I HAVE RISEN!
Phil spoke, back from the dead. Unbeknownst to our hero Andy, Phil was the prophesized Messiah of the chainsaws, and had risen from the dead more powerful than ever.
Andy picked up his holy friend, whose body began to glow with pure energy. Phil was a chainsaw no longer, truly he was now and forever more Phil...
THE LIGHTSAWBER!
Together, Andy and Phil's power dwarfed that of Ed Fisto, and rather than granting him the glory of rotting in Hell with his master, they bansished him to work for Microsoft for all eternity.
Thus it was that Andy earned all the Justice and pie he could ever want. He retired to Old Gringotville, Vermont where he built a world class Monorail system. Phil on the otherhand became a door to door salesman for pineapple flavored hamster chow.
THE END
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