Aug 24: "You can have my cello, it has a skull on it"
Aug 22:"I'm looking for my sungla-- on my head"
July 22:"why, there's a river right here." "how convenient!"
July 16: "hi alison, it's cookie"
July 7: "your mother's a freaking aardvark!"
June 29: "thought I would forget, but I, I remember, cause I, I remember- I REMEMBER!"
June 26: "they're like rabbit plants"
June 25: "Well, the cook doesn't love you"
June 23: "Now I need to find a dog... oh there we go!"
June 5: "You killed my dog and blinded my shirpah!"
May 30: "What ho, Horatio"
May 25: "Wine is made from grapes."
May 20: "Mahhhrlboro! Colour inside the lines! Mahhhrlboro!"
May 16: "Then Bill Gates will take over the world and he'll be like, 'Now everyone turn on your computer monitors! Niyaie!'"
May 14:"I wish my life were a play, then I could yell, 'CUT' and go get a danish."
May 12: "Thank you, Darrell, for wearing pants."
May 7: "Oh look, I can't find my shirt..."
May 5: "Where is my screwdriver?"
May 3: "Sheep don't talk."
May 2: "The cheat is grounded. We had that lightswitch installed for you so you could turn the lights on and off. Not so you could throw light switch raves. Now let's go break open that glowstick and pour it in Homestar's Mountain Dew. I hear you have to get your stomach pumped for drinking that stuff..."
May 1: "Oh, it's not a mass murderer, it's only Morgan."
April 30: "And thank you, Stan." "Are you drunk?" "Excuse me, I have to unscrew my smile."
April 29: "I'm sad that I'm flying."
April 28: "Tu tapes trop fort, ca fait des etincelles. Tiens je t'ai apportee du cafe."
April 27:"It's a big bowl of punch."
April 26: "Like on a scale of one to ten." "Uh, like, uh, fourteen."
April 25: "I seatbelted the cheat in." (Happy Birthday Tim!)
April 24:"Who do I believe? What's going on?"
April 23: "I can't answer. Laryngitis."
April 22: "Flounder, flounder in the sea..." (Happy Birthday Shellie!)
April 21: "Hi friend." "Hi friend." "Hi boyfriend." "Hey, husband."
April 20: "Obviously" "Clearly" "Naturally"
April 19:"I know you can be overwhelmed and underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?" "I think you can in Europe."
April 18: "Don't... you... fear... God?"
April 17: "Do you eat the red ones last?" "No, I eat the brown ones last."
April 16: "You should really wear a seatbelt." "Look, I don't need driving advice from a-" *CRASH**SMASH*
April 15: "I like Oreos." "That's great."
April 13: "Exactly. If you don't want your kid to turn out like Hitler, Devon or Stanley you had better pay attention to them."
April 5: "yeah, but see that's not an insult because it's my last name."
April 2: "woot woot"
March 30: "She doubled for the bridal?"
March 29: "I have been tampered with."
March 28: "qui est ton cloture?"
March 26: "Noun it up AT-GD" "verb."
March 25: "I remember not remembering what happened."
March 24: "As a smile clings to your face, when your laughter makes the world sing, when a friendship turns to gold."
March 23: "Nothing is as obnoxious as other people's luck."
March 22: "A storm broke loose in my mind."
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