“Um…I forgot what team we’re on.”
“All these PR guys are the same, so I’m just gonna call them all Patrick. It saves time.”
“Freud would have a heyday with us.”
“There’s gonna be, like, rabid gophers…”
“Oh, he has a big gun? Then I never asked that.”
“It’s supposed to be a nonviolent mission!”
“I know! That’s why I’m asking for a nonviolent way of taking them out!”
“If the band of roving research scientists manages to take you down…”
“I don’t mind dictators, but I hate communists.”
“Those are the two things my guy is scared of. Communism and anthrax.”
“This is the 22nd century. We’ve surpassed the need for rope.”
“I wanna try to interface with that device again.”
“In public?”
“How much nothing did you say you saw?”
“A lot.”
“It’s just beautiful. It’s not gorgeous.”
“Oh. I don’t wanna talk about it, then.”
“You’re big, friendly, and not from Orgotek. Schmoozing is not something they want to do with you.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name yet.”
“That’s nice.”
“Madrid! You’re gorgeous! Let me juggle your young!”
“Well, I don’t start asking questions until there’s a lead-in or until he’s good and liquored up. Whichever comes first.”
“He doesn’t talk about business, even when he’s drunk. Then he talks about women and how much he hates them.”
“There’s gotta be a reason he hates women, and I’m betting it’s because they won’t have sex with him.”
“I like the way you think. You got one a them thinkin’ brain things goin’ on.”
“You just earned one point in Pretending To Be Drunk.”
“Actually, it’s more like Hope, Sacrifice, Bribery in this case.”
“This is no kind of science fiction game if there’s no flying cars.”
“It’s strange, this whole being the good guys business…”
The punchline to a joke which is ridiculously difficult
to transcribe, so I won’t even try:
“How long have you lived here, Mr….Anderson?”
“I’ll do it, I’ll do it. How do you want me to knock it down…ma’am?”
“Hey, you can’t do that!”
“Yes, I can, because I just did.”
“That’s it. I flash-freeze the phone.”
“The Aeon Trinity: saving humanity by wrecking some guy’s apartment.”
“First I buy him an apartment, and then I punch him in the nose. That’s just the way the Aeon Trinity works.”
“Please don’t say the words ‘vibrating pack’ ever again.”
“We’re an altruistic group bent on helping the human race…”
“Hope, Torture, Unity. Gotcha.”
“I love how we’re not like, ‘From now on, we don’t wreck people’s apartments.’ We’re like, ‘From now on, we take off our badges before we wreck people’s apartments.”
“Using my charming personality and my getting-drunk skills…”
“We’re gonna need some more bullets out here. We’ve been running into a lot of hostile senior citizens.”
“So you’re giving yourself a telekinetic hand job?”
“My response to that? ‘Shut up, whore!’”
“I’m heating up my yellow feces!”
“First session, I was silent. Second session, I was happy and jovial. Now, I just want bullets.”
“Well, tell him not to break any doors while he’s at it!”
“This is so not tag-team prostitution.”
“…Because apart from the fact that I’m half Argentinian and half Chinese and he looks like the Crocodile Hunter, yes, we’re totally related.”
“He looks like he’s hangin’ with Mr. Cooper!”
“I just lost all respect for your former employers.”
“That’s okay. I lost all respect for them when they started trying to kill me.”
“Oh no, I shot you! Here, have 20 credits!”
“…And I was just wondering what to do in this situation, you being our fearless leader and all.”
“You could’ve gotten there by 8:30, but your taxi driver would’ve had to kill three people to do it.”
“So…time to go hit on some random Swiss guys.”
“People are a little uptight about the government collapsing…”
“It’s the amazing adventures of Britney and Eloise—the bar-hopping arm of the Aeon Trinity.”
“Smoking pot with a random Swiss guy. The things I do for the Aeon Trinity.”
“…And then I go to bed, because I’m stoned.”
“Have him hide in the bathroom, so that if shit goes down…”
“…He can flush it.”
“Atrius?”
“Yes, ma’am?”
“Are you feeling rambunctious today?”
“I leave the bodies in the dumpster and declare it officially not my problem.”
“…And I go back to the store, and I kill the electronics guy…”
The Characters:
Atrius (aka Steve), a psychokinetic. Played by Mike.
Corazón (Cory) Salazar, an electrokinetic. Played by Beth.
Risha Marc, a psychokinetic. Played by Caly.
Storyteller: Andy.