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1. What is a "visiting teacher"?
2. Who do you call "brother" and who do you call "elder"?
3. What makes "sister" a "sister" and not a missionary?
4. What is a "Young Woman"?
5. What is a "branch", a "ward", a "stake"?
6. What is "stake conference" and why do we have it?
7. Why did my husband who did not join end up on "Elders’ quorum"?
8. "Mutual" what?
9. The church building is confusing.  Where are the rest rooms?  Why aren’t there signs on the classrooms?
10. You can borrow a set of scriptures from the library until you are able to get your own.
11. Church magazines?  Where do I order them?
12. What is appropriate dress for church?
13. How and to whom do I pay tithing?  What are the other categories on the slip?  Do I donate there, too?
14. What is "tithing settlement" and what is the purpose?
15. A year’s supply of what?  And store it where?
16. What is "Family Home Evening"?
17. What is "Primary"?
18. Why do we say "amen" out loud?
19. What is a "home teacher"?
20. Ancestors how many generations back?  Do what with the names?  Do what for the dead?

 "Mormon - isms"

My son’s a CTR. . .I go to PEC.
I work for CES. . .I study the TG.
I read the B of M. . .I probe the D & C.
I search the KJV. . .and research the JST.
Today at BYC we planned for EFY.
I stayed a little after and had a PPI.
The AP and YW are putting on a play.
It’s one that I remember. . .we did in MIA.
Next month is our Stake conference. . .
We’re having a GA.
Before our eldest son went into the MTC,
He helped the BSA complete their SME.
Soon our eldest daughter is heading for the "Y".
Then her oldest clothing is going to DI
Students go to institute to learn the B of M.
I think our daughter goes there to find a nice RM.
Now, if you’ve understood this alphabetic mess,
The evidence is pretty good that you are LDS.
 
 

 For Converts and Those New to the Area

See that each new sister

1. Has a Ward list.
2. Knows who the Bishopric is and how they function.
3. Has a list of the RS presidency.
4. Knows who her visiting teacher and home teacher is and has phone numbers.
5. Knows where the genealogy library is.
6. Knows where the Visitors’ Center is.
7. Knows that videos are available from the Church library to learn teachings and history of the church.
8. Has a current RS manual.
9. Knows about the church magazines available and how to order them.
10. Knows what and how to order other church publications: hymn book, Family Home evening manuals, storybooks.  Give address and directions to the LDS book store.
11. Knows official church web site www.lds.org and church news site www.ldschurchnews.com
12. A welcome from the bishopric.