Beware Of Trains:

Mexico City, Mexico

Flora Sanchez wound up in the hospital despite her efforts to be careful at the train crossing near her home in Mexico City.

As she attempted to cross, the girl carefully looked both the ways- and was hit on the head by a large metal sign warning " Beware of Trains".

Growing Problem:

Florida

Florida readers may be interested to know that unmarried woman found parachuting on Sundays are subject to arrest and imprisonment.

'Thank goodness somebody is doing something about this growing problem', says one local resident.

Stampeding pigs kill animal right workers:

Munich, Germany

The city has been abuzz about a neighboring pigs incident. It seems that two animal protesters broke in to a slaughterhouse to free thousands of pigs before they met their fate. Armed with bolt cutters, they managed to clear the way for the soon to be liberated pigs. As the doors opened, a stampede of pork rushed through the opening, trampling the crusading protesters and crushing them to their doom.

When Jesus returns for the second coming:

Palm Springs- Florida

When Jesus returns for the second coming, he will have enough money for a sports car and a condo in Palm Springs. Mr. Ernest Digweed died sixteen years ago and left his entire estate to Jesus Christ. He instructed his state trustee office to invest his money in Government bonds, guaranteeing Jesus a total yield of $615,820 by the end of the Century. Digweed�s heirs are contesting the will, and have offered an unusual solution: An insurance policy in the same amount payable to Jesus upon his return.

Since then another problem has cropped up. Two individuals, each insisting that he is Jesus reborn, have filed claims for the money!

He leaves child with Police, Goes on vacation:

London

British police said that social service and other authorities would investigate whether any action should be taken against the man who left his 18-month-old daughter at a police station in Leeds, saying he was going on vacation,. The child was reunited with its grand parents within the hour and was fit and well. Media reports say that the man had gone on holiday to Spain.

Suspect forgets cell phone on and tells police her cover story:

The associate press:(8/13/02) Pennsylvania

Her cell phone may end up doing her in. A Pennsylvania woman will stand trial this week on charges she stabbed her husband on the chest- and then tried to make up a story to hide the assault.

But local emergency dispatchers say they heard Linda Glenn attempt to concoct the tale. It turns out that after she called them for help- she forgot to turn off her cell phone. So the dispatchers say they listened as Glenn told her husband she was afraid she would go to jail if he died. The couple is then heard discussing a story to cover up the crime. Richard Glenn survived the stabbing. His wife faces attempted homicide and aggravated assault charges.

You could go to jail for saying Bad Words-Too Bad nobody is saying what they are:

By the associated press, (7/5/02, Mexico)

A city in western Mexico has banned swearing in public, slapping fines up to $400 or 36 hours jail term for uttering 'bad words.'

City council in Zapopan with 1.2 million inhabitants approved the law and already the residents are wondering what it means. The law doesn�t define Bad words, leaving it up to police which utterances are against 'Moral and good customs'.

A 17-year old Pedro Martinez said he always swears when he plays soccer. 'I do it without realizing it', he said, 'it�s just for fun. We don�t insult one another in anger, just playfully.'

Martinez�s mother, Rosario Martinez, said if the law were enforced, she would end up paying fine everyday for her son�s outbursts. But she said she wouldn�t punish him, because she swears as well. 'That�s how we Mexicans are', she said.

New Car Accessory?

Redondo Beach- California,

After a short chase, officer Joseph Fonteno charged the driver of the white Mazda with DUI. The car had been driving down pacific coast highway with the upper half a traffic light pole lying across its hood. When Fonteno asked the drunken driver about the pole, he responded: ' It came with the car when I bought it.'

Doctor Left surgery patient to visit Bank:

CAMBRIDGE, Mass- Reuters,

A Massachusetts doctor has been suspended for leaving a patient on the operating table midway through spinal surgery, so he could deposit a check at his local bank, authorities said. The state board of medicine said David Arndt, an orthopedic surgeon, posed an immediate threat to public health, safty and welfare after he left the patient last month with an open incision in his back. Arndt left behind a surgeon who was not qualified to complete the surgery, according to board documents. After his 35 minutes trip to the bank, Arndt returned to the operating room and finished the surgery within a few hours.

The patient, who was anesthetized during the process, apparently did not suffer any harm from Arndt�s absence and was able to recover in the intensive care unit of Mount Auburn Hospital.

The board suspended Arndt�s license to practice medicine, but he will have a chance to appeal the decision.

Zealot loses to gravity:

Jakarta, Indonesia.

A Man charged with murder thought he could beat the rap by taking advantage of a legal loophole. Apparently, police are not allowed to arrest someone who is in the midst of practicing a religious ritual. So he began to stand on his head, which is a ritual practiced by a local cult. After days of being upside down, he surrendered to authorities complaining of numb feet.

I just have to be a Police officer:

Boynton Beach, Florida

Kevin Carter, 21 and Michael Harrison 26, were charged with second-degree murder, attempted murder, and an armed robbery at a jewelry store in Boynton Beach, Florida. The men reportedly planned the job because they needed $2500 so they could pay the tuition at the Palm Beach community College Police Academy.

He, actually said, ' I guess I can�t become a police officer now,' Detective Ray Schilke said after interviewing Carter.

Injured man can�t Bank on Hospital:

NAIROBI, KENYA (Reuters)

A businessman was carried into a bank on a stretcher to withdraw cash after a hospital refused to treat him because he could not pay his bill, Newspaper reported. The East African Standard said Wilson Owuor had been badly beaten by thugs and taken for treatment by friends, but the hospital refused to admit him because he carried no money.

Undaunted, his friends loaded him onto a stretcher and carried him to the Kenya Commercial Bank branch at Siaya, so that he could withdraw money.

The Paper said, the sight of four men carrying a man in a stretcher into the bank caused a security scare and paralyzed bank business. Unfortunately, Owuor had also forgotten to bring his bankcard in his rush to seek treatment so the bank would not release any money, the newspaper said.

To be continued..