| These 'ere are some of the best jokes you'll ever hear about blondes.......... Q. What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg? A. Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money. Q. How does a blonde part their hair? A. By doing the splits. Q. What did the blondes right leg say to the left leg? A. Nothing, they haven't met yet!! Q. Why do blondes wash thier hair in the sink? A. Because that's where your supposed to wash vegtables. Q. What's a blonde favorite nursery rhyme? A. Humpme Dumpme!!! Q. Why did the blonde like the car with a sunroof? A. More leg-room!! Q. Why don't blondes use vibrators? A. They chip their teeth!!!! |
| Every body knows the best men have a great collection of jokes and down the years I've heard some of the greatest ones you're ever likely to hear, so I decided I'd print 'em for you lot on here, but you should be warned some of them are a little bit out of order, if you know what I'm saying!!!!!! |
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| ''ere are some assorted jokes from my world of laughter; A man goes into the bedroom (where his wife is 'aving a rest) carrying an asperin, when 'is wife says to 'im 'why've you got an asperin' and the geeza replies ' it's for your headache' then the wife replies 'I haven't got a headache' the bloke replies 'Good.' A young man is preparing to bring his girlfriend home to introduce her to his mother, but before he says to his mum ' I'm going to bring home three girls and you have to guess which one's my girlfriend' he says. His mum agrees and the next day the son brings the three women over, and asks his mother 'well, which one do you think is my girlfriend then?' she replies 'the ginger one in the middle' her son replies 'that's amazing, how did you know' his mother replies one more time ' because I don't like her' Mary had a little lamb it's fleece was black as coal, and every time it jumped a fence you could see it's pink arsehole. A woman goes up to a library desk and says: ' I have a complaint' The library assitant says ' yes madam, may I help you' She replies 'I borrowed a book last week, it had too many characters and no plot' 'Ah yes' replied the librarien 'you must be the person who borrowed our phone book' How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex? Phone her and tell her. What's the difference between love and herpes? Love doesn't last forever. What did the two lesbian frogs say to each other? We do taste like chicken What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are you shaking, she's going to eat me!! Why do men die before their wives? because they want to Why is there dust on the moon? Because women haven't been there yet I married Miss Right, I just didn't know her first name was 'Always' How do you confuse a female archaeologist? Give her a used tampon and ask her which period it's from!!! |