| Ted digs to China ... or wherever is straight down from Denmark |
| Ted doesn't know his geography, but he knows how to dig to the other side of the planet. |
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| Teddy remains hopeful that his laborious efforts of digging in the flower bed will take him to China soon. Marlowe, however, is convinced the angle of the hole will lead to nowhere, eventually. �You dig a hole deep enough and you get to China; everyone knows that,� said Ted emphatically as chunks of dirt flew from his paws. Marlowe protested that it�s all a matter of geography. For example, when the cats lived in California, a hole would have led to China. However, now that they live in Denmark, the rules change. �We live and Denmark, and nowhere is where you are going,� he said. The geography question has sparked quite a debate, and the cats have turned to a globe for confirmation of where the hole may lead, although dirty pawprints smeared on it have muddied the issue. To prove his point, Marlowe stood in front of the globe and pput his left paw on California and his right paw directly on the either side, which happened to be the east coast of China on the Ynagtze River. �See, a hole straight down leads to China,� he said. By comparison, he found Denmark with the point of his right claw and reached around the globe. Directly on the other side was a bunch of blue. �Hmmm, water. See, it leads to nowhere.� �I see a brown speck there,� observed Teddy. �I bet it�s China.� �Doofus, China is big. That speck is �� Marlowe bent closer ��that speck is a bit of dirt.� But there was something else on the globe � a cluster of dots by the Aleutian Islands off the southwest tip of Alaska more or less near the Kodiak region. The cluster were tiny islands called the Rat Islands. �Oh, this is encouraging,� said Edgar, who is the best hunter of the trio. �The Rat Islands?� said Teddy. �Yeppers. It looks like if you keep digging, you�ll hit the island of Kiska. The best part is it�s a US territory, so we won�t even need to show our passports,� Edgar said. Marlowe is anxious to get there by spring. However, the diameter of the Earth is 12,753 kilometers, or 7,929 miles or 41.865 million feet. If Teddy digs one foot each day, it will take 114 years and seven months. Since the math was done, Teddy has been discouraged and is averaging about two inches a day. Last Wednesday, Monie became a copycat and started digging a hole close by Teddy�s excavation. With a determined look, she announced, �I am digging to Kina. Everyone knows all holes lead to Kina!" |
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| "You are going nowhere fast," observes Marlowe |