By B-chan
�Ahhhhh,� the voluptuous blonde woman sighed, leaning back in her beach chair and smiling brightly at the flawless blue sky. �This is the life! No worries, no missions, and best of all, no one shooting at me! Bliss, pure bliss!�
The man on the beach chair next to her, clad only in a pair of deep crimson swimming shorts, laughed heartily and raised his margarita in salute to her. �Ah, yes, this certainly is quite the place to vacation, isn�t it? I�ve always loved the beaches of California. They�re always so peaceful.�
Of course, this beach was deserted, as it was hidden between two crags of cliffs, and was only accessible by swimming a mile and a half through shark-infested underwater caverns in pitch darkness. But this was not an issue for Laura Ulrich, AKA United States Calamity Taskforce (USCT) Special Agent Librarian B-chan, and Karasu Thomas, AKA USCT Special Agent Raven. They were the top agents for the USCT, specializing in mass gatherings of unauthorized protestors, especially those who were led by terrorists bent on world destruction.
They were an unlikely duo, Karasu being tall, handsome, and painfully shy, and Laura being short, lovely, and painfully social. Karasu stood at five foot eleven inches, with a bass of curly black hair, currently plastered to the top of his wet head, and startling brown eyes with flecks of green in them. He specialized in hidden weapons, and marksmanship. Laura stood only five foot four inches, and was curvier than most women, having wider hips, larger breasts that she seemed to vastly enjoy showing off with a low cut shirt and push-up bra, and well-rounded limbs. This belied her speed and agility, however, for she was frequently scared potential rioters with her physical antics to get them to disperse. She specialized in hand to hand combat, and was an expert markswoman.
Together the two agents had broken nearly every crime ring that exploited teens and young adults, and were feared among the terrorists of the world. Now, they relaxed on their two-week leave, and what better way to start a vacation than to take a dangerous swim with no oxygen or diving equipment?
Laura lifted her own margarita to her lips, taking a long, deep drink, closing her eyes. Suddenly, an annoying cell phone burst through the calm sounds of the ocean, and Laura spit her margarita out in annoyance and shock.
Karasu groaned. �Oh, please, not now! We�re on LEAVE!�
Laura growled and reached into the bag that had been airlifted along with the crates of food, alcohol, and other living necessities, to their location. It held her personal belongings, including her small, silver cellular telephone with the cute little Sailor Moon keychain hanging off of it. She flipped it open and snarled into the receiver.
�No. Absolutely not. I don�t care who is it, or why it is, but send it to someone else!�
Karasu watched her face turn from red, to white, then back to red as she answered questions in clipped, short tones. She was saying a lot of �Yes, sir� and �No, sir�, and Karasu knew that had been the Commander who was calling, and not the cheerfully dense secretary, Mary. He waited patiently until she hung up the phone before speaking.
�Well? What did the Commander want?�
She took off her sunglasses and set her phone back into her bag with a sigh. �The Commander apologizes for interrupting our leave, but knows that we are the best for this job. There�s a huge gathering of women in front of the DC Comics Headquarters in Los Angeles. Apparently they�re protesting something, but their leader is suspected of subjugating these women into his massive army, and they are apparently bent on world domination.�
"Aren�t they always?� Karasu asked ruefully as the sand beneath their chairs fell away into a deep, black hole, and they fell gracefully into the darkness.
�No more edits! Give us the whole deal! No more edits! Give us the whole deal!�
The thousands of chanting teenagers crowded the grounds of the Headquarters, all holding aloft copies of Japanese comic books, or manga. They were all of various ages, colors, races, and creeds, but they were united in common fury. Laura watched them from the top of the building, where she and Karasu had been dropped off moments earlier by a stealth helicopter. She already had her binoculars out, and Karasu was busily setting up the microphone and speakers so they could register what was happening below them.
Laura scanned the crowds, trying to pinpoint a leader, or dominant group. She found him in the very front of the crowd, a young man, in his late twenties by her estimation, dressed in camouflaged pants and shirt, with a matching bandana around his head. He stood around the same height as Karasu, with a straightforward, handsome face, and a strong, solid build. He stood before the masses with a megaphone in one hand, and a copy of some book called Tenjou Tenge in the other.
�What do we want?� he screamed into the megaphone.
�No more edits!� the women screamed back at him.
�When do we want them?�
�NOW!�
Karasu chuckled at the ardent reply of the followers to the charismatic leader, whom most of the women referred to as General Drazz-sama. He turned to look at Laura to plan their next move, but found her rooted to the spot, staring through the binoculars, her face pale and her back rigid.
�Drazz�� she whispered softly, taking the binoculars away from her wide blue eyes.
Karasu stared at her, a soft horror growing in the pit of his stomach. He always knew that Laura had ties to the underground through family and friends, but he never dreamed that she could whisper the name of a suspected terrorist with such gentleness. He reached over and grabbed her shoulder, making her look at him.
�Don�t tell me you know this nutcase, Laura, please don�t,� he begged her harshly.
She looked away from his eyes, back down into the masses. Her voice was soft as she spoke. �His wife was my first mission. Back before you joined the USCT. She is a widely popular manga artist, beloved by her readers. Richard Townsend, Codename Drazz writes the stories, and his wife, Shannon Townsend, Codename Rokugatsu draws them. They are a nearly unstoppable force, but for some reason they never did anything like this. Last I heard they were in Chicago, working on their next novel. I just talked to his wife last week, and she didn�t mention anything about Drazz leading this army!�
Karasu�s jaw dropped. �Wait a minute� you mean not only do you know this guy, you�re his friend?!�
She smiled softly and stood up, shaking off his hands from her shoulders, squaring them back. �He�s one of the best friends I have,� she replied. �He�s not a terrorist. And he certainly wouldn�t have to subvert anyone to join whatever cause he�s fighting for this time. This is a legitimate, peaceful protest. Let�s just observe for a while.�
And with that, she sat down on the ledge, her feet dangling out over the edge, kicking slightly back and forth, ignoring her shocked partner.
Inside the building, the Headquarters was readying its own Taskforce to deal with the threat to its sales. Armed with piles of free manga giveaways, exclusive prints of artwork, and coupons to various Japanese restaurants in the area, the Marketing Taskforce of DC Comics was prized for their ability to repel massive groups of rabid fans by the art of distraction and bribery. They were the most powerful and realistic androids ever built by gaming technology, sprung from the mind of Bill Gates himself. The technology mogul had sold his soul to DC Comics long ago for a copy of the complete collection of The Batman comics.
Unbeknownst to their targets, all of the products the android guards were to distribute were actually brainwashing devices used to bring otaku and comic boys to heel. One touch of any of the pages or leaflets would cause the members of the FGA to fall helpless at the feet of DC comics. Of course, if those failed, they were also equipped with the very latest in stun-gun technology.
The lead operative of the DC Marketing Taskforce was aptly codenamed Commander Soap, due to his ability to rub clean the sweaty, unclean bodies and souls of comic book fans and otaku all over the world. Comic book stores had been terrified of him for decades, knowing that to see him coming was to know that your store had just become blacklisted for not selling enough DC merchandise. Once he appeared, the doomed comic book store became one of two things: a pile of dust and rubble, or something so horrifying that none of the previous tenants or customers would dare enter; a Disney Store.
His plan was simple. Separate the leadership from the masses, and subvert as many of the members of the FGA as possible, turning them into mindless zombies intent on buying DC Comics manga no matter how many edits were in it. Those who refused to submit, well� what did a few more bodies buried in the basement mean to him as long as his company continued to rule the dorks and otaku of the world? It was a necessary evil!
He led his men slowly into the California sunlight, safe behind his sunglasses. The tactical gear of all the men was stowed safely under flowing trench coats of various colors, and long black wigs of real human hair. The DC Marketing Taskforce knew that to get close enough to use their brainwashing technology they had to be able to appeal to the masses. What better way to get close to the members of an angry female otaku army than to adopt the dress and look of the handsome �bad boy� persona from popular shoujo manga?
General Drazz stood in the front of his troops, his bandana and loose-fitting camos flapping slightly in the wind that had begun to whirl around his army. His hands were clenched in rage, furious that they would send such pretty boys to battle his finely tuned FGA. This was not worthy of his women! It was an insult!
He turned to his troops, his voice carrying out over the masses, silencing them instantly.
�Ladies, this is the moment of truth! We must not back down! We must not let them deter us! No matter what they promise, no matter what they demand, WE MUST NOT BACK DOWN UNTIL WE GET WHAT WE WANT! ARE YOU WITH ME?!�
The massive army of fangirls screamed their assent and support of their beloved General, the man who had brought them out from behind the wool of innocence that had blinded them to the truth about their beloved manga.
As he stepped forward his Command staff stepped fanned out behind him, their faces strongly resolute, forming two lines. First Sergeant Akari Hoshi, Head Nurse Mamasherz, Drill Sergeant Lorichan, and Private First Class (PFCs) Floweramon, JDragon, Linley, Shi, Akiame, Dreamcatcher, and Sacred Neko were the first and finest troops he had collected, and followed him devoutly. They would fight to the death if need be against the massively destructive power of the DC Marketing Taskforce.
Commander Soap called his men to a stop about a hundred yards from the massive army before him, his cold, hard gaze staring down the line of teenage girls. Several of them wilted beneath his gaze, melting back deeper into the ranks. His laugh cut through their strong aura, causing them to hesitate.
�Come now, �General Drazz�!� he called as the General and his Command staff came to a halt. �Is this any way to treat the corporation who has filled your dreams for your entire life? Where is the justice in harming those who only wished to bring you joy? Come inside, and let us talk with the President. She will grant a special audience with General Drazz alone. The rest of you will wait here!�
The DC Marketing Taskforce spread out in a long line, each of them smiling kindly at the girls, who swooned. Commander Soap smiled behind his sunglasses, knowing that all they had to do was remove the General from the masses to be able to freely distribute the brainwashing technology. And once they had him in their hands, he could be turned to their side, and launch a massive marketing campaign using his wife�s popularity and his new-found fame. It was a flawless plan!
General Drazz, who had been conferring with his Command staff, stepped forward, standing straight and tall as he walked across the battlefield towards the Marketing Taskforce. Behind him, the Command staff cried for him to stop, saying that he should take some of them with him. He turned in the middle of the field, raising one hand and smiling at them all triumphantly, flashing a thumbs-up signal of encouragement. He felt that this was indeed a trap, but trusted his FGA to fight valiantly while he made his way to the topmost offices of the DC Headquarters himself.
When he turned back towards his enemy, he froze in place, staring in shock. Two huge billowing parachutes were directly in front of him. As they settled to the soft grass, the two figures owning the chutes straightened, their gunbelts and weapons already out, glittering in the morning sunlight. He gaped at them, spying the USCT patches on the sleeves of their skintight, black leather uniforms. The female�s patch caught his eye. A green field, with three gold bars, and a silver book in the middle as a crest, with the words Intelligence emblazoned across the bottom. His heart soared.
�Librarian B-chan!� he whispered.
The woman spoke without turning from her chosen enemy, her angry voice carrying all the way up to the highest windows of the DC Headquarters, where the President and her advisor stood watching the conflict.
�DC Comics, you have been found guilty in violating Article XVII of the Peaceful Takeover of American Underworld Literature Pact of 2004!�
Commander Soap arrogantly bustled forward a few paces. �What are you talking about? We know of no such article!�
The Raven beside Librarian B-chan spoke now, low and harsh. �Article XVII of the PTAUL Pact expressly forbids the use of physical force and covert planning against peaceful protests to any and all written materials distributed by ANY major publishing corporation. By planning to use brainwashing technology on this FGA, your underhanded censorship of transplanted literature distributed in your stores, and by your blatant destruction of comic book shops all over the country, you have violated the treaty passed down to you by the United States Calamity Taskforce and the American Library Association.�
Up in her tower office, the President paled at these words being forwarded to her via the satellite communication system installed in the grounds of the building.
Librarian B-chan continued. �In accordance with this violation of the treaty, you are hereby ordered to surrender to all demands of the offended party. If you refuse to comply, we are authorized to force you to comply by any means necessary. Stand down, disarm, and open the doors, Commander Soap!�
�NEVER!� he screamed back, raising an arm and ordering his troops forward.
The Raven moved like water over rocks, dashing down the long line of armed Taskforce guards, twin whips snatching all the guns from their hidden hostlers inside their coats and flinging them into the air. Librarian B-chan produced a flame thrower, and, throwing open the nozzle, doused the firearms with molten fire, melting all the guns in midair. They clattered to the ground, useless lumps of metal and gunpowder. She grinned wolfishly over at the General, who grinned back.
�Just like old times, eh, Drazz? Order your Command team to follow Raven�s orders. He�ll take good care of them. You and I have a date with a President,� she said, sheathing all her weapons except for a long metal fighting stick. She whirled it above her head a few times before pointing it menacingly at the massive army before them, striking a perfectly executed Awesome Fighting Pose. Beside her, General Drazz took out a long whip and chain, spinning them around his body in intricate waves before striking his own perfect Awesome Fighting Pose beside her.
A huge explosion to the left flank shook the ground beneath their feet. Dozens of android guards burst into little bits of gears and metal, dust rolling out in a huge cloud around them. From the dust ran two women, dashing full-out along the long line of bare ground between the two armies. The FGA stared in shock, and then screamed their triumph and joy.
Shannon Townsend, Codename Rokugatsu, the beloved freelance artist of the super-popular Otaku no Yen series, skidded to a stop beside her husband, her matching camo outfit not even slightly rumpled. Beside her, already grabbing another bomb, stood Rokugatsu�s personal bodyguard and best friend, Nicole, Codename Nobaku, Head of Demolitions and Protection for the Townsend family. She wore a black trench coat, the insides of which the Raven could see were lined with all sorts of fun explosive ordinance.
Rokugatsu smiled at Librarian B-chan and General Drazz, stepping between them and clapping them both on a shoulder. �You think you can just run off together and save the day without me? I wouldn�t miss this for the world! Nobaku, help Raven.�
She brought her hands together, producing a set of katanas, the hilts carved of fine ivory to resemble paint brushes, and whipped them around in tight circles, spinning around twice before stopping in her own Awesome Fighting Pose. Nobaku and Raven moved into a line behind the trio, striking their own Awesome Fighting Poses.
The world stood still for a few precious heartbeats before they all surged forward as one entity. The FGA hesitated only an instant before charging after their leaders, chanting the name of General Drazz at the top of their lungs.
END PART 1
ON TO PART 2!!!!!!!