MICHAEL SHANE

5-15-57to 5-14-80

I believe the biggest regret in my life is never having met my brother Mike. Mike died in Germany, in the service, 13 years before I was reunited with my birth mom.

In 1998, several of us who were working on open records legislation in Delaware, had a tree planting ceremony for those Traid members who had a family member pass on before they could be reunited. I placed my brother's name on the memorial list; I could not attend the ceremony itself, I would not have made it through.

The U.S. Army has never fully explained Mike's death to us. I don't believe we will ever know the truth about it. He left behind a young pregnant wife, who gave birth to his son, Mike Jr. Mike Jr. will never know his father, but he is our legacy from him.

What purpose was served by my brother's death, I do not know. I imagine contributions he may have made to the world had he only lived. I wish I would have known him. I think we would have liked each other.

"Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you are standing outside the fire"
(From the song "Standing Outside the Fire" by Garth Brooks & Jenny Yates)

With Love Which Knows No Boundaries
Your sister, Lib Davis

Irene Deere Blair Guthrie

4-25-29to 2-17-78

I searched for my birth mother 24 years. Unfortunately she died about the time my search began. I never had the chance to hug her, thank her or tell her how much I loved her. Deep in my heart I knew, if and when I did find her she would no longer be alive. I did however find her legacy to me, five birth sisters and a brother; and an immediate and unconditional love, the likes of which I have never before experienced in my life. Upon learning that Mom was a full blood Mohawk, then and there my life and the kind of spirituality that I practiced made sense. I carried the poem below in my wallet all the time I was searching. Whenever I was down or thinking of giving up I would read it and gain the strength to carry on. In my heart I knew that those words were my mom's way of letting me know that everything would be all right.

Although her path in life was filled with many obstacles, she did her best to smooth the way for all of us with her spirit for living and her unyielding love, no matter what the cost to her. She made the hardest decision any mother could ever be asked to make. And for this, I honor her, treasure her memory, and will always keep her in my heart and spirit. My greatest loss in life is to never have held her, let her know how much I love her, or looked into her eyes and let her know everything is all right. Her spirit lives on in her children, and as a "new" member of the family I can only say that her love shines forth in each and every person whose life she has touched. I can only hope to be one-tenth the man she deserves. This poem is dedicated to my mother:

UP here On the Mound
Author Unknown

Listen carefully on this mystic night,
Up here on Up here on the mound 'neath the pale moonlight
You can hear the sounds of the Ancient Ones
The songs, the dance, the whistle and the drums.

Look closely now through the trees before
From up here on the mound throughout the forest floor
You can see them as they lived out here in the wild
The Hunter, the Warrior, The Maiden and Child

A feeling within me a vision must have occurred
While up here on the mound their spirits must have stirred
I will never forget this feeling, this feeling I have found
The Peace, The Love, The serenity up here on the mound

Mom, If you can see into my heart, I love you and my arms ache to hold you, if only once!
Your son Kevin

Michael Sean Ogilvie

4 - 8 - 1964to 5 - 1- 1988

My son was born when I was a teenager. They didn't let me see him, they didn't let me hold him, and they didn't let me name him. I am an adopted person and have often wondered if my birth parents gave me a name. Did Michael ever wonder if he had another name? Did he ever wonder if I thought about him on his birthday? When he got old enough to start school? When he got old enough for a driver's license? I did think about him. Oh I did! He has always held the most special place in my heart. I searched for him a long time; I wanted him to know that. But that was not to be. When my search finally led me to his adoptive family, July 2000, they told me Michael had been dead 12 years.

I had known for a long time that I had 3 guardian angels watching over me. I knew one was my son who died of SIDS in 1967, one was my adoptive mother who died in an auto accident in 1968. I now know the third angel was my son, Michael.

My precious son, I hope you have found peace.
"Your first Mom"
Anita Martinez

Raymond G. Nickalaskey

2- 9- 42to 9- 11- 89

Most of my Life I was Searching,
Though I never knew
quite what for,
Always, was I drawn
to things I knew not of,
Pieces of me that were hiding.

Somewhere you were out there,
Knowing not of me here.
Somewhere you smiled & cared.
Somewhere I wondered
& searched for my past,
my heritage lost in the stars.

Through Walls & Locked doors
I found the true story...
through years & through tears,
the Road led me on...
to the Village in Alaska,
Where you were once born
& where your Soul lives,
in the Home it belongs.

I want to believe,
that you can still hear me,
And that you now know,
How I wanted to see you
& hold your hand once,
How I wonder if you would be,
Proud of my life,
your grandchildren, of me...

Your Daughter.....Michele Carter

After 17 years of searching I finally walked into open arms of my birth mother, siblings, and other relatives. If only my father had been there�.__Michelle

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