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The Cyber-Assembly of $ecular Hedonists

AND

The "C*A*$*H" Sound Archives

Present...

Preacher Creature Theatre!



Special Feature!

wav

125 Kb


Bob Larson --

"No, you don't understand. I have sex with the Devil. I Have SEX with the Devil. In fact, on a regular basis, I mean, on a WEEKLY basis, I... you know... go into the woods and dance naked."




Yes, they actually said this... well... not necessarily in this ORDER But... They DID Say this stuff!


Okay, okay... I Confess! The messages on this page have been digitally altered from the original. But, let's face it... with these Radio Preachers... the amount of alteration required is usually very minimal. However, I assure you... What you hear on this page HAS Indeed been taken OUT OF CONTEXT... And, although the various and sundry Radio Preachers ARE responsible for transmitting their words across the airwaves and into my living room... They Are NOT Responsible for what I have done with them once they came into MY possession.

The "mutilated" product presented here is for Entertainment Purposes Only.

Files are in RealAudio or Wav format as noted.

Enjoy.


The C*A*$*H Audio Files

Sounds of The Preacher Creatures!!

Preacher
----
Kenneth Copeland
(Believer's Voice of Victory)

Format

File Size

Description

wav

21.4 Kb


"Oooohhh... HOoooooo... Heouooueeoooaa....
Who KNOooows what Lurks in the Hearts of Men?...
The Shadow Knows!"

Preacher

----

Fred Coulter
(Christian Biblical Church of God)

This one is listed in the Freebie Archives... The Tapes and Literature just Keep on Coming!

Format

File Size

Description

wav

117 Kb

"All Souls form but ONE Entity with the Divine Soul. God is Both... the Many and the ONE!"

wav

105 Kb

"God doesn't want ta be Totally bothered with every thought of every human being and every action and every sin that's going on... God would go Nuts!"

Preacher

----


Creflo Dollar
(Creflo Dollar Ministries)

Format

File Size

Description

RA

86.0 Kb

Dr. Dollar Demonstrates... The Christian Mind-Renewal Technique!

You are getting Sleepy... Soooo Sleeepy... You are Completely within my Power...
You will Repeat after me and... You will Obey my Every Word...

Preacher

----

"Lets Go" with BILL FAYE

Bill says he left Organized Crime, Gambling, Prostitution and Big Business to become a Full-Time Preacher... Kinda makes you wonder where the REAL Money is! Hmmm?

Format

File Size

Description

RA

65.1 Kb

"I have the freedom to walk away... Do you?"
[Bloodletting in the Name of Satan]

RA

33.4 Kb

"Is there a Flight Attendant in YOUR Life?"

RA

43.5 Kb

"YOU have to Infiltrate YOUR Community!"

Preacher

----

"Talk Back" with Bob Larson

Beggin' Bob spends most of his Air Time selling stuff but... When he opens his mouth...
Preacher Creature Theatre is Guaranteed a Good SoundByte!

Format

File Size

Description

RA

105 Kb

Bob interviews the President of Lifeline about their new policy on Telephone Porn lines.

RA

226 Kb

Where else could you find... The Deep, Spiritual Teachings of... Charles Manson... for only $99!

RA

169 Kb

Yes! The Lost Tapes of Charles Manson can be YOURS!

Wav

22.5 Kb

Burn, Baby, Burn! Bob's Qualifications for a "Good Church".

Preacher

----

"South West Radio Church" with -- Dr. Noah Hutchings
His Co-Conspirators -- Dr. Larry Spargamino and Dr. Bob Glaze
[AND... A Myriad of Guest Speakers!]

The Ministry where EVERYONE is a "doctor"... This is THE place to hear ALLL the latest Christian Conspiracy Theories! [And... while you're at it... Pick up a SoundByte or two!]

Format

File Size

Description

wav

42.4 Kb

Spargamino: "Perhaps the worst deception of all... is Religious Deception."

wav

55.6 Kb

Hutchings: "Mr. Hank Hanegraff IS... Nothing! So, don't pay any attention to 'im."

wav

77.9 Kb

Glaze: "Jesus wore long hair... Jesus Wore Long HAIR... In Every picture I have ever seen of Jesus, He had Long Hair."

wav

78.0 Kb

Glaze: "Jesus was a Man's Man! He led REAL Men not a bunch of Half-Men, Half-Women, Homosexuals or a Milque-Toast Shrinking Violet!"



And NOW... The FUN Stuff!

Thoroughly devoted to your entertainment, the tireless Volunteers of the Cyber-Assembly of $ecular Hedonists have scoured the darkest corners of the C*A*$*H Sound Archives in an effort to bring together some of the Funniest SoundBytes and... Some of the Most Outrageous Preachers ever to Spout their Pious Propaganda into a Microphone! For your listening pleasure, the C*A*$*H Sound Archives Proudly Presents...

Attack of The Preacher Creatures!!
(The Audio Collage Collection)


wav

263 Kb

Dr. Bob Glaze and Fred Coulter discuss the finer points of the Holy Hairdo.

wav

175 Kb

Bob George shares something... "Personal".
Homer Simpson is taken aback and...
Hank Hanegraff is on hand to give a little helpful advice!




Oh Yeah... There's a LOT more where these came from!
So, keep checking in from time to time to hear the latest additions!

And, Don't forget about the UNEDITED SoundBytes
That's Right! You can Get it Straight from...

The Horse's Mouth!


wav

68.9 Kb


Hank Hanegraff, The Bible Answer Man, said --

I would RUN, not Walk...
It's REALLY Important that you get it Right From...
The Horse's Mouth.



(Sometimes... You've just got to let them say it in their OWN Words!)


Warning! Propaganda like this...
Will Rot Your MIND!!


Counter
(But... At least you won't be alone!)



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