After a Christmas break, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holidays. One small boy wrote the following:
We always used to spend Christmas with Grandpa and Grandma. They used to live here in a big brick home, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Florida. Now they live in a place with a lot of other retarded people. They all live in little tin boxes. They ride on big three-wheeled tricycles and they all wear nametags because they don't know who they are. They go to a big building called a wrecking hall; but if it was wrecked, they got it fixed because it's all right now. They play games and do exercises there, but they don't do them very good.
There is a swimming pool there. They go into it and just stand there with their hats on. I guess they don't know how to swim.
As you go into their park, there is a dollhouse with a little man sitting in it. He watches all day so they can't get out without him seeing them. When they can sneak out they go to the beach and pick up shells that they think are dollars.
My Grandma used to bake cookies and stuff, but I guess she forgot how. Nobody cooks, they just eat out. They eat the same thing every night, Early Birds. Some of the people are so retarded that they don't know how to cook at all, so my Grandma and Grandpa bring food into the wrecked hall and they call it "pot luck."
My Grandma says Grandpa worked hard all his life and earned his retardment. I wish they would move back up here, but I guess the little man in the dollhouse won't let them out.
A man escaped jail by digging a hole from his jail cell to the outside world. When finally his work was done, he emerged in the middle of a preschool playground.
"I'm free, I'm free!" he shouted.
"So what," said a little girl. "I'm four."
Pranks
Put tape on the back of the sprayer on the sink! When someone turns the sink on, they will be sprayed!
Put butter on the toilet seat!
Unscrew the shower head and pour some paks of kool aid in it.
If you have that mat thing in your bathtub, put kool aid there
Get a woopie cousion, and put it under the couch matress!
While someone is sleeping, put wipcream in there hand and tickle there face! They will get wipcream all over there face!
Put dye in the shampoo bottle! The dye should be the same colour as the shampoo. You will probably get a alot of trouble!
Put something squshy in someones shoe, and watch them scream!
Have a sleep-over party, and when they all are asleep, get a washable marker, and draw stuff all over there faces!
Do you want to trick someone into telling you the people they have a crush on? than
click here!
Ask someone to take the "Kid test"
Tell who ever your giving the test to, that all the answers are connected, and think childish, and dumb.
How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Tell them there is no freezer.
Answer: you stuff it in.
How do you put a elephant in the refrigerator? Answer: you take out the giraffe, and stuff it in.
All the animals were invited to a party. Will all of them be there? Answer: The elephant wont be there. He is in the fridge.
To get to this party, you need to cross a river, and everyone knows there are alligators in it. How do you get across? Answer: you walk across, the alligators went to the party.