A New York City man is suing four fast-food chains, claiming their fatty junk-food faire made him obese and unhealthy. His beef is that McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, and KFC provided deceptive nutritional information and created a craving in his case, five times a week for their high-calorie, high-fat crap food. "This sort of action gives frivolous a bad name," says the National Restaurant Association's Steven Anderson. Surely, nobody expects to stay trim and fit eating Big Macs and fries. Right? Wrong, says lawyer Samuel Hirsch, who says the lawsuit is designed to get the companies to cover his client's pharmaceutical costs and pressure them to offer healthier options.

Wake up AmeriKKKan junk food conglomerates! Quit exporting that filth over to other nations and destroy their local eating habits, and ultimately their culture. Denizens of countries such as Japan, who have historically low cases of heart disease are suffering from obesity-related diseases. What we need is wheat-free McVegan burgers and algae shakes on the menu. Prune juice would be good too. It would help old farts with regularity problems. And let's not forget organic shoyu ramen, made from non-GMO soybeans. Better yet, eat real food the civilised way by joining the slow foods movement.