All big eyes and helpless and … the Irish accent. [Dawn’s eyes glaze like Xander beholding a doughnut] SARA: You liked him? I thought he was kinda … scrawny. And the hair, ew! ANNA: I prefer the…what was he called? The army man. DAWN: He’s like, 40 years old! Freak. ANNA: Pute! DAWN: Old man loving disgustophile. ANNA: Huh, that is not even a word. DAWN: So? Neither’s this [she gives Anna two fingers] DAWN and ANNA are giggling and play-wrestling. SARA tenses and her hand goes to her stake-pocket. ANNA and DAWN look up and see a woman standing watching them, just ahead. She’s dressed head to toe in black and is watching them with a sly grin. SARA: [whispers] vampire? DAWN: [shakes her head] Too this season … WOMAN: [pointing at DAWN] You! ANNA: [stepping in front of DAWN] You shall not have her! We are slayers! WOMAN: [rolling her eyes] Seriously, girls are doing ANYTHING to get noticed these days. [calling behind her] Sweetie, I think I’ve found the one we’re looking for. A man, dressed in similar sharp black – black t-shirt, tight-fitting pants, a black jacket - appears round the corner. It’s EDGE. He strolls closer. ANNA, SARA and DAWN tense instinctively into fight-mode. DAWN is keeping it cool, but her breathing is faster. EDGE looks DAWN up and down as the WOMAN folds her arms. EDGE: Oh yes. Exactly what we’re looking for. [to DAWN] What’s your name darling? DAWN doesn’t answer. She’s sizing him up. ANNA glowers. SARA looks to DAWN for guidance. DAWN: Wait … EDGE: [thoughtfully] Quirky but shy, I can work with that. [looking at her intently, then smiling] Have you ever considered modelling? DAWN: [wide eyed] Huh? ANNA: [slapping Dawn on the back] Excellent! DAWN: [still thrown] Sorry? EDGE: Never apologise for your beauty chuck. See, I’m scouting for a show right now. Not usually in dark alleys, but we’re doing a shoot just round the corner. Come and have a look. The girls exchange excited glances. DAWN: [playing it cool] Ok. They follow EDGE and the WOMAN round the corner. As they round the corner, we see the next alley has been transformed into a model shoot, complete with big lights, reflective foil and a model standing against the gritty urban backdrop, wearing an African-style headdress/mask and an elaborate animal print costume. EDGE turns to DAWN, with a “ta –daaa!” gesture. DAWN’s still keeping her distance, but looking more excited by the moment. EDGE: Urban jungle, see? Naff as you like, but it sells the frocks. [he picks up a camera and talks to the model] Show me the jungle, baby! SARA: [muttering] That’s so not politically correct. The model strikes a theatrical pose, arms up, masked face tilted and catlike. EDGE: That’s it. [to Dawn] What do you think? DAWN: I don’t know … EDGE shrugs. EDGE: You don’t have to decide on the spot. But why don’t you come and have a taste of the high life? Fashion week party, tomorrow night. Bring some friends, if you know anyone who could really do with a good night out. He reaches inside his sleek black jacket and pulls out some gilt-edged
tickets He turns back to snapping the model, who continues to strike poses. WOMAN: [businesslike] We hope to see you tomorrow [she gestures her head in a polite but firm “scram” motion] DAWN, ANNA and SARA scram. When they get around the corner, they erupt into excited “squees”. The camera moves back around the corner of the alley to EDGE. He takes a few more snaps, then inspects his model. EDGE: A’right love, I think that’s a wrap. The model takes off her mask and her hair comes tumbling down. It’s DRU. EDGE walks up to her and she pulls him close enough to kiss but doesn’t. DRU: Who’s the fairest of them all? EDGE: You [he touches her nose] are such a fisher. DRU: No. [shaking her head and twirls away from him, posing] I’m a super model. CUT TO BLACK WOLF HOWL, BUFFY’S THEME PLAYS Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy Anne Summers Special Guest Stars: With: ACT I EXT. NYC STREET, NIGHT DAWN, SARA and ANNA are walking. ANNA: So, you are going to take us to this party? SARA: I think I’d feel kind of out of place at something that…cool. ANNA: I wouldn’t. DAWN is looking awkward. DAWN: Listen, guys, I was thinking … SARA interrupts, with a little smile. SARA: It’s ok…you’re going to take Buffy, aren’t you? [rolls her eyes] Geez, you guys are like the mafia. DAWN: Just call me Dawnie Soprano. ANNA: [pissed] Huh! [then, hopefully] There’s still one ticket. The three girls come to a stop, they’ve reached the Scooby apartment block. DAWN: It’s just … Anna, you could have fun in a paper bag, but the older generation? They need to be taught. SARA: Go on then, fairy godmother, wave your magic wand. DAWN smiles and hugs them both goodnight, then hurries up the steps. ANNA: [calling after her] But when I marry Orlando Bloom, you are NOT invited to the wedding! INT. SCOOBY CENTRAL, NIGHT WILLOW, XANDER and BUFFY are standing looking at something. Their expressions are distressed. BUFFY: [sighing] Oh boy. XANDER: Boy? It’s man-sized. WILLOW: Gotta say Giles, even my brain’s boggling. We pan around to see GILES standing with his back to the door behind three tables groaning with old books, new books, newspapers and sheafs of notes. GILES’s eyes are gleaming with the nearness of so much knowledge-filled paper. KENNEDY is sitting in an armchair already looking through a book, with an expression of thought on her face. GILES: You said you wanted to widen the sphere of our research. BUFFY: Yes, but I didn’t mean gather together two of every book in the world and start an ark! The door opens and CLAUDIA comes in carrying more books. XANDER: And lo, the books did breed and cover all of the earth. WILLOW wanders over to the table and starts inspecting the contents. CLAUDIA: [to GILES] Do you want me to fetch some more? There’s a few others from the Stern collection that might be relevant … [pushing some wobbling books back onto the table] I noticed a some volumes on rituals involving, er, infants. GILES: [off BUFFY’s glower] I think this will do for now. BUFFY: If “now” is defined by “for the rest of our waking lives”. WILLOW picks up a book and her eyes light up. WILLOW: Ooh! New biography of Drusilla! GILES: See, I said this would be fun. BUFFY sits at the table and the others follow suit. WILLOW starts flicking through the pages of her Drusilla book, sitting next to KENNEDY. BUFFY stares hopelessly at the books for a moment, then gets her business face on. BUFFY: So, what do we know? WILLOW: Drusilla was an extra in The Bicycle Thief in nineteen forty … [closing book] … sorry. XANDER: Starting with the basics, Drusilla’s got some powerful new mojo going on … WILLOW: … that’s like no mojo we’ve come across before. XANDER: And we’ve got a whole crèche full of babies next door that Dru used last week to … and it’s the to-what where I’m drawing a blank. WILLOW: I’m generally feeling short on why’s and hows. XANDER: But we’re doing pretty well for unsolved mysteries. GILES: Like Ethan’s role. BUFFY: Oh, and, what about those pterodactyls, huh? CLAUDIA: And that box that Buffy smashed … [slightly embarrassed] the box of Red Dawn. BUFFY: [thoughtful] And my sewer voice. XANDER: This was so much easier when we had a Hellmouth to blame stuff on. GILES: Well, I see nothing for it but to roll up our sleeves and [he gestures to the table] Get stuck in. XANDER: [scared] Tonight? WILLOW: Or we could have a research party, tomorrow night? It’s Shabbat, so technically we’d be doing something naughty. Or I would. BUFFY: Or I could patrol … or … clean the stove? KENNEDY: [slightly uncomfortable]. Sorry, no can do, already got plans [closes book and places on the floor next to her]. GILES: I hate to play the dour patriarch card … CLAUDIA: If hate means love. GILES: [glares at CLAUDIA] But this is serious, Buffy. We still don’t know what we’re dealing with. BUFFY: I know. That’s the thing. It’s just, we’ve been researching flat out for the past week, and all we have is more confusion and tension headaches. We hear the key turn in the door and it opens. BUFFY: Maybe if we took a break … the night off? I hear it refreshes the brain. In theory. It’s not something I’ve tested in a while, but I think … DAWN enters, looking bouncy. DAWN: Did someone mention playing hookey … [she pulls tickets out of her pocket] Because I’ve got three shiny tickets for tomorrow night to the fashion week equivalent of the Chocolate Factory. You know, probably with no actual chocolate, because, models … BUFFY: [taking the tickets and looking] Ooh! CLAUDIA: Those little buggers are like hen’s teeth! How did you … DAWN: I was model spotted. XANDER: Go Dawn! BUFFY pouts ever so slightly BUFFY: Oh, that’s … DAWN: Don’t worry ugly sister, you shall go to the ball. BUFFY: Hmph! GILES: Now, wait a minute … XANDER: Relax Giles. These books aren’t going anywhere. I think the Buffster deserves a night of fun. DAWN: And hunky models. CLAUDIA: [dreamily] They do have impressive restorative properties. GILES takes off his glasses, helpless in the headlamps of the party train. GILES: Well, I suppose a night off couldn’t hurt. You’re only young once. XANDER coughs. GILES: Enchanted candy aberrations notwithstanding. BUFFY is now looking slightly scared. BUFFY: Guys, I’m just tired. I’ll be good to carry on a researching tomorrow. DAWN: [to WILLOW] I’ve got one more ticket, if you want it … WILLOW: [quickly] Oh no. I’m much more about the meaty books than the hunky models. XANDER: Think I know a girl who could do with a big night out. CLAUDIA looks at him, hopefully, but when DAWN offers him the remaining ticket, he heads to the door. CLAUDIA: [stoical] Oh. Yes. INT. FAITH and CLAUDIA’s APPT. FAITH is doing sit-ups on the middle of the living room floor, dressed in a vest and pyjama pants. There’s a knock at the door and she pauses, half-way through a sit-up, then gets up nimbly and pads to the door. It’s XANDER. XANDER: Let me guess, I caught you somewhere between sit-up 400 and 401. FAITH shrugs and nods for him to come in. XANDER: You’re getting to be a creature of habit these days. FAITH: Clears my head. FAITH sits down on the sofa and XANDER follows her. XANDER: And you know what else clears the head? A Friday night out on the tiles, no expense spared … the perfect evening for a … FAITH: [blinking] Are you asking me out on a date? XANDER: Oh. No. Not me. I think of you like a sister. Well, I sister that I … the date’s with Buffy. FAITH: Okaaay. XANDER: … and Dawn. FAITH: I think maybe you’re confusing my perfect night out with yours. XANDER: Aha! Passing over the insinuation with a breezy smile … it won’t just be Buffy and Dawn. INT. SCOOBY CENTRAL – BASEMENT Pan down the wooden staircase of the basement, showing the dark, cold but organised view below. There are metal cabinets along one wall, boxes and a weapons store at the far end. A light streams down the stairs as someone opens the door and footsteps can be heard descending. Pan up on KENNEDY's half lit face as she walks over to the metal cabinets. Looking at the cabinet in front of her KENNEDY takes a deep breath and pulls it out of the way to reveal a safe behind. Her cell phone rings, KENNEDY fumbles to get to it before the sound it heard. KENNEDY: [uncomfortable] Yes, it's here. [beat] I understand [beat]. Yes, I have them. KENNEDY flips the cell phone closed, takes out a piece of paper with three groups of numbers on it. KENNEDY: [beginning to punch in the numbers] 007 girl - so not my thing KENNEDY pulls the door to the safe open, revealing the contents within, there are a few books, some papers, and shining noticeably in the half light, the Slayer Scythe. KENNEDY: [face twisting, reaching in for it] Sorry, Will, [beat] really sorry ... INT. WESTIN HOTEL BATHROOM, NIGHT DRUSILLA is luxuriating in a bubble bath – a free-standing affair with twirly feet, in the middle of an enormous white-tiled bathroom. Her long hair is down, dangling in the water, and she’s holding a rubber duck. DRUSILLA: [to the duck] It’s going to be a marvellous party. Boys and girls and moonlight and music and… She squeezes the duck and it squeaks. DRUSILLA: [scolding the duck] No, it won’t be a massacre! Daddy was very clear about that. There’s a knock on the door of the bathroom. We hear ETHAN’s voice. ETHAN: Um … Drusilla … sorry to interrupt, but …. DRUSILLA: [calling in a dreamy voice] I’m just washing my hair and all my sorrows down the plughole. There’s a hole in the earth you know. I want to climb down it, but it’s a long long way and none of my business. ETHAN: Er … I’ll say you’ll be along in a minute then? DRUSILLA: [to the duck] I have to go soon. I have a meeting. [she lets out an excited sound and holds the duck up to her cheek, whispering to it] You see, I’m a very important person now. INT. LUXURIOUS PENTHOUSE SUITE, WESTIN HOTEL, NIGHT MUSIC plays – Nina Simone singing “I’m feeling good”- from a state of the art music system . This room has all the trappings – massive white desk, complete with every kind of stationary and a pile of invitations. There’s a white drinks fridge, obviously designer. A few touches around the room indicate a feminine presence – the sort of female that likes old fashioned frills and ornaments. One of the armchairs has antimacazzars on the arms, and a big-eyed Bratz doll sitting in the chair. There’s another room – a dressing room – with its door ajar. EDGE is lying back, hands behind his white-haired head, on kingsize bed, all silk and crisp sheets. He’s wearing an exquisitely tailored white linen suit, two-tone brogues, a black shirt underneath but no tie. His eyes are closed and he’s smiling with cat-who- got-the-oscar pleasure and his feet jig to the beat. We hear splashing from the en-suite bathroom. ETHAN is standing by the bathroom door, looking awkward. EDGE opens an eye and looks up at him, propping himself up on his elbows. EDGE: Come on Rayneo, take a seat, you’re making me nervous. [he lies back, hands behind his head, sighing.] ETHAN takes a seat beside the oak desk, leaning on it in a posture of studied relaxation, but you can bet if you felt his butt muscles, there’d be clenching. He’s watching EDGE, not sure what to expect. EDGE: [waving his finger in time to the music] You know, this the best I’ve felt in millennia. ETHAN: I’m glad … Lord. EDGE: [laughing] Lord! Of what? The rings? The manor? ETHAN: Of chaos. EDGE: [he sits up suddenly] ‘Spose I am. But, less with the Lord. It makes me feel like I’m really British, and not just borrowing the accent for a laugh, like. There’s a knock on the door just as the music comes to a stop. EDGE is up with a leap. He uncricks his neck and strolls to the door, hands in his very expensive pockets. Despite the suaveness of the suit, there’s something very not slick about him. A frantic energy, a gawky, jerky twinge to his movements and the way he holds himself, like he could lose control of his limbs at any moment. He opens the door with a quick burst of energy. A teenaged uniformed BELL-HOP is standing there with a trolley and covered dishes. EDGE gestures him in, stepping back, his big black eyes following the boy. The BELL-HOP pushes the trolley in, with the practised invisibility of a very good waiter. He makes to go, but EDGE stops him. EDGE: Wait a minute mate. Just have to ask if the missus is hungry. BELL-HOP: Sure, sir. EDGE walks to the door of the bathroom and knocks on the door, calling above the sound of the shower that’s now running. EDGE: Dru, petal, you hungry? The door opens, and DRU’s head emerges, wet hair dripping around her bare shoulders. She looks hungrily at the bell hop. DRU: Oh yes! DRU disappears back into the bathroom. EDGE smiles and nods to ETHAN. EDGE: Make yourself useful then, while Dru makes herself decent. ETHAN: [getting up, uncertain] Sorry …? EDGE: You know [he flicks his eyes to the bell-hop]. ETHAN gets it. The bell-hop is caught completely unawares by ETHAN grabbing his hands and shoving him up against the wall, hand over his mouth. A muffled scream comes from between ETHAN’s fingers. ETHAN shoves him to the ground, giving him a kick in to the bargain. He glances to EDGE who’s watching with curiosity, but no sense of getting off on the violence. DRU emerges slowly, in vamp face, from the bathroom, wrapped in a silky belted dressing gown. Her hair is wrapped in a white towel. She comes and stands over the struggling bell-hop. She’s calm, but her eyes are excited. DRU: He’s perfect. She kneels and shoos ETHAN away, then pulls the boy to his feet. He starts to scream again as he sees her face but she sweeps him into her arms and bites down and the cry becomes a silent exhalation of pain. EDGE watches, birdlike and impartial, with a vague smile. ETHAN breathes fast from the struggle, wiping his mouth where the boy’s elbow clocked him in the face. There’s a little blood there. EDGE comes closer to DRU and peers down at her as she feeds. She looks up, still in vamp face, blood round her lips and narrows her eyes at him with a hiss. EDGE: Enjoying your room service? DRU smiles, her face de-vamping and she stands, leaving the body where it lies. DRU: He was very young. I was his first kiss. She takes ETHAN by the hand and pulls him to her bosom. Then she cranes her head back, looking at him. She reaches forward and licks the blood from his bust lip. DRU: I see romance in the air. EDGE retires to the armchair, picking up the Bratz doll and holding it on his lap. DRU pulls away from ETHAN. He stands, awkward once more. EDGE: In’t this cosy. DRU: We’re a family. Like the Waltons. EDGE: [grumpy] I think you watched too much telly with that ex of yours. DRU sweeps over to sit on EDGE’s lap, leaving ETHAN standing. DRU:[Sadly] I lost my babies. EDGE: That’s why I got you this. [he walks the doll along the arm of the chair] Thought you’d like something modern. DRU: It smells of factories and slaves. [beat, snatching the doll] I love it. EDGE looks up at ETHAN. He smiles, open and friendly. EDGE: So, here we are. Sit down, you great lump. ETHAN moves slowly to the chair, glancing at the body. ETHAN: Should we move him? EDGE: [serious] You should never move the body. Don’t you know first aid? ETHAN laughs, but stifles it. EDGE: Oh, don’t stand on ceremony. You’ve got a lovely laugh. Real sinister. EDGE jigs his knees and DRU chirrups and leans back into him. ETHAN sits facing, waiting for instruction. EDGE: I’m not much of a leader. Takes too much organisation. Lists and all that fuss. But, I am the one with the bigger picture dancing in front of my eyes. [he kisses DRU’s back] And that’s what we’ll do tomorrow night. Little bit of a dance. DRU: And the slayer, she’ll dance too. EDGE: [putting his chin on DRU’s shoulder] You sure she’ll come? The sister won’t bring her superfriends? They’re just so boring I want to kill myself. [excited] You think Buffy’ll really come? ETHAN: [reluctant to butt in, but trying it anyway] The Summers sisters are something of a buy one get one free deal from what I can tell. DRU: She’ll come. I see them dancing. [she turns to look at EDGE, her eyes wide] Can I have a pretty dress? EDGE: Of course you can, 8-ball. [he puts his hands on her head and starts massaging her scalp] So, they’ll come, they’ll dance…and we’ll see what they’re made of. She if she’s got the stuff. INT. SCOOBY CENTRAL, MORNING The books have been cleared away to one side of the room and BUFFY and DAWN are having breakfast on one of the tables. DAWN is making omelette and BUFFY is drinking orange juice. BUFFY: Are you sure you want me to come? DAWN: [flipping the omelette] Yes! BUFFY: I won’t be, you know, cramping your youthful style. DAWN: You’re 24. Not exactly over the hills and far away. Besides, Faith will be there to up my street cred. BUFFY: Why don’t you take Mick? DAWN: Because I dumped him two days ago? BUFFY chokes on her juice. BUFFY: What…just like that? And you didn’t say? Or, you know, cry? DAWN: Just like that. It wasn’t exactly headline news. He was cute but … [shrugs] there just wasn’t much there, with us. BUFFY: But … what about the pain, and the trauma? And the death? DAWN makes an exasperated gesture with her spatula. DAWN: This is my role model? [beat] Maybe you’ll meet someone at the party? BUFFY: And maybe he’ll be evil. Or have a timeshare on his body with a hell god. Or… DAWN: What about Mario, last summer? He wasn’t evil. BUFFY: No, but he was Mario-ed with two Marionettes to support. Which I found out on, like, the sixth date, and only then because his wife called me and shouted. I think I learned some new Italian words. DAWN: So, bad, but not evil. That’s a start, right? You’re coming. BUFFY: Okay! Okay! [beat] Maybe you should take Claudia? DAWN: Buffy … you’re coming tonight. That’s an order. What are you afraid of? BUFFY purses her lips, then smiles. BUFFY: Nothing. A night of fun I wanted, and I’m going to have it. [to herself, cupping her orange juice in both hands. She shakes her head.] She just broke up with him. Just like that! Pouf! Over! INT. SLAYER SCHOOL CORRIDOR, MORNING ANNA and DAWN and SARA are walking, carrying school books. DAWN: I’m starting to feel like I’m the mom. And, I know, our family sitch is complex … speaking as the girl who had a robo-sister-mom one summer … but I could do without the role reversal. SARA: It sounds like she just needs a boyfriend. DAWN: No, she just needs to quit being so gothic about the whole love thing. Sure, she’s had bad luck. But luck can change. Tomorrow is another day. [beat] And I hate that she forces me into the Pollyana place. ANNA: You were born to that place. I think you have the soul of a cheerleader. DAWN: I’m not going to rise to that, on the basis that cheerleaders don’t have souls. SARA: [worried] Is that something I should’ve learned in Mr Giles’s
class? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10-02-2005, 02:34 PM #3 Join Date: Jun 2004 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- INT. WILLOW’S OFFICE, DAY WILLOW is standing over a potion table, with vials and pots bubbling away like a science experiment. She’s holding a crystal with tongs, her face in deep concentration. A line of cribs are along one wall. The SLAYER BABIES. BUFFY enters. WILLOW: [not looking around] Hey. BUFFY: Am I cursed? WILLOW: Woah, magicking here, you don’t want to be saying the c-word. [wrinkles her nose] Not THE c-word c-word … [WILLOW puts down the crystal and the tongues.] Cursed how? BUFFY: Man-cursed. Doomed to Y-chromosome badness. I just had a lecture from love doctor Dawn about finding the love fun, which made me feel it’s my sacred duty to get over myself … but there’s something about sacred duty that just doesn’t lead to fun. WILLOW: My advice? BUFFY: Uh huh? WILLOW: Go to the ball, get really really drunk and cry in a corner all night. BUFFY: That’s … no! You think that’s what I’m going to do? Those magic fumes have clearly addled your brain and made you forget the fun monster that is Buffy. I’ll be dancing the night away. And when I run out of night, I’ll dance the morning away too. Because I can. WILLOW: That’s my Buffy. See what I did with the reverse psychology? BUFFY: You’re a cunning witch. WLLOW grins, then picks up her tongs again. BUFFY: Speaking of witch … how’re the spells going? Any closer to cracking the Da-baby code? WILLOW: Just putting the finishing touches … BUFFY nods and goes quiet. WILLOW starts to murmur, passing the crystal over the bubbling fluids. Then she slides the crystal into one of the vials. The vial starts to glow, then a little light rises out of it. Suddenly, the light splits into ten rays, which shoot out towards the babies. WILLOW’s eyes shut for a moment and she gasps. The rays of light fade and the vial stops glowing. WILLOW opens her eyes and looks at BUFFY. WILLOW: Buffy…whatever else that spell did, the babies are completely normal. BUFFY: Oh. That’s … good, right? WILLOW: I guess. [she looks at BUFFY, biting her lip] But they’re not slayers any more. BUFFY tenses up and takes a step towards the babies, then looks at WILLOW. BUFFY: What? Drusilla reversed the slayer spell? Does that mean she could… WILLOW: [shaking her head] I don’t think whatever she did would work on girl-sized slayers. It’s just, with the babies, bodies that small shouldn’t contain that much power. So squeezing that much power into something that small…it’s unstable. Somehow she found out how to play on that, and extract the power. Hey presto, normal babies again. BUFFY: But you said, not the standard issue magicks? Dru’s not turned into a witch has she? Cause, I could really get into burning her at the stake. WILLOW: We’re still in regular staking territory, this isn’t witchy power. The traces the spell left behind feel…like something that’s going to take some serious outside the boxing, research wise. Which I shall be all over with Giles and Xander tonight while you go off and shake that slayer booty. BUFFY: It will be shook. I’m sorry I can’t be more help on the research front, but, magic that’s out of Willow brain range is way beyond me. [walks over to the babies and WILLOW follows] BUFFY: We should get in touch with their parents, now we know they’re ok. They look at the babies in silence for a moment. WILLOW: I wonder if they’ll remember any of it? BUFFY: Doubt it. Though if any of them grow up with a pathological fear of cockney women, there will be no surprise party in Buffy town. BUFFY leans closer over one of the cribs, and the baby gazes back up at her. BUFFY: It’s strange, thinking each one of them was a slayer a week ago…and now, they’re going to grow up, just normal. With no nights in cold cemeteries, no blood and guts, no apocalypses … you know, unless they live in Cleveland. Or LA. Or … isn’t there an Iceland hellmouth now? WILLOW: We’re still looking into that. It’s either a Hellmouth or Andrew’s right and it’s alien meteor rocks. But “Andrew’s right” is rarely the preferred theory in most circles. BUFFY fixes the babies with a long gaze, then shrugs slightly. BUFFY: Just normal girls. Huh. The bell goes outside. BUFFY: I’ll make the calls. WILLOW: And I’m class-bound, looking forward to dealing with people who don’t spit up on you. BUFFY: They did? [inspecting Willow’s clothes] It doesn’t show. WILLOW: Noticed that I’ve been changing my clothes at least twice a day the past week? BUFFY: But you always do that. WILLOW: Well, not today, Kennedy's all sick, I don't wanna disturb. So, no fashion parade for me today. [excited] Figured out what you're gonna wear tonight ? BUFFY: [raising eyebrows] Oh god, don't remind me! Probably won't matter anyway, all my outfits tend to end up Carrie-esque! WILLOW grabs up her piles of books. WILLOW: Well, blood red's in this season I've heard. You'll be a hit! BUFFY takes one last look at the babies and they head for the door. EXT – DUSTY ROAD – LATE AFTERNOON A silver saloon car pull up at a military barrier point, complete with soldier in cabin. It stops and the window winds down. KENNEDY passes out papers. KENNEDY: Miss da Suza … authorisation code 5647 cobra. SOLDIER: [looking at the papers for a moment] Thank you Miss da Suza. Welcome to Initiative Cell 5, have a pleasant stay [he disappears inside the cabin]. KENNEDY: [to self] Okay, from 007 to Area 51 [beat], interesting. The barrier rises and KENNEDY drives through. INT. HOTEL, EVENING It’s starting to get dark. ETHAN and EDGE are standing by the window looking out at the city. EDGE is wearing a beautiful white suit and ETHAN is dressed We hear DRU singing from another room off the penthouse. ETHAN: Here it is, just what you asked for. Took a bit of getting I can tell you, but you know me, I’m always resourceful. ETHAN passes EDGE a small box. EDGE: Yes, that you are kiddo. EDGE puts his arm around ETHAN, who tenses. EDGE: You know, you’ve never once asked why I picked you, out of all my worshippers. ETHAN: No, always thought that it was due to my good looks, cunning and slavish devotion to mystical chaos [grins – no response from EDGE – hesitates]. Why did you? EDGE: Well, there’s all the obvious stuff. [he counts off on his fingers] You’ve got the inside scoop on our Sunnydale pals … well, acquaintances really, but I’m sure we’ll become very good friends in time. [he smiles] Very good friends. And, you’re a dab hand at manipulating little girls into perverting their power, which I respect. Got me where I am today. But you know what the clincher was? ETHAN waits for the clincher. EDGE, giving him a squeeze. EDGE: You’re English. ETHAN looks shocked. EDGE: [EDGE looks out the window, eyes bright with enthusiasm] You people bottle everything up, til you’re ready to explode. ETHAN: Here, that’s not entirely fair! EDGE: Oh, come on. [he turns to ETHAN, fixing him with a gaze] That’s why you’re one of mine. You’re longing for a way to let it all out. All those years, holding it together, when all you want to do is scream…dance…and tear the world to shreds. ETHAN’s breathing harder. He bites his lip. EDGE: You’re a ridiculous man. [ETHAN scowls, but EDGE smiles] Shh… that doesn’t matter. The world’s ridiculous. [he brushes ETHAN’s hair back, gently] And our job is to help everyone realise that. You with me? ETHAN: [grinning] Absolutely. EDGE: Good lad. ETHAN: So this is what you needed, how powerful is it exactly? [ETHAN glances at the box still in EDGE'S hand]. EDGE opens the box to reveal a necklace. His face is full of expectation. EDGE: Powerful? Not at all. It’s just a trinket for Dru’s lovely neck. ETHAN: Oh. EDGE: Don’t be glum. It’ll make the lady smile, and that’s what tonight is all about. It’s something for the ladies. DRU: [O.S] Ladies like me? EDGE turns. DRU is standing behind them, her hair cut shorter. She’s wearing an off-the-shoulder long red dress. EDGE whistles. EDGE: Give us a twirl, luv. DRU twirls, holding out her arms, then hugging herself and giggling. Then she shimmies up to EDGE and holds her face close to his. DRU: A kiss for princess? EDGE leans towards her, hands behind his back, but doesn’t kiss her. DRU opens her eyes as EDGE holds out the open box. She takes out the necklace with a happy squeal. She puts it on. EDGE: And now … [he takes both DRU and ETHAN by the hand, in a courtly gesture] We’ve got a party to go to. INT. SCOOBY CENTRAL DAWN and BUFFY are all dressed up, both in little black dresses, waiting near the door. BUFFY looks ever so slightly awkward. XANDER, CLAUDIA, WILLOW and GILES are sitting at a table, with assorted books. WILLOW has her trusty laptop out. XANDER: May I say, the Summers girls scrub up nicely. Scrubbed is a very good Summers look. GILES: Yes, you both look lovely. WILLOW: You’re gonna knock em dead. BUFFY: Oh, I’m hoping for a zero death count. DAWN: And, this isn’t YOUR party, so, perhaps we’ll get lucky? The door opens and FAITH comes in, wearing a halterneck dress, longer than her usual style. CLAUDIA smiles. CLAUDIA: Oh, wow, it looks better on you than it does on me. FAITH: [casually] Yup. CLAUDIA: That’s not very sisterly. FAITH: Sisterhood was never my strong suit. [beat] Are we good to go? DAWN nods and picks up her purse. DAWN: Yuh huh. BUFFY: [to Willow] Call me if you find anything important? WILLOW: No calls for you. Night OFF! So, scram! Vamoose … and other get the hell out words. BUFFY: But … WILLOW: [points sternly at the door] … before I make you disapparate! BUFFY: Going! DAWN, FAITH and BUFFY leave. The door shuts behind them. GILES: Disapparate? I’m not familiar with that particular spell. XANDER: There is more in Harry Potter than is heard of in your philosophy, Dumbledore. GILES: Good Lord, am I the only person here who actually reads books intended for the over tens? XANDER: That’s why we sit at the feet of your wisdom. WILLOW: But, hey, Xander was Shakespearing while he was Pottering. XANDER: I was? I’m smarter than I look and feel. INT – MILITARY INSTALLATION – EVENING KENNEDY is standing in white corridor, with a long bag over her shoulder. Another soldier is leading the way. They come to a white panelled door and the soldier swipes a card over a hidden keypad. The door opens. SOLDIER: If you would just wait here Miss da Suza. KENNEDY enters the room, it's barren save a table and chairs at the end. She makes her way in and dumps the bag on the table. The door closes. KENNEDY: Right, wait. KENNEDY starts to pace the room. CUT TO a monitor, SAM and RILEY are looking directly at KENNEDY from a different room. SAM: Well, she's brought it. RILEY: Seems so. We should go in there, talk her through it. SAM turns to him, placing her back to the monitor and leans on the console. SAM: Remember the procedure Riley, let me do the talking. Okay? RILEY looks put out. RILEY: Procedure is fresh in my mind Sam. But, I know these girls, I know how they think, it's not all ab … SAM cuts him off. SAM: Granted. But, this one's mine Riley. Orders are there. Let me handle it. CUT BACK to KENNEDY who is still circling the room. KENNEDY: [to self] hidden doors, invisible keypads. 007 to Area 51 and now verging on Tomb Raider. So I’m guessing … KENNEDY feels along the wall, using one hand, eyes closed, slayer senses alert. Her hand stops. KENNEDY: [half smiles] Yeah. Just there Lara. KENNEDY pulls her hand back, makes a fist and punches full force at the wall. The panel shatters, wires and electric sparks can be seen. KENNEDY pulls at the wires and steps back, waiting. A door opens in front of her. KENNEDY: [full smiling] Open sesame. KENNEDY walks through. CUT TO COMMERCIAL ACT TWO EXT. WESTIN HOTEL, NIGHT BUFFY, DAWN and FAITH are getting out of a taxi in Times Square. Ahead is a crazy-looking hotel, all wonky angles and bright colours. BUFFY straightens her dress. BUFFY: Ok. I’m ready to party. DAWN: Say that when we’re inside and I’ll disown you. The three girls head across Times Square to the party. INT. ATRIUM OF THE WESTIN HOTEL, NIGHT A high-fashion party is in full swing in a modern room. Along one of
the high walls are a series of balconies overlooking the party. The crowd
is a mix of gorgeous young things, plastic surgery-friendly chic women,
handsome men and balding but well groomed millionaires. Everyone is wearing
the kind of crazy OTT couture that you look good in spite of rather than
because of. Where is my master the rebel prince We pan up to one of the balconies, near the ceiling. EDGE is standing leaning on the railing, looking down at the crowd and smiling. The WOMAN from the teaser comes up to him, carrying two glasses of champagne. He straightens up and takes one with a smile. They clink glasses and the WOMAN smiles. Beneath her mask of cool, there’s a nervousness to her. EDGE: Very kind of you to get us invited to this little soiree, Chloe. Organising everything. You know it’s not me strong point. CHLOE: That’s why I worship you, sire. You’re not bound to the restrictions of… EDGE: [exasperated] Will you leave off the sire. You’ll only encourage Ethan. Name’s Edge. [stares in her face, wild-eyed and barks at her] EDGE! CHLOE jumps and EDGE smiles. CHLOE: Are the others…here soon? EDGE: They’ll be along in a bit. I wasn’t letting Ethan out the house in what he was wearing so Dru’s dressing him up nice. I mean, just because you worship chaos, doesn’t mean you should look a mess, does it? CHLOE: No Si…Edge. EDGE: Well, it certainly is a fabulous party. The energy is just so…[he gives a little shiver of pleasure] insane. CHLOE: Oh yes. Everyone who’s everyone’s here. The camera pans down among the guests, weaving through the chattering crowd. We come across ILONA COSTA BIANCHI, CEO of WOLFRAM I HART, wearing a gown that shows off her considerable assets. She’s talking to a man with dark hair and his back to camera. She touches his arm as they talk. ILONA: Yes, the new project is very exciting. [she spreads out her arms] When people look in this mirror, they see themselves fat fat fat! [she gives a charming smile] Unless they wear clothes by my client. We get the prototype from Sunnydale. MAN: [Italian accent] You are so full of ideas. [he brushes her face with a tanned hand] And so beautiful. ILONA: [waving a hand modestly] Ma dai, you have such a golden tongue, Immy. MAN: The ladies are so kind as to say so. ILONA: So, tell me…did you and this slayer, did you ever…? MAN: [firmly] Never. She did not have your…[he looks down] talent. ILONA: I hear she turned you down. For being such a naughty boy. MAN: Perhaps you can ask her. Because, there she is. The camera pans further through the crowd and we see BUFFY, FAITH and DAWN arriving. ILONA: [V.O] Oh, we do not interest ourselves with slayers. Filthy people. We will speak of them no more. But I wonder, who did invite her and her little friends? BUFFY, FAITH and DAWN are taking off their coats - a couple of waiters take them – and looking around the party. They wander past a buffet table. DAWN: Ooh, pumpkin pie. I wonder if anyone is going to eat any of it? FAITH glances around herself at the model guests. FAITH: Looking at them, I’m guessing they’ve been on a strict cocaine and speedball diet. BUFFY: Shh! No drugs talk. You might give Dawn ideas. DAWN: And ideas are a big bad. Just Say No to ideas. [she takes a big slice of chocolate cake from the table and starts to munch.] The only drug I’m interested in is some hardcore class A sugar. You should try some. BUFFY: Evil pusher. DAWN: And, it’s a slippery slope. One day chocolate cake, the next, living in a sordid crack dungeon. FAITH: Oh ho! Face of an angel, mouth of a sailor. BUFFY: [groaning] I blame the parents. And the teachers. Both of which are me. DAWN: [grinning] Oh, you’re not really a teacher. [BUFFY glares at this] FAITH snags a couple of glasses of champagne from a passing waiter and passes one to BUFFY. BUFFY: Thanks FAITH is looking over to where ILONA and THE IMMORTAL are standing. FAITH: Who’s the mega-hottie looking your way, B? BUFFY follows her gaze and her eyes widen in surprise. BUFFY: Oh. Just a guy that I…never. FAITH shades her eyes as if looking out to sea. DAWN, who’s standing behind her – she’s got ants in her pants and she’s been looking all around at the glamour – looks over her shoulder. FAITH: For ones that got a way, that’s a big’un. DAWN: It’s the Immortal. Buffy Just Said No. I’m going to see if Orlando Bloom’s here so I can marry him and taunt Anna. DAWN saunters off, snagging a glass of champagne. BUFFY:[calling] No champagne! [she gives up] FAITH is still looking at the IMMMORTAL, who’s standing with his back to us, is now talking to another woman. FAITH: I thought you were over the tightly-wound period. You turned down [appreciatively] …that? [she shakes her head] BUFFY looks embarrassed. BUFFY: Kind of. FAITH: What do you mean? BUFFY: Well, see, I did turn him down. [hanging her head] After. FAITH: [laughs] And the ice begins to thaw on mount Summers. BUFFY: [giving her a dirty look] But Dawn never finds out. On pain of…lots of pain. FAITH: I’d like to see you try something. I’m not the little 18-year old you stabbed that time. BUFFY is thrown by this and FAITH looks awkward. FAITH: How come you didn’t tell Dawn about your fun with the Italian stallion? Don’t sisters share this kind of crap? Braid each others’ hair, talk about relationships? That’s what I always guessed it would be like. BUFFY: See, I’m always telling her about my “no more bad boys” philosophy, and I feel, this little….well, big long…[blushes] The Immortal, and, with me, would kinda…make my philosophy look all incoherent. FAITH: [batting her on the arm] Hey, B, your hypocrisy’s safe with me. BUFFY: [scowling] Someone’s using long words tonight. FAITH: [now irritated] Fine. [holds up her empty glass] I’m gonna get another. FAITH moves away from BUFFY, who looks glumly at her full champagne glass. BUFFY: When did I become a social retard? INT. ATRIUM, WESTIN HOTEL DAWN shimmies back over to BUFFY, who’s sipping her drink and looking around, lost. DAWN has ANDREW and PATRICK in tow. They’re wearing tailored mod-style suits. Scruffy but cool – think Pete Doherty without the track marks. You might suspect that PATRICK dressed ANDREW. This is not Mr Well’s usual look. DAWN: Look who I found! BUFFY: [surprise] Andrew? And…? PATRICK: [extending a hand] Patrick. [looking her up and down] Your dress, it’s very…nice. BUFFY senses that wasn’t exactly a compliment. DAWN gives PATRICK an affectionate poke. BUFFY wrinkles her nose. DAWN: [to Patrick] So, you were playing earlier tonight? I’m so bummed I missed it. PATRICK: Yup, you should be. I was brilliant. ANDREW: He was. [making an Italian-style gesture and giving PATRICK a rather manly slap on the back] Molto bene! DAWN: You have to get him off the Italian. PATRICK: Yeah, and the butch. I think they go hand in hand. [he ruffles ANDREW’s hair] Next he’ll be growing chest hair. ANDREW: Eww! BUFFY: [to DAWN, indicating PATRICK] You know each other? PATRICK: Old friends. Well, young cool sexy friends. ANDREW turns to BUFFY. There’s a note of accusation in his voice. ANDREW: Buffy, what are you doing here? BUFFY: I’m sorry? ANDREW: There isn’t any slaying to do is there? BUFFY: No slaying. ANDREW: I mean, can't I have any private life without work butting in? BUFFY: Private life? This is the biggest party I've ever been to! ANDREW: You REALLY wasted your time in Italy FAITH walks up with a bottle of champagne in each hand. She holds them up. FAITH: Thought I’d cut out the middle man. [seeing the boys] Hey Pat, Andy. Looking…[she looks them up and down] geeky. ANDREW: It’s geek chic! PATRICK: I’m chic, he’s geek. BUFFY: [whispering to FAITH] You know him too? Why does everybody know him? There should’ve been a memo. FAITH shrugs, pouring champagne for everyone except DAWN. BUFFY sips hers, quietly. A HOT GUY joins them, saying “hey” to ANDREW and DAWN. BUFFY finds herself standing beside him as the others mill around, chatting and watching the band. BUFFY puts on her best flirty face and smiles. BUFFY: Hi. HOT GUY: Hey there. [smiles] I’m Daniel. BUFFY: Buffy. HOT GUY: So, what do you do Buffy? BUFFY: I’m a teacher. DANIEL’s face becomes a mask of cold indifference. DANIEL: Oh. [he glances over her shoulder] I have to go say hi to Carrie. Bye! He walks off. BUFFY: [to his departing back] Who’s Carrie? [beat] I hate Carrie. She looks around to see the others have left her alone with DANIEL, but now that DANIEL’s gone, she’s just alone. BUFFY exhales slowly, then starts to walk across the room. We hear the babble of voices, the clink of glasses, almost drowning out the band. BUFFY drifts to the buffet table and fills her glass absent-mindedly from the ice sculpture, which is in the shape of a rearing horse, with the drink coming out of its mouth when you press your glass against it. She takes a sip, then chokes. It’s hard liquor. She puts down the glass and looks out at the crowd. CUT TO: Point of view of a camera, circling BUFFY, watching her from a distance. CUT back to BUFFY. Her friends are now dancing near the band. She makes a motion to join them, then sags. She catches sight of a sign on the wall that says “To the roof garden”. BUFFY: Air is good. Air and aloneness. CUT TO: ROOF GARDEN BUFFY emerges at the top of the stairs. We hear a snatch of music from downstairs, then she shuts the door and we cut to silence. BUFFY’s in a beautiful roof garden looking out over the city. The railing is trailed round with flowers. A fountain has been added to the garden for the occasion, and pots full of flowering plants have been added to the existing flora. BUFFY leans on the rail and looks out at New York. The tinkling sound of the fountain mingles with the strains of music coming up the stairs. She sighs – peace at last. Then she tenses, sensing a presence behind her. BUFFY: [not turning round] If you’re a vampire, this is my night off. And if you’re not, this could be an awkward conversation. She turns, and the camera pans up from the ground. We see black boots up to black leather coat … to the cheekbones and eyes and peroxide hair of – SPIKE. SPIKE: Right first time, luv. [smiles] Vampire. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10-02-2005, 03:21 PM #4 Join Date: Jun 2004 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ACT III EXT. ROOF GARDEN, NIGHT BUFFY is staring at SPIKE. They’re standing just a few feet apart. BUFFY doesn’t move – her lips are parted, eyes wide. Tension and shock fix her whole body to the spot for a long moment. SPIKE is looking at her, a smile around the corners of his lips but his eyes are serious. SPIKE: Always did manage to find you when you were alone. BUFFY: How? How did you … ? SPIKE tilts his head towards the door. SPIKE: Easy really, followed you up the stairs. He chuckles – half cocky, half nervous. Suddenly, BUFFY gives him a ringing slap across the face. SPIKE: Hey, what was that … [hand to his face, then takes it away] for? BUFFY looks at her hand, reeling from the solid impact, then up at SPIKE. Her lip quivers, she takes a step towards him and reaches up again. SPIKE recoils for an instant then stays still as she puts a hand to his cheek. After a moment, Spike covers her hand, keeping it there for a beat, then letting go. BUFFY lowers her arm, slowly, staring at him. SPIKE shakes his head and looks up at the night sky, not able to hold her gaze. SPIKE: Buffy – BUFFY: You’re real. SPIKE reaches into his pocket, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. SPIKE: Yeah. I am. SPIKE puts a cigarette into his mouth and lights it. He takes a long drag and exhales before going on. SPIKE: As you can tell from the delicate touch-test, not the First or a ghost. Not of late. He puts his cigarette to his lips again. His hand is shaking ever so slightly as he lowers it. SPIKE: Want one? BUFFY gives a brisk shake of her head. SPIKE: Course not. BUFFY: How … are you back? SPIKE: It’s quite a story actually. Maybe I should save it for the long winter evenings. BUFFY: It is winter. February. And evening. How? SPIKE: It was the amulet. [he shrugs] Well, and a Fed-Ex parcel. BUFFY: [quietly] Oh. SPIKE: See, seems it was a two-way ticket to hell. The amulet. Not the parcel. No bloody idea what that was. BUFFY: You were in … ? SPIKE: Who knows exactly. But it felt like the sort of place I deserve. Did you think I’d go to Disneyland? BUFFY: [stepping forward] You saved the world. That deserves a little bit of Disney magic. SPIKE: Yeah, and I ate people. He smiles at her again, uncertainly SPIKE: Seems that whoever upstairs has kind of a long memory for things like that. And I don’t think it’d go down so well with Mickey and Minnie either. BUFFY: This is so strange. [she shakes her head, as if to get a reality check]You’re here. Alive here. And then … here here. SPIKE: Giving me a cheer, luv? BUFFY: Just trying to get it to sink in. [she looks at him] But its ... it won't sink. BUFFY half-raises her hand to reach and touch him, but lets it drop again. SPIKE notices but doesn’t comment. The space between them feels awkward. SPIKE takes another long drag on his cigarette, then drops it to the ground and stands on it, focusing his attention there for a moment. Then he raises his eyes to BUFFY’s face. SPIKE: I’d forgotten – what looking at you feels like. INT. SCOOBY CENTRAL, NIGHT XANDER looks up from the book he’s reading. WILLOW, GILES, HUGO and CLAUDIA are sitting around the table, also booked up. XANDER: I wonder if Buffy’s having fun? CLAUDIA: I hope she’s not having as much as I had last night. GILES: [not looking up from his big volumey text] We’re all aware of your hangover, Claudia, you don’t need to feel compelled to share it with the group. [sees something in his book] Oh! WILLOW: Eureka oh, or bugger, oh? GILES: An element of both, I’m afraid. HUGO: He giveth with one hand, and with the other he taketh away. Good old Giles. CLAUDIA: Yes, good OLD Giles. GILES: Do shut up. XANDER: What didja find? A solution to all our problems in one handy paragraph? How come I never get the book that has that? GILES: It’s not exactly a solution. But a passage on Janus made me wonder something. XANDER: Isn’t that who Ethan worships? With the non-Batman two face action? GILES: Yes and no. WILLOW: And there’s a Janus-y answer for you. GILES: Quite. The thing with Ethan is, he doesn’t exactly worship anyone in particular. His devotion is to chaos, in all its forms. Janus is one manifestation, but I’m wondering … whether Ethan’s found a new object of his mystical affections. HUGO: You think we’re facing a god? XANDER: Same old same old. GILES: Not necessarily … [he frowns] possibly. CLAUDIA: You should get inspired more often, Giles. It’s very helpful. GILES: Perhaps I didn’t make it clear that my "shut up" was binding for the evening. [he takes off his glasses and rubs his eyes] I’m sorry. I’m not being very clear. I’m just thinking out loud. WILLOW: Well, our problem number one is that Dru’s baby spell didn’t feel spell-y. But if we’re talking chaos magicks … it wouldn’t feel like the kind of magic I’m used to. I’m all about the nature. But, not in an Aleister Crowley bad sex and drugs free love type nature. I’m … all in the past with that. XANDER: You had free nature love? WILLOW: [smiles affectionately] So not rooting among the [rolls eyes] lurid back issues. Let us to the present place and meet me in topic alley – XANDER: Swop you some of the informative literature I kept under the bed … WILLOW: Topic alley – topic-alley – topically? XANDER: … and now stalking my snappy dialogue – so, we’re saying Dru and Ethan have an ooky plus one? GILES: Neither of them have great power individually, nor any particular reason to work together. But what they do have in common is a fondness for chaos. And I wonder, if their goal so far has been to raise some greater power. HUGO: Someone with a fondness for pterodactyls? WILLOW: Perhaps Buffy’s voice? I mean, the voice talking to Buffy … in the sewers. Perhaps that’s our man? Or god. Or … other thing? GILES: [looking thoughtful] Hmm…yes. It’s all plausible. XANDER: But why did they use slayer power for the juice? Do you think they’ve cooked up a scary bugged-out uber-slayer. [beat] Because if they are, there’s some serious copyright breach. That was our idea. WILLOW: Maybe the slayer power isn’t the important thing. They used power from … people who shouldn’t have slayer power. Babies. GILES: [thoughtful] Yes…The forcing of such immense power into such small vessels. WILLOW: It was unstable. In chaos magick, that’s a big plus. With the uncertainty principles and Schrodinger’s catterie. XANDER: Huh? WILLOW: Chaos breaks rules. We broke rules. Ergo … we paved the way for chaos to have its wicked way. XANDER: This isn’t going to be one of those "it’s all our fault" conversations is it? Am I tired of those. HUGO: We could always blame the government. That’s a classic. WILLOW: How about we skip to what are we going to do about it? HUGO: I could write a very stern letter to my MP. GILES: [glaring at HUGO] We could start asking local sources if they’ve become aware of a new player in town. A couple of … mutual friends I shared with Ethan in London might be useful. XANDER: Or we could just wait for Mr Chaos to come to us and say "hi". If I’ve learned anything, it’s that big bad types aren’t usually shy and retiring. And if it is Drain Man … .he seems kinda interested in Buffy. WILLOW: Why does that not give me a happy feeling? INT. – INITIATIVE CELL 5 – NIGHT KENNEDY walks through the now open door into a smaller room, full of monitors showing what appears to be different rooms in the installation. She walks towards them slowly. She notices one in particular, a girl, her age, in a room, pacing. KENNEDY reaches forward to turn up the sound. The GIRL is appears to be locked in. We hear her voice over the monitor. GIRL: [crying] I'm sorry okay, I'm sorry. I'll do better next time. Just, don't lock me up again. MAN (V.O. through an unseen speaker): Miss Applebee, there appears to have been a misunderstanding on your part. You're here to serve your country, better is just not good enough. The GIRL sinks to the floor, from this angle KENNEDY can now see that she's badly bleeding. A large cut on her leg and another on her head. KENNEDY: What the …? DEMON: Yes, disturbing isn't it. KENNEDY turns round quickly, getting into battle stance. She clocks the demon behind her. DEMON: The way they she doesn't seem to understand her purpose here. Things would be so much easier for her if she would just take orders. KENNEDY: and again I say, What the …? ALARMS START TO SOUND DEMON: That's how we work. Orders are given, then they are followed. KENNEDY: Is that a fact? KENNEDY round kicks the demon, stunning it. She then grabs it by the throat and pushes it violently up against the wall. KENNEDY: Follow this. Tell me what I’m seeing or lose the parts that make you, you. Four or five soldiers pour through the door. KENNEDY does not flinch. SAM and RILEY enter close behind. RILEY looks stunned. SAM: Kennedy, I know how this must look. But, if you'll just let go of Mr. Thonas I'll explain. There's nothing to be alarmed about. KENNEDY: Alarmed? Who's alarmed? I mean, locking things up and experiments always been your thing, back in the day. But, I'd been kinda thinking that you'd turned over a new leaf. Riley? Care to enlighten me a little? RILEY: [looking directly at Sam] Second in command here. [sadly] Just as surprised as you. SAM: Kennedy, it's not what it looks like, let go of the demon. We'll talk. KENNEDY: Ya know what? I think I'll keep hold of Mr Thonas here, and you talk. RILEY: [looking at the floor] Do as she says, Sam. SAM: [sighs] It's a training camp. We're training fighters, that's all. The methods may look a little harsh, but … KENNEDY: Harsh? [laughs] More like totally off the scale psychotic. And since when did you decide to start working with demons? RILEY looks directly at SAM again. KENNEDY: I take it that she’s one of us. The girl. How many have you got? SAM: It's the reasons behind it that you must understand Kennedy. This is too important to let some notion that a quick pep-talk and some cookies are going to make an army. KENNEDY: Oh I get it. This is the part where you tell me that the fight against evil can’t be fought without casualties. You and Giles should really hook up some time.[squeezing the neck of the demon in her grasp] But it seems you already got a special friend. MR THONAS: [strangled voice]: Now, just a minute, our relationship’s purely pro … [Kennedy squeezes again] KENNEDY: I haven't finished. [looks at Sam]. So, what do you need the scythe for? [beat] You know what? I have no idea why I'm asking. KENNEDY lets go of the demon. She heads towards the door back to the table. SAM holds her hand up to the soldiers, motioning them to let her past. KENNEDY: [picking up the bag, pulling out the Scythe] If you haven't noticed I may be pretty new at this game. But, I've still picked up enough to know when I've been spun a line. SAM: The program is just as I said. Designed to get the best out of the assets that we have. To provide an effective, well-trained army. KENNEDY: And the Scythe? Just needed for research purposes right? To make sure that the magic is holding? RILEY: Is that what this is, Sam? KENNEDY: [looking directly at Riley] That’s right, ask your wife. You trust her, right? RILEY: I [beat]…[he looks away] SAM: Kennedy, just think for a minute…What if the magic is unstable? That spell was off the charts… KENNEDY: [swings the scythe in her grasp] Feels pretty stable to me. SAM backs off a little. KENNEDY: [looking at Sam] Thing that’s getting in the way of any explanation you might give me. I just don't [Kennedy shrugs], trust you. RILEY looks at SAM again. KENNEDY: I'm leaving, and I'm taking this with me. When I get back, I want a call to tell me that this program has been stopped and the girls released. If I don't get a call, I shall tell our mutual allies exactly what's been going on. Understand? SAM: Kennedy, this is a government-run installation, the orders come from the top. KENNEDY walks towards SAM with the Scythe still in hand. She looks directly at SAM. KENNEDY: Have you ever fought a slayer? I mean, I know you've done your time in the demon camps of outer Mongolia, but, ever actually fought a slayer? SAM stands her ground. KENNEDY: I think you should get in touch with "the top" Sam. Remember who got your lot out of the mess in Sunnydale? I may not be "in charge", but I'm pretty sure I could arrange for an away trip for a few of the girls. KENNEDY swings the Scythe in her hand. KENNEDY: This feels powerful, ya know? Like it, sorta belongs to me. SAM looks increasingly uncomfortable. SAM: I'll see what I can do. KENNEDY: Good. KENNEDY steps away from SAM, she turns, picks up the bag, looks back at RILEY and SAM, and heads for the door. KENNEDY walks quickly down the white corridor. Bag over her shoulder. She reaches the door, flanked by a soldier, who blocks her path. KENNEDY: Okay Private Ryan, let me through. RILEY: Kennedy, wait. KENNEDY turns. She looks at Riley directly, her stance softens a little. KENNEDY: Riley, you won't change my mind. RILEY: That's not what I'm here for. Just hear me out. KENNEDY just looks at him, arms folded. RILEY: Could you [beat], could you hold off telling Buffy for a couple of days? Give me time to work this through? KENNEDY'S face crumples in thought. KENNEDY: You didn't know did you? I mean, how they were treating them? RILEY: [looks uncomfortable] No, I didn't. KENNEDY: Gotta sting a bit, knowing that Sam kept if from you. RILEY: Not the best surprise [beat]. Does Willow know you're here? KENNEDY'S face flashes over with conflicting emotions. KENNEDY: Of course [beat]. Okay, two days, you've got two days and then you call. RILEY: Understood. KENNEDY brushes past the soldier in here way, leaving RILEY staring after her. INT. ATRIUM, NIGHT DAWN and FAITH are sitting at a table at the party, sipping drinks and people-watching. DAWN: Where did Buffy poof to? FAITH: Dunno. Maybe she hit it off with that Daniel guy? DAWN: So, are you on the prowl tonight? [a worried look passes over her face] I’m sorry … is it too soon? Do you want me to not talk about … FAITH: It’s cool. I’m just happy to hang out. DAWN: I feel a little guilt about being off the research wagon for tonight. But only a little. FAITH: You’ve got to kick back sometimes. Otherwise you go nuts. DAWN surveys the crowd, scrutinising passing males. DAWN: I do have a mission tonight. I’m training my gaydar. Patrick’s been showing me how to hone my powers. He was saying, in a civilian situation, a guy with good hair AND shoes is usually a gimme. But, fashion party … so everyone has good both. Then again, fashion party so … [she sighs] you know, sometimes I feel Ancient Sumerian conjuration is simpler than figuring out guys. FAITH: ’Fraid that’s a feeling I’m never gonna share.[she nods to the dance floor, putting her feet up on a chair] You should go bag yourself a hottie. Don’t let me hold you back. DAWN: It’s no fun on your own. [pleading] I need a partner in crime. She gets up and holds out a hand to FAITH to pull her up. FAITH gives in and gets up. FAITH: Crime I can do. They weave their way through the crowd. We see ANDREW and PATRICK talking in a corner and the camera stops on them. ANDREW is cradling a glass of champagne. ANDREW: I think I’m tipsy. PATRICK: [leaning closer] Perhaps I should take you home? ANDREW: Then we’d miss the party! PATRICK strokes his face. PATRICK: I’ve not done well corrupting you yet, have I? ANDREW: I’ve worked the evil look, but it’s over. I mean, all the cool people are good now. PATRICK: [frowning] Like Spike? ANDREW: [sighs deeply] It was just a ... a graffiti. [corrects himself, Italian accent] Graffito. I told you, we never went out and anyway he’s…gone. PATRICK looks distrustful. PATRICK: For that was in another country, and besides the wench is dead? ANDREW: Your hair looks nice. PATRICK: You are cold and calculating. I think you’re still evil. ANDREW: You just want me to be so you can say you have a cool badass evil boyfriend. I’m just, like, a status symbol to you. The camera moves away from their bickering, to the entrance of the party, into the stairwell and up the stairs. DRU and ETHAN are descending the staircase. She’s wearing her foxy red dress and ETHAN is all in black, looking very understated. They’re arm in arm, which ETHAN doesn’t look all that comfortable with. DRU is stressing. DRU: Did you lock the room? There might be thieves and robbers. ETHAN: All locked up. DRU seems satisfied with this. She glances approvingly at his outfit. DRU: That’s much better. Black is the new black. [she giggles] I should have brought my black dolly. But I think I punished him too hard last time. ETHAN: Where is it? He? DRU: I put him back in his box. Don’t play with all your toys at once is what my mum said. Tonight … the slayer’s the toy. Not just a slayer. [sad] She’ll always be the one. ETHAN: I’m looking forward to the … toying. That particular girl’s caused me more than my fair share of discomfort. Military prison isn’t a picnic. Especially when you have to share your cell with a Fyaral demon. I suppose that was their rudimentary idea of poetic justice. DRU: Then aren’t you grateful I got you out? ETHAN: Eternally. [uncomfortably, touching his neck] Well…not literally. DRU smiles. They get to the bottom of the stairs and DRU moves away from ETHAN, peeking in through the door into the party. She beckons to ETHAN. He stands behind her, looking at the party, and checking out a passing girl. DRU: So many people. I’d like to eat them one by one. But Daddy says that’s not the game tonight. INT. ATRIUM, BALCONY EDGE is standing on the balcony. He turns to see DRU and ETHAN coming up the stairs. EDGE: Ah, there you are. You look smashing. DRU: Did you start the party without me? EDGE: Dru…of course not. I can’t start without you. ETHAN: [looking down at the crowds] Is the slayer here? EDGE: Somewhere. And she brought a mystery brunette. There [He points down at FAITH and grins] I always like a bit of a random factor to spice things up. DRU gasps. EDGE looks at her curiously. EDGE: What’s wrong? DRU holds her head and squirms, whining. DRU: Someone’s here – not invited. Shouldn’t be here. EDGE puts an arm around her shoulder and she pulls away from him. He pulls her closer, spinning her round and holding her by the shoulders, looking into her eyes. She hisses at him and he smiles. EDGE: Shhh. It doesn’t matter. I’ve got something to distract you from your busy head, princess. DRU looks up, wide eyed. DRU: Streamers? And fireworks? He leans in closer and whispers to her.. EDGE: We’re going to give them a present. A story to lose themselves in. DRU giggles. DRU: Poor lost lambs. ETHAN looks away, feeling he’s intruding EDGE: [to ETHAN] Look and learn, our kid. He suddenly grabs DRUSILLA close. She squeals happily. His face is close to hers and he smiles, slowly, his chest rising and falling with the fast breath of excitement. EDGE: Give me a little madness, sweetheart. He kisses her forcefully, pulling her head closer with his hands. She writhes against him. ETHAN gulps slightly. As EDGE kisses DRU, his eyes snap open. They’re glowing red. Snaking wisps of red mist gather around them. ETHAN is now watching with wonder and excitement. ETHAN: Yess! EDGE and DRU pull apart. His mouth is closed, his eyes glowing red. DRU licks her lips and her eyes snap open. She looks around her, very alert, then folds her arms around herself, as if she’s cold. EDGE doesn’t look at her. The red of his eyes is lighting his face with an eerie glow. DRU: I feel…clear. [frowns] It’s so quiet, so ... EDGE exhales, breathing out a little red mist. EDGE: [his voice is slightly cracked] It’s time to start the fairytale. Then he covers his mouth with his hand, steps to the edge of the balcony, and blows out the red mist over the crowd. He watches it happily. EDGE: That should get the party started. The red mist-motes start to sparkle as they fall through the air, turning pink. We follow one wisp as it floats down and weaves precariously amongst the dancers, narrowly missing jerking heads and moving shoulders. CLOSE on DAWN dancing with abandon, smiling at FAITH. FAITH is more reserved in her movements. As the dust hits them, the lighting changes subtly. Softer but brighter and squeaky clean – a hint of Disney. The music changes too. From RUFUS WAINWRIGHT song to orchestral music with a waltz rhythm. DAWN coughs slightly as the dust hits, followed a moment later by FAITH. The crowd parts and, with the rising sound of a large string section, DAWN looks up to see a beautiful young man gazing at her, very Prince William lookalike with a suggestion, possibly, of Hugo. FAITH looks from one to the other, her face choked with envy. CUT TO: Dust motes floating over the rest of the crowd. As it hits a MAN with a walkie-talkie – a bouncer – he morphs, growing larger, becoming … an OGRE. We move through the crowd. We see dust hit the horse ice sculpture. It starts to move and stands up … .A WHITE UNICORN. As the dust hits the rest of the buffet, the pumpkin pie becomes … yup … A COACH WITH WHITE HORSES. The party guests start to dance in a formal, old-style waltz, couples forming, looking adoringly at one another. We see ANDREW and PATRICK. As the dust hits them, ANDREW starts to wander through the crowd, blinking and confused, losing PATRICK in the increasingly strange crowd. ILLONA stands watching everything with interest, the broad dinner-jacketed shoulder of the IMMORTAL beside her (his face remains off-camera). IMMORTAL: What is this? ILLONA: Hm! [she looks around] New player. Perhaps … he would be interested in freelance, no? IMMORTAL: You are not affected, carissima? ILLONA: No, no … I have had all my shots. Anti mysticals. It is company policy. [inspects him] You are not affected either? IMMORTAL: [His hand appears, stroking her face with a practised caress] Who needs fairytales – each night I spend with a woman is a fairytale. Dance, carissima? She smiles and takes the hand. They join the waltzing crowd. CUT TO: BALCONY ETHAN is leaning over looking down at the crowd. We notice a pack of wolves is now prowling the edges of the dance hall. Some of them spot ANDREW and form a growling circle around them. Even over the waltz music, we hear his girlish shriek as he spots them in turn. ETHAN: Impressive. [to EDGE] You two are quite the team. EDGE: [slow drug-like smile] She’s my poison. She shows me visions of what the world can be. DRU is not in the zone with them. She’s scanning the crowd keenly. DRU: The slayer … where is she? EDGE: [still glassy-eyed and feverish] It’ll find her … this is her story. EXT. ROOF GARDEN BUFFY is leaning on the railings, looking out over the city without really seeing it, wearing the end-of-Chosen smile. SPIKE is looking at BUFFY with an intense but undemanding gaze. BUFFY: [quietly] We stopped the bus – and – looked back and … I was so proud of you, Spike. BUFFY turns from the rail to face SPIKE. She smiles and SPIKE gazes at her, uncharacteristically motionless, the eyes keeping their singleminded intensity. BUFFY: … and I felt free – for the first time since … [shakes head] But hurting … until now. SPIKE: Buffy – where I’ve been, we need to talk … BUFFY: You’re here. You’re here now, let’s leave it at that. For now. SPIKE: I – [He’s interrupted by a loud shriek from below. It may or may not be ANDREW] BUFFY’s face takes on a businesslike expression. SPIKE rolls his eyes. SPIKE: Home sweet home. They rush to the door. As they open it, a cloud of pink sparkly mist hits them. BUFFY staggers slightly. SPIKE covers his mouth. They pause, woozy for a moment, then they look at each other. The lighting on the roof is no longer neon, it’s pure soft starlight. BUFFY and SPIKE look around themselves in wonder. BUFFY looks up to see a bluebird flying down. She laughs, girlishly and holds up her finger for it to land. She looks at it for an instant, then it flies away. SPIKE is gazing at her in adoration. She meets his gaze. He holds out his hand. SPIKE: Shall we dance … .my lady? [pause, then earnestly] My love. BUFFY takes his hand, solemnly, and they walk towards the stairs, trailing glittery dust. INT. ATRIUM DAWN is dancing with her handsome "prince". Couples are now waltzing around them. PRINCE: You’re the only woman in the room worth looking at. DAWN looks down, shyly. PRINCE: No need for modesty, my darling. You are a flower, a precious rose. She smiles, tenderly. DAWN: I didn’t dare hope to be so happy. It’s – it’s magic, I can tell. You’ve set me free. PRINCE: [blush rising in his fair-skinned face] What can I say, um – now I am the captive. Slave to love. CUT TO: FAITH, standing on the sidelines. There’s a murderous scowl on her face as she watches DAWN. CUT TO: ANDREW, running from a pack of wolves squealing like a little piggie and calling for … ANDREW: Patrick! Where are you! He leaps up onto a table, spilling a pitcher of wine. The wolves growl at him, but don’t attempt to climb up. ANDREW: Okay … breathe. [he closes his eyes and touches his thumbs and index fingers, meditation stylee] I am a creating a space to be myself, and accept myself with all my faults. I am an ocean of calm and … .[beat, he opens his eyes] Ok, I’m cool. Now … what would Captain Mal do? The wolves pad closer, growling. ANDREW shrieks again. Then he notices that, behind him, the lights have turned into wall-mounted torches. He picks one up and, with a yell, jumps down among the wolves, wielding his burning brand. ANDREW: Back! Back! Foul creatures of darkness! Back! The wolves run, whimpering. ANDREW stands proudly. The spell seems to be kicking in fully now – although, this is ANDREW, prince of fantasy, so who can say really. ANDREW: Patrick! My love … .I shall find you. No matter what occurs! He runs off – bounding like Aragorn – through the crowd,
to find his heart’s desire. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10-02-2005, 03:28 PM #5 Join Date: Jun 2004 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- INT. BALCONY EDGE: [graceless child’s grin] What you’re seeing – what you’re seeing is my kind of balls. DRU: [over one shoulder] Daddy ... DRU swings around suddenly and leans against the rail, looking at EDGE with an uncharacteristic directness. DRU: I can’t see the stars. EDGE: Oh love … they’ll be back. She slashes out with a nail, gashing EDGE’s cheek. DRU: You took them from me! EDGE grins. He rubs his cheek and inspects the blood on his hand. Then he steps closer to DRU, going to stroke her hair. She pulls back, then stops, looking at him. EDGE: When I’m done, everyone will be seeing stars … all the time. DRU: ... the stars. Can’t see the stars. Can’t see – the goldfish … EDGE looks at her for a moment, without expression, then claps his hands loudly. EDGE: [low and quiet in DRU’s ear] Never mind the stars, princess – I’ll get you the sun. [loudly] You’re over-excited, time to go home. No tears before bedtime, now. He takes DRU by the arm, peering over the balcony rail. EDGE: We lit the blue touch paper. Time to go home, kiddies. DRU: [pouty] I don’t feel myself. ETHAN: Shouldn’t we – stay and make sure the spell ... EDGE stares at him, still giving off that extraordinary satisfaction, but a dangerous note to his voice. EDGE: This is chaos, sonny Jim. The end is the means. D’you think we stay around and control this stuff? Wait until the Scoobie doobies pull off our masks and spank our bottoms? He grips ETHAN with his other arm, pulling both DRU and ETHAN to him. EDGE: Bed time for baby rabbits. This is just the beginning. PAN wide shot of their retreating backs down to the nightmare fairytale scene below and to ... FAITH hitching the halterneck further down her cleavage and advancing, a cross between Mistress Spanks-a-Lot and something really scarey, on DAWN smooching raptly with her PRINCE. She comes within a foot of them and stands, hands aggressively on hips, throwing her head back. FAITH: Hey, your highness! [PRINCE turns around and goggles] Why you wastin’ your time with the vanilla – doncha wanna bit of the dark stuff? PRINCE looks worried, mutters something and ducks past her. FAITH snarls and stalks slowly up to DAWN who is standing, wide-eyed and dismayed, looking after him. FAITH: You think you’re the fairest of them all, little sister? You think you’re gonna take what’s mine by rights? She leans forward suddenly and grabs DAWN by her hair. DAWN gasps and tries to twist away. FAITH: You get back to that trailer and – yeah, clean up the trash … [her eyes are unfocused] … little streetcorner trash. DAWN struggles away, only to stumble over a bottle on the floor. DAWN: Oh! Help! PRINCE: Get away from her! FAITH: [turning to him] Not until I’ve cut out her heart and fed it to the dogs. Then, we’ll have our perfect moment. She grabs DAWN by the hair again. The PRINCE looks on helplessly. He’s not the bravest knight in the forest. ETHAN, EDGE and DRU are passing them. DRU and ETHAN don’t register, but EDGE turns his head, smiling broadly at her, before they disappear. FAITH’s face appears, now very, very scarey. PAN from DAWN and FAITH to ETHAN, EDGE and DRU’s departing backs, high aerial shot across to the other side of the atrium and ... STAIRS TO ROOF SPIKE: Stay back! BUFFY does so, wide-eyed, as SPIKE leaps up, grabbing a chandelier, and giving it the full Errol Flynn, he swings feet first into the monster. It falls and he pulls a sword from underneath the folds of his coat, sticking the OGRE through. BUFFY looks on adoringly. SPIKE looks up at her, offering his hand. SPIKE: Come … are you afraid? BUFFY: Not with you here. She takes his hand and they continue down the stairs. Their walk is dance-like as they join the crowd of dancers. As they walk past the place where ANDREW valiantly took on the wolves, SPIKE sees the wine spilled on the ground. He pulls off his coat and flings it down, sweeping his arm around in a wide gesture that takes in the coat on the ground, ending with his hand pressed to his chest, head bowed. BUFFY nods and steps forward gracefully. A unicorn wanders past. But darker fairytale creatures are now massing – trolls and ogres, goblins and hideous beasts of all kinds. One ogre has a woman cornered. She’s screaming, mouth wide, terrified. FAITH is circling DAWN, full of menace. BUFFY and SPIKE begin to dance, oblivious to the danger. ACT IV INT. SCOOBY CENTRAL WILLOW and GILES are deep in the volumes. XANDER is staring at the ceiling from a half-tilted chair, CLAUDIA, looking tired and less than enthusiastic, is drinking from a bottle of water. HUGO is pacing aimlessly backward and forward in foreground of shot. Cellphone on the table rings and XANDER picks up quickly. XANDER: Xander’s House o’ Boredom.[listens] Hi, Andrew. You’re at the party? CLAUDIA: [pissed] Andrew got to go? GILES returns to the volume in front of him, looking irritated. CLAUDIA sighs. XANDER: What! ... Slow down. Wolves? As in were? [frowns] Unicorns? That doesn’t sound so…[listens, taken aback] OK, OK, we’re on our way. [beat, blinks] Um…thanks. He thrusts the chair back, pocketing the cellphone. XANDER: It’s a Buffy party. No – it’s a Buffy carnival. HUGO: Pteradactyls? They ignore him, pushing back chairs, following XANDER who is halfway to the door, shrugging on his jacket. XANDER: … big badness and ... [beat] Andrew just told me I was bold of heart with a mighty right hand to smite evil. Which I shall chalk up to fear and not analyse. GILES swings around suddenly, points a finger at CLAUDIA and HUGO. GILES: Stay. He’s out of the door. CLAUDIA looks at HUGO. She leans on her elbows. CLAUDIA: They won’t even let me go to the ball to fight. HUGO: Oh, poor woobie. I for one plan to use this Cinderella moment to get into Giles’s good scotch. INT. ATRIUM BUFFY: I’m so happy. SPIKE: You deserve to be. You’re exquisite … my princess. BUFFY smiles, her face glowing with joy. BUFFY: I love you William. SPIKE: Shhhh. BUFFY: There’s so much I want to tell you. SPIKE: You have forever to tell it. BUFFY: You’re right. I feel like this night could never end. SPIKE takes her hand and twirls her outwards, then pulls her gently closer into a chaste embrace. SPIKE: Come away with me. BUFFY: Wherever you want, my love. My sweet love. SPIKE: Oh Buffy, from the first moment I saw you, I knew. You’re the only woman I could ever love. BUFFY: I’ve always loved you. At that, SPIKE does a double take. SPIKE: What? BUFFY: [frowning] I – She shakes off her confusion and leans closer to him. SPIKE’s brow is furrowed. SPIKE: Something’s not right. BUFFY: Everything’s perfect! She’s gazing into his eyes. His face starts to slip back into blank ecstasy. SPIKE: [whispers] Everything’s perfect. [pulling back] No … it’s … this isn’t … BUFFY: Kiss me. SPIKE: … real. On S/TRACK the waltz cuts out. He leans forward gently. He kisses BUFFY on the lips, so softly. She kisses him back. The kiss becomes deeper and BUFFY’s hands slip inside the duster, running up over SPIKE’s chest. S/TRACK new music starts – dragging bass guitar. Joined by drum beat which bypasses romantic and goes straight for basic primitive urges. The lighting loses its squeaky-clean Disney gloss. PAN up with BUFFY’s hand, moving slowly toward SPIKE’s neck. SPIKE’s eyes snap open, staring past her alertly and then down, gazing into her face and he runs his hands down and grips BUFFY around the waist, pulling her forward. A sax whines on the S/TRACK and SPIKE’s hands slide up over BUFFY’s designer frock, his face shows he’s very much in the moment, but his gaze is focused. SPIKE: Buffy – this is real. The euphoria leaves BUFFY’s face, her eyes widen and focus, as they both register what is going on around them. Among the ecstatically entwined couples, dark creatures of legend and fairytale are pursuing terrified guests. A slim blonde girl runs past, batting helplessly at something half human, half frog which has clasped her in huge, mottled webbed feet. BUFFY reaches up, pulling SPIKE’s head down, pressing her lips to the base of his throat. His hands move to her shoulders, tightening. When she looks up and glances around, the unicorn has morphed back into an ice sculpture – which shatters under the blow from a troll’s hammer. The TROLL opens its mouth and roars over the relentless beat of the S/TRACK. It mutes. BUFFY: Was it – the kiss? SPIKE: [scarred eyebrow twitching] … and the rest. The bass beat on S/TRACK rises in sympathy with the roughness in his voice. Their gazes lock, understanding. SPIKE: We were never a fairy tale, luv BUFFY: We’re stopping the … fluffy. She turns her body slightly away from SPIKE, breaking the contact. PAN to shattered ice sculpture. It begins to re-assemble, the shape of the unicorn re-forming. BUFFY grips at SPIKE’s hands on her shoulders and nods at the stairs beside them – the stairs to the roof garden. SPIKE pulls his hands away, disbelieving, but BUFFY, wide-eyed and determined, grabs his left hand and they move towards the stairs. MOBILE SHOT follows, as they start clumsily up the steps, locked in a hard, passionate kiss. They come to a jerky halt as SPIKE puts one hand flat against the wall. He ducks his head. BUFFY pulls against him and he looks up. His brain clearly isn’t doing any thinking in this situation. BUFFY: For the greater good. For … good. Beat. SPIKE laughs, low in the throat, and pushes away from the wall. CUT TO EXT. ROOF GARDEN. NIGHT INT. ATRIUM DAWN and FAITH are staring at one another, panting. A confused boy – the PRINCE – is staring from one to the other. FAITH’s face is pale. FAITH: Oh … Dawn. DAWN rubs her throat. She smiles a little. DAWN: Getting the impression it wasn’t your fault. CUT TO: CLOSE on a pile of coats from a knocked-over rail starts to move. [whoever’s there tenses] Out of the pile emerges PATRICK, yawning his head off. ANDREW’s frozen to the spot. PATRICK: Mph … feels like I’ve been asleep a thousand years. [he blinks] ANDREW breaks his shock and rushes to PATRICK, helping him up and pulling him into an embrace. PATRICK is confused. ANDREW kisses him, passionately, then pulls back and gazes at him. ANDREW: I thought you were dead. I thought I’d never see you again. PATRICK: Not dead. Why would I be dead? ANDREW gazes at him adoringly and strokes back PATRICK’s mussed up hair. ANDREW: Don’t ever get killed…I love you. PATRICK gulps – shock and a mix of pleasure – but then ANDREW frowns. ANDREW: Or … no. [convincing himself] It was the spell. [PATRICK’s mouth thins dangerously] Anyhow, I think it’s over. PATRICK: [unenthused] Good. EXT. WESTIN HOTEL, NIGHT GILES: [annoyed] How much? XANDER and WILLOW, about to break into a run, turn and look back. WILLOW: Giles, come on! GILES: Oh, bloody ... [dangerous] look, friends of the Slayer [he gestures at Buffy’s height] blonde – thank you so much, we appreciate this more than I can say. He turns away and they all see ANDREW and PATRICK come out of the front doors, PATRICK stern, ANDREW moody. PATRICK: You must know. You said the Big Three words – for real or fairytale crapola? ANDREW: It’s this whole fantasy thing … PATRICK: What, in there? ANDREW: No [looks away] – all the time. PATRICK’s stern look dissolves. ANDREW: It’s the – the nature of reality is more complex than mortal minds can know. PATRICK: You’re an asshat, you know that? XANDER: [panting] Agreeing with your man here … not the time to get metaphysical – simple statements or I strike you down and you do not get up again. Simple question one – what happened in there? ANDREW: That’s not simple – and it’s stopped happening. WILLOW: Xander – Dawn, Faith. They all head towards the front entrance. CUT TO: INT. ATRIUM WILLOW: There! DAWN turns as they approach and rushes up to WILLOW, hugging her. FAITH hangs back, head averted. XANDER: Dawnie, are you all right? Now we ask the simple question again – what happened here? DAWN: Oh my god – splainy? You want simple for this? WILLOW: I think this is our chaos magic, second trick. DAWN: Dru was here. And, and Ethan ... FAITH glances up but down again immediately. GILES’s mouth clenches in a tight line. DAWN: ... and another man. WILLOW: [to XANDER] The plus one? Did you get a good look at him? DAWN: He...I was all marshmallow in the head. I don’t remember clearly. XANDER: Well, I smell cringing embarrassment and reasonably priced designer champagne on the carpet. GILES: I’m surprised Ethan isn’t still here. Perhaps he’s learning. WILLOW: We should check no one’s hurt…and there’s no lurky evil left. GILES and XANDER nods. GILES walks off and XANDER goes to follow him and gets a few paces away, then looks back to DAWN and FAITH. FAITH won’t meet DAWN’s eyes FAITH: I had my hands around your neck. I was gonna... DAWN: Faith…I’m all good. You’ve got a get out of jail free card…argh, crap….you know what I mean. You were just playing out the fairytale. FAITH: And I was automatically the twisted sister. DAWN: Well, my real sister locked me in the basement with a demon. This thing? Really no big. [beat] I should go find Buffy. I’m betting it was her that stopped the badness. DAWN smiles, little nod to FAITH, then walks off. XANDER approaches. XANDER: You ok? FAITH moves a lock of hair out of her eyes with a finger and looks away from him. FAITH: Thought I was gettin’ all shiny an’ I’m back on the bench first time the whistle blows. I thought…I was over this kind of thing. XANDER looks at her seriously. XANDER: Not gonna happen. FAITH: What? XANDER: I know we had a trip to Id-land to meet and greet our demons…but it keeps coming. FAITH folds her arms and looks around at the carnage. FAITH: Yeah. It does. XANDER: And that’s what I’m here for. FAITH: Lecturing me? XANDER: I prefer to think of it as a pep rally. FAITH: Add some pompoms and a skirt and I’d be listening to you with a smile on my face. XANDER: I haven’t got the legs. FAITH puts a hand on his shoulder. XANDER smiles. FAITH Thanks. There’s a pause. FAITH: Let’s go find Buffy. See how she saved the day. They walk off together across the hall and the camera pans across the emptying party. EXT. ROOF GARDEN, NIGHT CUT TO SPIKE: His eyes meet hers with the same unveiled look – not adoration, but directness, mingled with curiosity. SPIKE raises a hand and strokes his fingers down the length of her arm. Then he pulls her down closer and she rolls beside him. They’re lying side by side, facing each other, SPIKE’s arms around BUFFY, her hands on his chest. The camera frames their faces and shoulders. A few beats and then … . BUFFY [very quiet]: Hello. SPIKE: Hello Buffy. They stare at each other, transferring the closeness of bodies to eyes. Pause. BUFFY shivers. Immediately SPIKE leans over, looking around, and sees his coat. He pulls it over her. She snuggles into it. SPIKE moves back close to her, propped up on his elbow, looking at her. She’s lying back, looking up at him. She smiles. BUFFY: [gently] It's cold. One corner of SPIKE's mouth tenses slightly. SPIKE: … am I cold? BUFFY's eyes run over his face. She looks ahead, still smiling. BUFFY: Warm enough. SPIKE's face relaxes and he leans over, running the tips of his fingers along her collarbone. BUFFY catches his hand, holds it to her. He leans his head on his other hand and gazes, eyes warm and intent. BUFFY: [businesslike] We need new names. SPIKE [playful serious, understanding]: New names, eh? Uhm … Joan and Randy? BUFFY: William and Anne? SPIKE: Too royal. I think we’ve had enough courtly romance for one night. BUFFY: How about something exotic. What's exotic for William? She strokes SPIKE's imprisoned hand slowly with her thumb. SPIKE: Mmm … [bluffing, intimate] Guillermo. BUFFY: Somehow, Latino doesn’t suit you. SPIKE: Right. Don’t have the colouring. [beat] Bloody names. BUFFY: Bloody ruddy names. SPIKE's eyes glint. He pulls his hand away from BUFFY's clasp and begins to trace a path downwards, gazing at his fingers. SPIKE: Yours is fine. Yours is … SPIKE closes his eyes, looks away and his shoulders judder slightly. BUFFY stares at him, wide-eyed, and retrieves his hand. Intensity with a hint of pain on SPIKE’s face – which relaxes and SPIKE opens his eyes again. SPIKE: You don't change your name. Ever. BUFFY: [her fingers interlocking with his] I wasn’t … SPIKE: Never. Change. Your. Name. BUFFY: No, no changing … SPIKE: If you knew the number of times...just saying your name… BUFFY: ’kay. SPIKE: 'Sides, you're not gonna call me Randy. BUFFY smiles a slow wicked smile, and she makes a sinuous movement [clearly pelvic, though out-of-frame]. BUFFY [faux innocent, pouts] So – you're not randy? SPIKE takes an unneeded breath, smiles widely, leaning closer again. BUFFY shivers. SPIKE immediately leans back. CLOSE on SPIKE BUFFY [O.S] We should go check … the yelling’s stopped, so, I’m guessing … no more fairytale. SPIKE: You need to get some clothes on [sound of rustling. His eyes narrow, single-minded] … but – don’t rush, luv. BUFFY: [O.S muffled] … Dawn – the others, we must … From complete openness, as he watches her, SPIKE’s face suddenly closes painfully. SPIKE: [quietly, leaning over and picking up his clothes] Yeah, we should check. CLOSE on BUFFY, now dressed but dishevelled, she shakes her hair free. BUFFY: [looking down] You’re staying. SPIKE: [O.S] I’m not going. BUFFY: Last time I saw you – you told me to go … SPIKE comes into shot, dressed in t-shirt and pants, pulling on the duster and stands in front of BUFFY, not touching. SPIKE: I’m staying, Buffy. BUFFY steps forward, putting her head against his chest, holding him around the waist under the duster. BUFFY: I let you go … left you there. SPIKE’s face is O.S. SPIKE: Buffy? CLOSE on BUFFY’s face, SPIKE still out of shot. SPIKE: I’ve been back a while. BUFFY: [wiped of expression] You’ve been back a while. Her eyes are closed, struggling with the feelings. She brings one hand up, clenched into a fist, but opens it when SPIKE draws away. SHOT opens to include SPIKE’s face, eyes painfully shut. BUFFY, eyes bright with hurt, then fury, grabs the lapels of his duster with one hand while she thrusts her other hand into the left pocket. BUFFY: I think I’ll have that cigarette … SPIKE: [opening his eyes] You don’t smoke. BUFFY: [mouth working] I. just. started! She takes her hand out of his pocket and grabs SPIKE’s left hand, forcing it up to his shoulder. He tries to pull away. BUFFY: What did you not understand about "I love you"? She forces SPIKE’s hand open and lays her right hand flat against the palm, closing her fingers, reproducing the handclasp in the hellmouth, until SPIKE looks at her directly, eyes bright with what could be tears. BUFFY releases his hand, steps back. BUFFY: [swallowing] I let you go … and you stayed away. Where? SPIKE: Wolfram and Hart. BUFFY: [horrified] What….did they do to you? SPIKE: Nothing. I…chose to stay. [strained smile] Free will, no shackles. BUFFY: [tears starting] Why? SPIKE: [dragging the words out] I couldn’t believe you meant it – not the man I was. BUFFY: You were the man who stood there and let himself burn – SPIKE: I was up to that. BUFFY: But not to let me love you, Spike? SPIKE stares at her with fixed desperation. BUFFY tilts her head back and takes a long breath. BUFFY: ...So. Now. Why are you back? SPIKE: There are worse things than being loved by you, Buffy. BUFFY: [half-smiling, half-crying] Not that many. Me loving people…often bad for people. SPIKE: I’ve done things never thought I’d….so I’m not scared any more. BUFFY: What things? SPIKE: Certain death. Reciting poetry in a biker bar – watching Angel’s back without stickin’ a sharp sword in it [brow furrows] ... well, there was that one time but on general principles ... Angel. [he looks at her, uncertain] Buffy ...Angel’s… BUFFY: Gone. I know [off Spike’s look]. Vision stuff. SPIKE: Oh. BUFFY: And I know he’s gone, but not ... gone gone. SPIKE: [smiles] Yeah. Shaft of light, wingy chariot…figuratively speaking. Seems it’s him that moved on in the end. BUFFY stares at SPIKE. They’re standing close. BUFFY: ... and you were ... here but not here and now, you’re here here. Words are lame. [shakes her head firmly] Let’s go check on the party. SPIKE: You and me, Buffy – what happens next? BUFFY: We’re now. Not what’s been happening, not thinking about what’s going to happen. We’ve always been just – now, Spike. SPIKE: Go and check? BUFFY: Let's go … They push open the door. As they walk down the stairs… BUFFY: Andrew made us have a vigil for you, you know. With candles. SPIKE glances sideways at her, with a smile. SPIKE: Did he now? Boy’s full of surprises. CUT TO: STAIRS TO THE ROOF GARDEN BUFFY: There ... Dawn and Faith – and Andrew – all ok. And…[seeing the others] Giles? Xander? She starts forward. SPIKE: [to himself] Oh bloody hell. Full Scooby firing squad. BUFFY realises SPIKE is still standing at the foot of the stairs and turns back. SPIKE: You go on – I might nip off, have a bit of a rest, be ready for big hugs when I’m fresh. BUFFY: [exasperated] Oh for - - Spike! What happened to biker bar and facing the worst and… you can’t say hi to my friends? SPIKE looks seriously rattled. He takes an unnecessary breath and smiles in a clenched way and nods. BUFFY: I can’t wait to see their faces when they see you’re back. SPIKE: [clenched teeth] Me too. BUFFY: [tugging at his sleeve with enthusiasm] They’re going, better catch up!
Out of the front entrance come XANDER, GILES, WILLOW, FAITH and DAWN, PATRICK and ANDREW. S/TRACK Times Square buzz – traffic, late night partying, siren in distance. They walk along the pavement, deep in conversations. BUFFY: (O/S) Hey! CLOSE on DAWN: DAWN: [turning] Buffy! [reaction shot] and .... CLOSE on BUFFY and SPIKE standing together, not touching. BUFFY half-smiling. SPIKE stands casually, no fidgeting. Careful expression. SPIKE: Hi. [raises an eyebrow at Buffy] See. Piece of piss. CLOSE on PATRICK, wary. Then turning to ANDREW. PATRICK: Gone, huh? ANDREW smiles, guilty. CLOSE on DAWN, eyes beginning to fill with tears. DAWN: Spike ... In unbelieving silence REACTION SHOT of XANDER, GILES, WILLOW. XANDER: Ok, Buffy…little splainy? BUFFY: [chipper] Spike’s back, we broke the spell. XANDER: That’s little. [he blinks, still reeling] Silence. CLOSE on WILLOW. WILLOW: How – er, how ...? Starting with the immediate…how did you stop the badness…? BACK to BUFFY and SPIKE. BUFFY’s gaze flickers, SPIKE still steady BUFFY: A kiss. You know. Standard fairytale mojo-breaker WILLOW (O/S): That must have been ... a long kiss. SPIKE: [glancing at BUFFY] Long enough. BUFFY’s mouth struggles unsuccessfully with a deep smile. CLOSE on GILES. GILES: [eyes tight shut, almost unheard, look of utter disgust] Oh God...Lord...no! The scoobs – apart from GILES - all surge around SPIKE, firing off questions, we hear the babble. SPIKE cornered as ANDREW embraces him, then quickly pulls away at a glare from PATRICK. DAWN gives SPIKE a slower hug. XANDER shakes his head in disbelief. GILES: [to himself, grimly] Come the final apocalypse, all that’ll be left ….cockroaches…and Spike. CREDITS ROLL: James Marsters as Spike FADE TO BLACK
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