Come on. Give me a little feel. A little touch. A little bit o' fondlin', maybe. You know you want to.
Well, now that that's finished, let's talk about this page. I like to talk . . . a lot . . . and no matter how much AOL thinks it's going to limit my ability to make friends by not giving me the right to have an infinite amount of buddies on my Instant Messenger, I'm determined to fill my list with interesting people whose first question to me every day isn't, "Hey, baby, are you wearing panties?" (That question should come up later in the conversation, though, mind you.) I also desperately need mountains of e-mail in which you proclaim your undying love for me and/or my hair several times amidst a sea of sexual innuendo. Think you can cut it? Learn all of the ways to contact me. However, if you're shy and would rather read e-mails from me in which I proclaim my love for your hair and proposition you for sex, learn yourself on the wonders of my mailing list.