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| QUOTES |
| "It might be good if you had a get out clause" - Graham Walters, a friend of the bands' on having powers of invisibility. "One I used was 'can I kiss you?'. She said 'you're very forward, but yes'. Bloody worked though!" - Graham Walters again, this time on the slimy chat up lines he uses to reel girls in like fish. "You don't know her address and phone number do you?" - A worryingly stalker-esque piece of dialogue apparently spoken by Peter during a discussion when he was in the sixth form at college. "It's just a heat rash" - Matt Fisher, another mutual friend of the band, on a strange skin condition that was afflicting him at the time. "You'd make a cracking doctor wouldn't you, telling everyone that" - Pete Muscutt to Graham Walters while Graham was flicking through a medical diagnosis book telling everyone they had AIDS. "Look what you done to my arm you bastard" - Jamie McClelland, yet another mutual friend, after Pete Muscutt had just given him a "birthday" punch on the arm. Obviously too hard for him, then. "Let's go and do crack or something" - Graham Walters after getting very bored in the school library during our time in the sixth form. "Toddler wanders into lorry on motorway" - A headline from a local newspaper in Devon called The Herald Express...and yes, it was real. "Don't touch the hair" - Simon Laughton, a very, very, very vain man indeed. "There's nothing good that can happen to you when you go out" - Wrestler, Stan Hansen. "Oh dear, someone's knob extension is ringing" - Peter Muscutt on the bane that is mobile phones. "If that goalkeeper comes out any further, he'll be George Michael" - A valid observation from Pete Muscutt during a school football match. "I want to be Anna Kournikova's flannel because she would wash herself all over with it" - Graham Walters, officially registered as a dirty prevert. "There was a great quote I heard today, but I'll be buggered if I can remember it" - Pete Muscutt unwittingly spawns a quote out of forgetfulness. "Basic Instinct - Bill's capsule review: PIECE OF SHIT" - (Now deceased) stand up comic, Bill Hicks "If you've seen one female naked, you've seen them all" - Graham Walters blinkered view of the fairer sex. "The precurser to any good funeral is death" - Presenter from Channel Five (unknown) "If I say fuck two more times, that's forty six fucks in this fucked up rhyme" - Hot Dog by Limp Bizkit. "Oxygen gets you high. In a catastrophic emergency you take giant panic breaths. You become euphoric, docile, you accept your fate" - Brad Pitt as Tyler Durden in Fight Club. "We've been banned because tyhe fucking parents over there think we're going to warp kids' minds" - Joey from Slipknot. Hmm, I wonder why they thought that? "It's been established that people who have recently died have been returning to life and committing murder" - News reporter in Night Of The Living Dead. "Take what you can for as long as you can get it" - Pete Muscutt "My mother...what's the phrase? She isn't quite herself today" - Anthony Perkins as Norman Bates in Psycho. "The only thing more terrifying than the first eighty minutes of 'Suspiria'...is the last ten" - Poster slogan for horror film 'Suspiria'. Bet the marketing department got the day off for that, then. "We are the artisans, not the architects" - Dr. Meyer in Holby City. "Yeah, with enough soap one can blow up just about anything" - Brad Pitt as Tyler Durden in Fight Club again. "I can't sleep or the clowns might get me" - Simon Laughton "To be compromising, even in the face of inexplicable neurosis, is a most compelling and lubricating experience" - Peter Muscutt "If you look closely, you can see the Devil's cock" - Pete Muscutt's mate Vince gets too involved in the architecture of Coventry Cathedral. "Speculation by definition is untrue" - Politician, Peter Mandelson "Nibbling isn't eating, it's fiddling" - Creme Egg poster campaign "You're my wife now!" - Reece Shearsmith as Papa Lazarou in BBC's The League Of Gentlemen. |
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