Sunday – we’ve been reading the Bali Forum for weeks and now we’re here.

We think we know what we want to see – where we want to go. Without this information we’d be in hot water!

Today is the day that Pieboy and Piegirl start to learn the language and meet people. By the time breakfast is over, we can Selamat Pagi and Minta kopi with the best of them!

The Mercure breakfast buffet does not disappoint. It is truly outstanding with tons of food which changes from day to day including – gasp – donuts(!) not to mention various foods which presumably appeal to tourists from another country because we saw them enthusiastically indulging in huge amounts! Maybe this explains the old Mental as Anything song ...

We meet Made Arsa the transfer man after breakfast – he was officially checking to see if everything was OK with the hotel but was also on a sales trip – he offers us a good deal on a tour that covers many of the areas we had on our list of “Things to see”. So we book for Thursday.

We soon set off to Discovery Mall. This is the day we become Germans. Germans? Ya mate. We don’t want or need a timeshare.

So Piegirl had a brilliant idea.

Piegirl developed the Nein Nein approach. She answered them in her high school German. Pieboy just kept tromping along saying things like Frankfurt Hamburg. Piegirl explained – in German – that we couldn’t speak English – that we were German. And the timeshare guys (and girls) didn’t have the foggiest idea what to do. One of them even accused us of being Russkie. “Nein, Deutsche” said Piegirl. It worked every time. Occasionally there would be mention of the world cup football and pennies would drop … “ah German!” they’d say. “Ya ya foossball … Deutsche” we’d say. And keep walking.

Worked every time except once! (You’ll have to keep reading to find out more ... )

Following the recommendations of people on this Forum, Pieboy wanted to buy some new glasses at Optik Melawi. And it is true what they say – they provide quick, professional and efficient optical service. And they are far, far cheaper than where I would go locally in Australia. Two pairs of reading glasses for about $180.00.

Piegirl’s friend recently became a mum, so she was pleased to find the Osh Kosh shop in the mall and had a lot of fun in there. Piegirl’s hundred dollars bought bought five times as much as it would in Myers.

At the beach end of Discovery Mall there are large stone seats – benches really – on a plaza overlooking the ocean. There really is only one problem with the stone benches. They have a slight design fault. They are not actually stone. They are moulded fibreglass (Piegirl reckons flimsy plastic). And they have rounded bases. And when a person sits on them – they roll and fall over. The sitter then hits the ground. The ground is real stone though, not fibreglass. And it hurts. Take care if you are all shopped out and want to rest!

Pieboy and Piegirl both enjoyed exploring Centro and got some well priced items of clothing for some smaller people at home ... we’ll be back ...

Off again in the afternoon – to JL Melasti and Garlic Lane. We looked, indeed, we tried, but it was early days and we did not leave anything that could be considered a substantial contribution to the Balinese economy.

Piegirl tried her hand at driving a fair bargain but she didn’t come close! For ten pieces of pretty basic crinkle cotton separates the seller wants 1.4 million and will not move. Our best price is half this. We start to walk away, fully expecting to be called back. We’re not. This worries the Piepersons a bit – so far there did not seem to be very much flexibility at all in the pricing – not at all like our previous experiences in Thailand. Never mind – we’ll keep trying.

We make our way to JL Legian where we find the Secret Garden Day Spa. Piegirl has been looking forward to this – Pieboy is watching with a little trepidation. We check their prices and make a booking for Monday afternoon.

The Pieboy and Piegirl head down JL Legian aiming for Poppies Lane. We don’t actually have a clear destination in mind and somehow we miss Poppies Lanes – both I and II – completely. It has been a long, long, long day and when we round the corner into Jl Raya Kuta and see and recognise the name Made’s Warung we realise how hungry and tired and thirsty we are.

Dinner was great. A chicken and a beef curry with lashings of rice and Diet Cokes for 70,000.

To the hotel and collapse.