Oliver: Gary
Monique: Laurel

(Note: During this sketch, Monique stands across the stage from Oliver while he talks. She drinks a carton of milk and looks sexy.)

Oliver: (Holding a carton of milk.) Hi. That's Monique over there. Isn't she hot? And how do you think she's gotten that figure? Well, by drinking milk of course. She's been drinking milk ever since she was just a small high school girl -- pushed around and ignored by all the boys. But just look at her now! Milk, you see, is fortified with essential vitamins and calcium to keep sexy bodies like Monique's healthy on the inside and looking great on the outside. So drink milk. I do. And Monique's noticed...

Monique: (Comes over seductively and plays with Oliver's ear) Hi, Oliver.

Oliver: But so what? 'Cause I'm gay. Milk. It does a body good... but sometimes, it just doesn't matter. (He walks away from her.)