by
Anaphalis
Summary: Sometimes you no longer know when to stop walking. Introspective/Angst. One Shot. Mayu --> Hatori.
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Disclaimer: Fruits Basket belongs to Natsuki Takaya/HAKUSENSHA - TV TOKYO - NAS - Fruba Project. Brushes on this page courtesy of Pure Anodyne.
A/N: Niamh's Gift One Shot. Because I am apparently an insomniac. And the writing shows it :)
A/N2: Using my favourite piano syllabus, musically speaking, Andante is a steady, measured walking pace.
She also hates marking, the awkward silence after an introduction, and black dogs. In no particular order.
Mayu spends a lot of time with things she hates.
But that is part of Mayu's secret- if you measure things out into small enough, steady enough doses you can bear almost anything. Unfortunately, no matter how small the pieces of food she puts into her mouth, she still doesn't like breakfast. It is then that she reminds herself that there are things that she hates more than breakfast, things that are harder to bear than early morning food.
Hatori, of course.
She doesn't hate Hatori, but he is much harder to bear than breakfast.
Strangely, taking in small, steady doses of him does not make him easier to bear either. Sometimes Mayu thinks that maybe her entire philosophy is completely wrong, but she tells herself that it is only the steady, measured paces that are getting her through the days.
Mayu is not a measured person. Keeping a steady pace is slowly, slowly killing her as she slowly, slowly moves- forwards, backwards, the direction doesn't matter anymore.
But, as she reminds herself every hated breakfast, it is worth it if it keeps her going, keeps the rage and life and pain from bursting out and exploding into the world around her.
Slowly, steadily, Mayu.
She reminds herself again when she sees him, reminds herself as she watches him talking to the woman that the black dog implied was his new relationship. Strangely, although it hurts, she is happier seeing this. She is that much closer to being able to move faster than her steady pace if he is truly happy and moving forward. If he can move forward then-
It is only after the woman leaves and she sees the brief flicker of desolation in his eyes, that she realizes that he might actually believe the words he told her, that he might actually believe that he can never be happy.
She watches him- the man who would remember what Kana couldn't wait to forget.
And Mayu walks on.
-End-
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