Unendlichkeitssehnsucht
My mom had finally decided that I was old enough to take an art class where there were nude models. Perhaps some of it had to do with the fact that I could have taken the class anyway, but I had pandered to the idea that she still exerted some control over my life. I still lived at home anyway, and she was paying for it. But I think I figured out the real reason when I looked in one of my dresser drawers and found my sketches of stuff that wasn�t exactly appropriate for displaying on the wall all messed up. I guess I was lucky that she didn�t kick me out instead.So I found myself heading to a small and shoddy little white painted brick building with no air-conditioning when I could have been...well, not like there would have been much difference if I was at home. Some part of me was anxious to see who I would have to draw. Would it be an old man with a really hairy back? Or maybe a really hot woman? All this anxiety was turning me on a bit.
There were about ten other people in the class, I guessed that the fees were enough to justify a small class size...or maybe it was just that the models had already been paid in advance and the teacher didn�t want to pay them out of her own pocket. I knew no one, and no one seemed to be around my age. Actually, it was scary how many people looked just like suburban housewives. Some part of me denied older people any sex drive at all. I though that they were just here to see how younger flesh looked, to get a glimpse at their past and reminisce.
�Okay, we�re just going to be sketching today so that I can see what kind of skills you guys have.� the teacher said, beaming and almost bouncing up and down in enthusiasm. She was sort of young and idealistic. Sort of like I would be if I wasn�t smarter than that. �Now remember that we need to be mature about this.� she said, looking pointedly at me. Just because I was younger than everyone else didn�t mean that I was going to giggle or do anything immature. I put on my best face and nodded along with everyone else. �I�ll just go and get our model then.�
I stared at my easel and bit down on my cheeks in preparation. I didn�t think that I would laugh, but I had a tendency to blush and make sniggering noises. I had enough lingering respect for the teacher that I wanted to try and present myself as a mature individual. Didn�t want to ruin it for the other teenagers who might want to take it.
Then I saw pure beauty and my teeth almost went right through my cheeks.
He was listening to what the teacher was saying, but his eyes strayed to me. My eyes would not leave his face except to note that he was wearing a green robe and his legs were so long and it was knotted right above his... I tried to breathe in as slowly as possible, valiantly keeping hormones at bay. His hair was sort of short, almost black, and spiked in two places, his eyes brown and deep, lips full and...he licked at them, leaving a sheen of saliva. I crossed my legs. His eyes went to me for a moment and he smirked. Then the teacher was moving away and his hands went to the knot and oh my gods I was going to see him naked and and....
He peeled it off slowly and seductively while looking at me. I looked to the teacher and all the other members of the class to see if they saw it too, but they were acting like it was normal. I looked back at him and he was just taking it off, there was no seduction involved. I tried to maintain a focus on his face, but my eyes were drawn to his shoulders, a tattoo that I couldn�t make out on his left, a tattoo on his right bicep, one gracing his forearm. But looking at his forearm meant looking elsewhere and... Slammed my eyes shut.
He went and laid down on the platform and then temptation was halfway gone. He laid his head down on his arms and looked at me again. There was something in his eyes that I wasn�t quite comfortable with, but at the moment it was all that I could do to keep from touching myself. Nobody else seemed to be having a problem. They were all just looking and sketching. I tried to reach for the pencil and draw something, but my eyes kept on being drawn to the way that his back dipped down and then the swell of his ass. Sweat burst out on my forehead and my hand shakily approached the paper. And it didn�t help that he was looking at me and smiling.
�Ryan, isn�t it? Are you having problems getting started?� the teacher asked, laying a reassuring hand on my shoulder. Except at that point it made me jump and my legs uncross and him laugh to himself.
�Um...just a little.� I whispered.
She smiled. �I understand.� Then she took my hand with the pencil gently and helped me start a line. �Just go with the flow, notice how the musculature...� her words faded out as I stared at him. What was his name? How old was he? Was this what he did all the time? Why did he keep on staring at me? I had read the description, models weren�t supposed to take off their robes erotically, they weren�t supposed to look at the members of the class, and they certainly weren�t supposed to mouth words. His lips parted and his tongue went out to jab at me.
My cock was starting to hurt and all I had on the paper was one line. This wasn�t going to work out, I could tell that already. If I focused on his face, he would start looking at me and trying to get a rise out of me, if I looked at his body...winced as my jeans got almost too tight to bear. Finally I decided to just sketch his hand. That would be enough for today, and the teacher couldn�t say that I wasn�t working. Then he would be gone and I�d never see him again.
But his hands were compelling too. I ended up just staring at them, at the lingering traces of...nail polish? Looked up at his face again, makeup there too. Then he winked at me and nodded to the side. I couldn�t deal with this, really I couldn�t.
Got up and ran to the bathroom, put my head against the sink and breathed loudly. Fuck, I was going to explode if I stayed in there any longer. All I could think of was him licking every inch of my body, me exploring all of his, all of his that I had seen and adored and... Found my cock out and in my hand. No...I was stronger than this, truly I was. But my hand kept on massaging it, little spikes of pleasure that soon were driving me insane. Wanted to pretend that his mouth was over it, kissing down the length, swallowing it whole. I didn�t even know his name, I couldn�t be fantasizing about him. This was wrong...this was so wrong. Dirty. Slammed my head into the wall as I came in my hand. I licked the semen off slowly, imagining that his lips were encasing my fingers, touching my neck and nibbling at my pulse.Cold water. Submerged my face in it, wanted to submerge my entire body in something that wouldn�t turn me on beyond belief. It took about ten minutes for me to calm down sufficiently to be able to walk back to class without looking like I was constipated. I glanced at my watch, shit! There wasn�t that long until I had to go home and my mom would pick me up in the parking lot.
When I returned to class everyone had little sketches except for me. I just had one line and a trailing rambling line where I had tried to outline his hand but had failed miserably. The teacher looked up at me and smiled indulgently. He winked. Twice. Then stuck the tip of one of his fingers in his mouth and licked it. A little whimper escaped my throat, soon to be covered up by my hand.
I slid back into my seat and finished a very crappy sketch of his hand, turned it in to the teacher, and watched her look at me. �I know it�s hard the first few times, but soon you�ll get used to the human body.� she said, smiling at me. �I have faith that you can handle this. Maybe you�ll be able to get more done tomorrow. We�ll be using the same model.�
Went out in the hallway to wait for my mom. I had my driver�s license, it was just that there was only one car and she had to use it to get to work. Which reminded me, I had work today too...�So, you�re interested in art?� a deep voice asked behind me. Liquid sex floating on corrosive air.
�Um...a bit... I just like drawing.� I said. Didn�t dare look at him. But he walked forward and I couldn�t help it. He looked so different with clothes on. Blush crept up my face. White mesh shirt underneath a T- shirt concealed his chest, his nipples. Almost moaned thinking about them. Then...black jeans over...eyes closed slowly. I didn�t want to get like this.
His hand stuck out. �I�m Jay.� he said.
�Ryan.� I shook his. �Um...do you do this for a living?�
He smiled and shook his head. �It doesn�t pay that well. How old are you?�
�I..I don�t know if I should tell you that.�
�Well, we�re going to be seeing each other for most of this week. Might as well get to know each other. Since we have a bit of an understanding.� His hand went right to my crotch and gently massaged my cock for a moment. Eyes brown and full of a small spark of lust. Then he was walking away and I was slumping down the side of the building.
My mom honked the horn and I ran to the car. �Is that someone in your class?� she asked.
�Yeah, sort of.� I said, keeping my hands in my lap.
�So, was it a hot girl who was the model today?� she asked, smiling coyly at me.
�Um..it was a hot...dog. We did still-lifes today.�
�Dearest, it�s okay if you don�t want to tell me about it. I know how I was at your age!� she said, slapping my thigh. I closed my eyes and tried to forget that I�d have to see him every day this week. I didn�t know if I could restrain myself.