My Poetry
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The OLD Stuff....

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On the Lawn

As I sit in your arms, you seem so far away.
How empty is your kiss today, baby?
We are both tired of eachother in different ways.
How empty is your smile today, baby?

I can't help but cry in your blanket.
How empty are my tears, baby?
The song on the radio makes me think.
How empty is my heart now, baby?

We don't know what the future holds.
Will you be empty too, baby?
All we have is the rest of this ride.
Drive till the gas tank's empty, baby.

As I watch you walk down the sidewalk,
you seem so far away.
We are both without eachother and sad in
different ways.
How empty is my life if yours is empty, too?
How empty is tomorrow when we're through?

ME

I am the girl who feels
The one who sees the obvious
Tired of being bored but too bored to care.

I am the girl who fights.
The one who punches the cheerleader.
tired of fighting the internal battles that bind.

I am the girl who forgets.
The one who can't keep track of today.
Tired of waking up to remember.

I am the girl who falls.
The one who daydreams of him.
Tired of loving the loveless.

I am the girl who flies.
The one who lifts above this earth.
Tired of being so tired all the time.

Silly little boy
all wrapped up in death
Silly little girl
all out of breath
Silly little world
we dwell in today.
Silly little life
that's taken away.

-No More Jinx-

For what it's worth,
I never wanted to leave.
Never wanted to be out in
the remainder again.

**DON'T**

Don't look at me.
I can't bear the thought of you,
with someone else.
Don't look at me.
I can't become a friend this time.

Too many days, and too many nights
when I held you, and spoke words
of empty passion in your ear.
Wishing to say what I really felt.

Don't talk to me.
I can't bear hearing your voice
this time.
Don't talk to me.
And play it off once again like
everything's fine.

Too many tears and smiles when I
swore I'd never go back. then I
lay there waiting for your caress.
Dizzy with thoughts of "love"

Childhood

I lost touch w/ simplicity
a long time ago.
Way back where my
inner child grows.
If only for one day
out of my life.
I could get rid of the
pain, doubt, and strife.
To be 2, 3, or
4 once again.
Would make my dark soul
start to mend.

Untitled

I'll send it all away
I'll send it all away
If love was lost
I know the cost
I'll send it all away

I won't deny
the things I've tried
I'll make you cry
and let you die

I can make you pay

If love was true
I've followed through
Your rent is due
I hate you, too.

I can make you pay

The only words I know
And I can make it so
If only you would go
My hatred wouldn't show.

*My favorite old poem*

You are my heroin.
My soul's addiction.
I want to feel the sting of you.
Feel you corsing through my veins.
The dizzy high in your kiss of dust.
Angel's dust so soft and cruel.
Your crystal eyes burn through mine like the meth that they hide.
You are my drug.
My soul's addiction.
I'm left to die.
OD'd on your touch.
Then strung out again when you leave.
The shell of a person I used to be.
And I can't dry out cause you've sucked me in.
I drink your Southern Comfort and pray that it's enough.
You're what I love.
My soul's addiction.
And it's not my fault.
I've been since birth,
a crying, shaking baby, perged of you.
You are my end, my soul's affliction.

Untitled

Licking my palms.
Crying like a baby.
Stuck on a feeling.
And oh how sick I am.
Of this feeling. Of my
ways. I wanna change.
I wanna change.

Dye my hair and my heart.
Black, so no one else sees
through. Talk only to
myself. Stare blankly into
the future. Then nothing
gets out, and nothing
gets in. Beautiful emptiness.
Swallow it down. Continue....