october 06, 2000 I have been on a hiatus! I have forgotten what it is like to write. I have forgotten who I am. I have forgotten everything and time just passed through my life... WELCOME BACK! I am home again!
August 07 2000 I wanted to flee from this intense ugliness of emotion hidden inside all of us. I wanted to get away from it and never look back. The evil side of all humanity is always present...it's always with us. The whole society of our restless and miniscule planet since the beginning of time, repressed and learned strategies to subdue it. However, we are all at its merciless pit of blackness. It's in your brothers, sisters, fathers, mothers, and all that came and went before us...it's called madness.
Sometimes it resurfaces without anybody knowing. You can feel it inside you. When you've awaken it, you feel the pressure coming out of nowhere and it goes up to your brain, then your heart starts beating faster and your breathing exceedingly uncontrollable. The numbness of your entire body sets in with your mind suspended into some floating aura of blackness. There is nothing you can do but give in to your own horrible nightmare. This madness will drag you into the bottomless pit of terra incognito if you give in to its unforgiving tentacles.
august 06, 2000 what matters love if love cannot be shared* what matters life if life cannot be lived* my place and your place is here and now* how can we find it* I have walked alone in darkness unafraid* I have struggled alone in brightness unsecured* will life and love find me* am I lost in an abyss of forgetfullness* or is it madness?
august 05, 2000 Sometimes in life you will come across a new journey that will take your soul into forever. It all started long time ago, in a place where all young people find their true selves. It's a place called falling in love. This is where all emotions are awaken and all obstacles are nothing but a mere word. It seems that the whole world is within your grasp until one day, everything that you have ever known and everything that you have ever believed in crumbed like pieces of puzzles, never the become whole again.
This is a love story. A sad, but nonetheless a true love story and a measure of one's own strength, weakness, and patience. They say that love does conquer all, but it is not always true for everyone.
I am still working on this story. I just want you to read a glimpse of it. Maybe next time I will let you read the whole shebang, but as of now it remains in my own dimension.
march 21, 2000 In my search for a definite answer, I found a shallow emotion. There is nothing there but emptiness, nothing. However, it is in this greatest void that I found myself; it is where I began to comprehend love's definition. Love is not found in "togetherness or closeness" ; neither is it found in "a kiss or making love". Love simply is what is.
march 22, 2000 In this park, you can hear the cars speeding towards their own particular destination. It is also here where you find lovers meeting as if seeing each other for the first time in years {or simply just cheating on their husbands/wives) I see a lot of things and I see a lot of people, but then I ask myself what I am doing here. What attracts me to this place? Surely, it is not the serenity and solitude I am searching for. Is this an escape from my mundane world or from my hectic and boisterous life? Then it occurred to me that this is where I find my true self. In this small piece of land, we have recreated what we have left behind; what we have destroyed. This park is a sanctuary, a home....
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