GEORGE THE MOOSE PROFILE
Many questions arise when discussing the the moose, the myth, the legend, George The Moose. While it's not known where George The Moose was raised, how he got to be so large, or even any of his relatives, many different stories have popped up over the years. One historian, Randolph Hoobenbogger, claims that George The Moose was abandoned by his parents and left to be raised by wild buffalo. While this almost seems logical at first, it really isn't, as George The Moose has never been affiliated publicly with any buffalo. He's known for being a vigalanty super hero, but has never halped out any buffalo. Another theory, the one that is most widely believed, is that George The Moose was basically abandoned as a small child, raised himself, and ate plenty of Wheaties. George The Moose is also known for having rivalries with several people. His first major confrontation with a famous type is his epic brawl with Santa Claus, as the white bearded drunk was abusing his reindeer, George The Moose took it upon himself to teach him a lesson. The old fart put up a good fight in a near war that lasted several days, but George The Moose came out the victor. There were many spectators to this, so a lot of stories rose, the majority claim that George The Moose ended it by hitting Santa with a sub-atomic snowball, but many other rumors spread, some even saying that Santa nearly slipped on a bananna peel and knocked himself out. Either way, George The Moose beat him and freed the reindeer in the end. Years later Santa would even try and reignite that feud by threatening the legend, but it just never really happened. After this the general public pretty much forgot about George The Moose until a fight that even exceeded the boundaries of chaos that Santa Claus vs. George The Moose did ignited. Aunt Mars was known through out the world as a ruthless meanie and finally George The Moose got sick of it as he announced his disgust for the creature. It didn't take long for Aunt Mars to retaliate as she attacked him from behind one day while he was visiting The Easter Bunny in Illinois. The battle then began in full force as the two gigantic monsters did battle for many many days, exceeding way beyond anything. Houses were destroyed, forests were burnt down, and villages were stomped over. Thankfully casualties were low, only three lives were taken, but unfortunately, many injuries were also reported, many other surely not reported. The war ended in what was almost a tragedy, on the shore to the Antlantic Ocean in New York City. The fight was heavily documented. George The Moose heroicly heaved Aunt Mars onto a boat hauling many piles of manure to China 9it's gotta go somewhere). She sank in the mess, preventing her from escape, and has never been seen from again, although legend has it that she is plotting against our hero as we speak. Since then, we've not heard much from George The Moose, but he is sure to make an impact on our world sometime, somewhere, in the near future.
