‘Welcome to Capeside Massachusetts’ the sign read as we drove past it, I was more than happy to see it after the long trip. The view out the window I had to say was rather beautiful, it was right near the water and the willow trees hanging into the water were framing it, perfectly. Sailing boats could be seen floating on the water, moving about in the early morning breeze. The sun had only risen a few hours ago, but it looked like this town had never slept, everyone was up and about as we drove down the main street. Past the butcher shop, music store and post office on the corner. If they were back in California everyone would be a sleep at this time in the morning or lazy about for a Saturday morning in summer. We turned off the main street and headed along the road following the river, not passing many houses on the way, the odd one or two, until we came to a row of three houses along the edge of the river. Two were close, but still had a lot of room between them and the other was a bit further down the road. They stopped in front of the first one.
“We’re here!” my mother announced proudly as she got out of the car to inspect the house fully. I leant forward in the car and looked out the front wide screen. It was a one-store house that looked more like a beach house then a house house, if you know what I mean, but it looked live able and that’s what mattered. My mother disappeared inside as I climbed out of the car and got my first taste of the salty smell in the air. The house next door looked much the same and from where he was standing he could see a swing in the yard that told him children lived next door.
Shortly after he stopped the swing the front door of the house opened and a tall-legged girl that looked around his aged walked down the steps, a bucket of soapy water in one hand and a scrubbing brush in the other. Her dark hair was pulled back into a loose bun. She dropped the bucket to her bare feet and dipped the scrubbing brush into the water and began to wash the blue truck that was parked in their driveway. Pacey couldn’t stop himself from staring at her, the short shorts and tank top she was wearing was making it impossible for him not to stare as she moved around the car. After realising that his mother could come out at any minute and see him, he decided it was now or never to walk over and introduce himself to the new neighbours.
He had got to the dividing gate, his hand just about to turn the latch and disturb the girls’ presence when a little boy still dressed in his pyjamas that looked not older than Ben, coming racing out of the house and aeroplane in one hand and his arms flapping widely.
“Alex, get back inside before you wake up all the neighbours!” The mother of the small child yelled from the inside of the house as she appeared in the open doorway, hands on her hips not looking at all pleased. Alex had stopped moving when he came in contact with the girls’ leg, hiding way from his mother, the girl laughed when she saw the woman.
“Bessie calm down, will you. The place is officially empty of tourists for the rest of the summer!” The girl explained from her side of the car as Bessie came down the front steps signing to herself.
“I know, I know but-” Bessie couldn’t finish her sentence as the girl interrupted her as she continued scrubbing the truck again.
“No buts, ok. You said you wanted time off with no responsibility, right?”
“Well yeah-” Alex’s hand poked around the girls’ leg looking over at his mother.
“Well I’m giving it to you, I can take care of Alex out here and I’ll make sure he gets dressed before the end of the day!” Bessie signed again looking over at the girl.
“He’s not going to bother you his he, coz I could always-”
“Bessie shut up and go put your feet up inside!” The girl sternly smirked.
“Thanks Joey, you do know that I’m going to have to repay you some how” Bessie finally gave in smiling.
“I don’t need repaying I love spending time with Alex as long as I get some sleep!” Joey laughed as she looked down at Alex that was still attached to her leg.
“Whatever you want Jo, Alex be good for your aunty today while mummy rests inside ok!” Bessie said bending a fraction while she spoke towards Alex.
“Yes mummy!” His thumb went straight to his mouth when she turned around and headed back inside.
“You are wicked Alex!” Joey said looking down at Alex again as he unlatched himself from her.
“No I’m not!” He sternly, his angry face turned to confusion shortly after, “What’s wicked mean?” Joey just laughed and went back to washing the truck.
Pacey still had his hand glued to the gate unnoticed by anyone through the whole exchange that just took place. It reminded him of Ben back home, always wanting to be around him when ever he could, the thousands of sleepover he would have in Ben’s room couldn’t be counted on two hands. He smiled as he lifted the latch and squeaking the gate open, catching Joey and Alex’s attention, which looked up in surprise at the new stranger in their yard. Joey dropped the scrubbing brush into the back of the truck with a smile.
“Hey, can I help you with something!” Joey came round the side of the truck wiping her soapy hands on her shorts, stepping closer to Pacey. Pacey took a few steps forward debating on what to say to her.
“You might be able to, you see my mother and I just moved in next door and she was wandering if she could borrow a cup of sugar she’s fresh out!” Pacey grinned at his lame excuse for conversation.
“How old are you?” Joey was defiantly amused by the question, as she was on the verge of smiling.
“Why do you ask? ” Pacey questioned looking at her straight.
“I find it hard to believe that a guy much like yourself, would actually want a cup of sugar from the girl next door!” Joey stared back, challenging him to speak.
“I don’t understand?” confusion crossed Pacey’s face as he took another step forward, Joey stepped back.
“Drop the act, I can see right through you!”
“Excuse me?”
“The lame pick up line, I’m not stupid, I know a line when I hear one!” Joey’s hands find their way to her hips as she glared towards Pacey.
“I never said you were stupid!” Pacey’s eyes widen as he watched how much he had upset her.
“But you did intent to sleep with me?” Joey raised an eyebrow at his mere silence.
“I don’t even know you, why would I want to sleep with you?” Pacey looked utterly confused, this girl has some serious problems to deal with he thought to him self.
“You wouldn’t be the first!” Joey started to turn around looking for Alex, who was still by the truck playing with his aeroplane.
“Look I’m just going to go now, sorry to bother you!” Pacey turned and headed back to the gate, “Maybe I’ll come back later when you are less-”
“Wait,” Joey reached out and pulled him to a stop by his arm, “I’m the one should be sorry. I snapped unnecessary at you!”
“You think?” Pacey turned and face her again.
“I’m trying to apologize here,” they grinned at each other, “I just broke up with my boyfriend last week, he dumped me after he got what he wanted and I’m just a bit jumpy around new guys!”
“No need to explain I understand; I was just trying to introduce myself being new in town and all!” Pacey shrugged looking around a bit.
“Joey Potter!” Joey stuck out her hand Pacey accepted it.
“Pacey Witter!”
“Looks like we are going to be neighbours for a while, Pacey” Joey dropped her hand as Pacey silently shrugged again, “Do you still go to school?”
“Yeah, senior year for me, you?”
“Same, um would you like to help me clean the truck?” She looked around again, gesturing with her hands towards it.
“Only if you want it, coz I wouldn’t want you thinking I was coming onto you or anything!” Pacey joked as they walked to the truck together.
“Pacey shut up, Alex this is Pacey from next door, Pacey this is Alex my nephew!” Joey walked around Alex to grab the scrubbing brush.
“Pacey is a stupid name!” Alex said in disgust.
“Alex!” Joey said in horror. Pacey laughed and kneeled so he was level with Alex.
“I think it’s a stupid name as well, but I’m stuck with it!” Alex giggled but it was muffled behind his thumb in his mouth, “how old are you Alex?”
“5, how old are you?” Alex took his thumb out of his mouth to show that he was five with his fingers.
“17, my nephew Ben is 5 as well!” Pacey smiled and looked up at Joey who was watching intently, but turned back to her work when she knew she had been caught watching, “When he comes down next week I’ll have to introduce you to him, ok?”
“Yeah!” Alex giggled happily; Pacey laughed again, “Can you come play Pacey?”
“If Joey doesn’t mind!” Pacey asked looking over at Joey as she stopped cleaning to car to look at them, Alex had this puppy dog look on his face and Pacey was grinning from ear to ear.
“Go play you too!” Joey signed, as Alex ran off, as Pacey got up to stand.
“I’ll be right back, don’t go anywhere!” Pacey said before dashing off after Alex. Joey laughed as she continued to scrub the car, every so often looking up as Pacey attempted to catch Alex but let him get away every time.
The last week of Joey’s life had been hell; she had done everything in her power not to think about Dawson but nothing seemed to help. She would do chores around the house without being asked to and help baby-sit Alex whenever Bessie needed it, just so that she wouldn’t have to think about how stupid she had been to trust anyone. But at the end of the day, when she covered in baby spit she would go back to her room and as soon as she closed that door behind her, everything would come back to her in full force. She just couldn’t escape him and that made sleeping so much harder, because every time she closed her eyes, she would see his face laughing at her and she would just burst into tries, that wouldn’t stop until she was asleep.
Pacey stopped running for a moment to catch his breath, as Alex continued to run around giggling to him self. He was bent over hands resting just above his knees, still breathing heavily when he stopped Joey, resting against the truck staring into space, in her own little world.
You know that person that sends a smile to your lips just by looking at them, that sends a shiver down your spine every time you stand near them. It’s that person that you can tell just by looking at them that you want to grow old with them. I found that person in Joey in that moment, but I wasn’t about to tell her that.
Pacey stood up properly with a smile, wiping the sweat that had formed on his forehead from chasing Alex around, with the back of his hand. His hands on his hips, he walked over to Joey and stood beside her and followed her gaze to the house at the end of the street. The house was big and white as it shone in the sun. A ladder leant against one side that Pacey thought was kind of strange, as the house didn’t look like it needed a paint job, but none the less it was there.
“All time favourite movie and why?” it came out of no way; the silence between them was broken.
“Might Ducks because I like ice hockey; you?”
“Notting Hill, it’s romantic; All time friend and why?” Joey asked, even though her eyes were still glued to the house down the road, she could tell Pacey was glancing over at her every so often which made her break out into a smile that she couldn’t contain.
“My nephew Ben, we have the best fun ever together. We would go on these pretend adventures in my sister’s backyard every summer.” Pacey drifted off sadly.
“You miss him?” Joey finally tore her eyes away from the house and looked across at Pacey, before turning her whole body away from the house, to Alex playing now by himself.
“You could say that, yes!” Pacey shrugged and turned as well so there shoulders were touching. Joey just nodded looking at her hands; all the words she wanted to say had disappeared.
“Pacey!” The distant voice of his mother made Pacey groan, “Pacey where are?” it came again and Joey laughed at his reaction.
“Your laughing at me aren’t you?” Pacey narrowed his eyes at her in mock anger.
“Maybe!” Joey smiled widely.
“I’ll just go then!” Pacey nudged her shoulder before walking away, leaving her to watch him go and she bit her lower lip.
* * * * * *
The plate dropping in front of me the sound it made; made me jump back a bit. Dinner was never my favourite meal because it was never anything eatable, so I wasn’t that surprised when all that was on my plate was a near charcoal piece of chicken and a handful of peas and carrots that looked like they had been there a week. I couldn’t really blame my mother, she had never been able to cook, and we usually had the T.v dinners you buy from the supermarket. I smiled at her all the same as she sat across from me at the tiny table in the kitchen; she smiled back.
“Eat up Pace!” She said when I hadn’t even picked up my fork. I did as I was told, taking my time to eat, as there was no flavour to it at all. We sat in complete silence until we finished, for two reasons really. One I didn’t have anything to say to her and two, I was exhausted from all the manual labour she had made me do since I had seen Joey this morning. My whole body was in need of a long hot relaxing shower but I knew I wasn’t going to get that anytime soon, as the water wasn’t getting connected until tomorrow, so I would have to just wait.
“Where did you go this morning after we arrived, I couldn’t find you anywhere inside?” I knew my mother was only curious, so I stared intently at my empty plate.
“Talking to the neighbours next door,” I didn’t look up afraid that if I looked up I’d give something away and I would have 20 questions fired at me in a matter of minutes.
“And?” She stood and collected the plates before heading to the sink.
“And they are nice people!” I shrugged I wasn’t in the mood for talking.
“Anyone your age?” she turned the hot water tap on to fill the sink, I had my back towards her but I knew I was right.
I waited until the tap was turned off again before answering her, “a girl!”
“What’s her name?” My mother’s voice was quiet as she spoke, curious but not interested as such.
“Joey, she has an older sister and her nephew living with her. She’s in her final year of school and just broke up with her boyfriend, anything else you want to ask me before I leave the room!” I stood looking across at her surprised expression; we never did talk much when we were in California. She always talked to Carrie or Gretchen, distant towards Doug or me, it was the way it was, and we were fine with it, but everything was changing now and I still had nothing to say to her.
“No Pacey, you can go!” She looked hurt as she turned back to the dishes. I silently left the room and headed outside through the sliding door. The sun had almost set over the creek, and the temperature had dropped a couple of degrees but it was still going to be a warm evening. I walked down the steps as I saw a figure sitting at the end of the dock at the waters edge.
I got to the beginning of the dock and saw the figure was in fact bent over, like she was crying. I took a step forward and she sat up straight as she heard the dock creak under my feet and she turned her head to see me, smiling she wiped the tears away with her hand, “Pacey what are you doing out here?”
“Escaping like you, but I’m sure not for the same reasons!” I whispered as I sat down next to her, she didn’t look too impressed.
“You don’t know what you are talking about!” She looked away, trying to hide her tears as they kept falling.
“You’re right, I don’t. You want to explain it to me?” I nudged her shoulder but she shook her head.
“I don’t even know you, why would I tell you anything!” Joey glared at me through her tears, as I grinned back.
“Sure you do, you know that I love watching Mighty Ducks movies and I miss my nephew, that I live next door what more do you want to know?” she sniffled a bit, stayed silent choosing not to answer the question, “Seriously Joey, the hurt you are feeling will go away!” she shook her head again, I didn’t know what else to say.
“I feel so stupid!” it was barely a whisper but I heard her, as she covered her face with her hands.
“You shouldn’t feel stupid, it wasn’t your fault!” ok that wasn’t what I should of said because, she burst into more tears.
“But it was, I let myself love him, I let him sleep with me and I let myself believe that he wouldn’t hurt me!” she was trembling now, so I reached out and hugged her, she almost crumbled on the spot with so much pain. Her hand held tight to my shirt near my collar as she tried to calm herself down.
“Shh Joey, it’s going to be ok.”
“You don’t get it, you don’t understand!” she muttered to herself, her head shaking.
“Tell me what’s wrong, I can help!”
“I can’t!” she shook her head again, I bit down on my lower lip, I didn’t know what to do.
I took her free hand in mine; “Squeeze my hand as much as it hurts!” so she did, she buried her face deep into my shirt, her tears soaking it. I smiled at least I knew I was helping this time.
To this day I can’t remember how long we had sat out there maybe it was all night or maybe just a few hours, but what I can remember is how helpless I felt towards her and how vulnerable she was, but most of all the bruises I found the next day that she had left on my hand as she released her pain.
We tired to never talk about that night or why she was crying but we both knew that it was going to come up in conversation again soon, but we didn’t know when or how.
